New Liquor Warnings

Discussion in 'The Lounge' started by Bella, Jan 17, 2007.

  1. Bella

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Oct 18, 2006
    Messages:
    5,930
    Likes Received:
    22
    Gender:
    Female

    Liquor manufacturers have accepted the Government's suggestion
    That the following warning labels be placed immediately on all
    Varieties of alcohol containers:
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
    WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may leave you wondering what the
    Hell happened to your bra and panties.
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
    WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may make you think you are
    Whispering when you are not.
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
    WARNING: The consumption of alcohol is a major factor in
    Dancing like a retard.
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
    WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause you to tell your
    Friends over and over again that you love them.
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
    WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause you to think you
    Can sing.
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
    WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may lead you to believe that
    Ex-lovers are really dying for you to telephone them at four in the
    Morning.
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
    WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may make you think you can
    Logically converse with members of the opposite sex without spitting.
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
    ***WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may create the illusion
    That you are tougher, smarter, faster and better looking than most
    People.
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
    WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may lead you to think
    People are laughing WITH you.
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
    WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause pregnancy.
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
    WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may lead you to believe you
    Are invisible.
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
    WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause a disturbance
    In the time-space continuum, leaving you unable to account for large
    Chunks of time.
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
    ***WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may make you think you
    Have mystical Kung Fu powers, resulting in you getting your ass
    Kicked.
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
    WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause you to roll over
    In the morning and see something really scary.
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
    WARNING: The consumption of alcohol is the leading cause of
    Inexplicable rug burns on the forehead, knees and lower back.
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
    WARNING: The crumsumpten of alcohol may Mack you tink you kan
    Tpye reel gode.

    :rofl
    ~Bella
     
  2. heelfetish

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Nov 23, 2006
    Messages:
    7,392
    Likes Received:
    8
    bwahahahaha! OMG, every one of those is true. :lol
     
  3. Bella

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Oct 18, 2006
    Messages:
    5,930
    Likes Received:
    22
    Gender:
    Female

    :rofl I know!!
    ~Bella
     
  4. pussycat69

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Jan 2, 2006
    Messages:
    2,964
    Likes Received:
    1
    Gender:
    Female
    Location:
    Northeast
  5. Rose

    Rose Resident Sexy Grandma
    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Feb 8, 2005
    Messages:
    6,823
    Likes Received:
    24
    Gender:
    Female
    Location:
    Dixie Land
    i tnk th lest one is sily. i ca typ, no mttr hw mch i cunsoooooooooom

    *burp*
     
  6. Thorn

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Feb 8, 2005
    Messages:
    4,151
    Likes Received:
    5
    This one is TRUE! I have the scars to prove it. :eek:
     
  7. heelfetish

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Nov 23, 2006
    Messages:
    7,392
    Likes Received:
    8
    Rose!! Cover your mouth when you burp, dear. I don't want any more rude behavior when you visit the Hide-Away. :lol
     
  8. Bluesy

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Aug 18, 2006
    Messages:
    3,779
    Likes Received:
    16
    Gender:
    Female
    Argh. I've been on the receiving end of this one a few times :p

    Good one, Bella :lol
     
  9. Bella

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Oct 18, 2006
    Messages:
    5,930
    Likes Received:
    22
    Gender:
    Female

    I thought they were pretty true & funny!! :lol
    ~Bella




    :lol Rose, you crack me up!
    ~Bella




    Well, I don't have scars, but I have been there too! :lol
    ~Bella



    :lol
    ~Bella



    :lol I think we all have experienced more than one of these before!
    ~Bella
     
  10. Puss_in_boots

    Puss_in_boots Adminatrix
    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Apr 19, 2006
    Messages:
    6,443
    Likes Received:
    26
    Gender:
    Female
    :lol Those are almost too true to be funny.

    There was another one I heard recently about how if you want to simulate what it's like to be abducted by aliens, then simply drink two bottles of vodka.
    You'll wake up in a strange place with no memory of what happened and possibly discover you've been "probed."
     
  11. Bella

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Oct 18, 2006
    Messages:
    5,930
    Likes Received:
    22
    Gender:
    Female

    Now that is a scary thought!
    ~Bella
     
  1. This site uses cookies to help personalise content, tailor your experience and to keep you logged in if you register.
    By continuing to use this site, you are consenting to our use of cookies.
    Dismiss Notice