i need to poop

Discussion in 'The Lounge' started by starberry, Nov 12, 2007.

  1. starberry

    starberry New Member

    Joined:
    Sep 26, 2007
    Messages:
    29
    Likes Received:
    0
    Gender:
    Female
    I know this is so gross but I am so desperate.
    The low down is I dont get paid until tommorow and I am flat broke, and I am sososososo constipated, ewww I know. I cant buy anything, what around the house can I do to GET THIS OUT??!!
    My boyfriend suggested caffiene so I'm trying that now but any other suggestion? Eat a certain something along those lines. Reply quick!
     
  2. Barbwire

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Jan 20, 2007
    Messages:
    9,787
    Likes Received:
    244
    Gender:
    Female
    What? What? WHAT?! Why are you asking us? Isn't there a constipation forum somewhere? :ugh
     
  3. slamd097

    slamd097 New Member

    Joined:
    Jan 16, 2007
    Messages:
    485
    Likes Received:
    1
    Gender:
    Male
    Um...Bran, grapes, peanuts, and get creative and make your self an enema. Ok, that last one is extreme measures...but um...yeah..Im out..
     
  4. dwj21

    dwj21 New Member

    Joined:
    Aug 27, 2007
    Messages:
    140
    Likes Received:
    0
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Maryland
    brew some coffee, let it cool to a lukewarm temp. then use it as an enema. not only is it good for you it will take care of your problem too!!!
     
  5. AnonymousOne

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Jan 27, 2006
    Messages:
    5,845
    Likes Received:
    3
    Gender:
    Male
    This is one of the strangest Lounge threads I have ever seen.
     
  6. Hot Wheels

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Sep 12, 2006
    Messages:
    3,415
    Likes Received:
    38
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Sydney,Australia
    If you really are..sosososo constipated...and need relief "right now"...then an enema sounds like the way to go......;)


    Did you hear the one about the constipated mathematician?

    He worked it out with a pencil:D

    Opps...sorry...I couldnt help myself...:eek:utahere
     
  7. Thorn

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Feb 8, 2005
    Messages:
    4,151
    Likes Received:
    5
    12 CLs usually does it for me the next morning.

    Note: CLs = Coors Lights
     
  8. cook74

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Jul 21, 2007
    Messages:
    4,549
    Likes Received:
    7,822
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Sydney, Australia
    :lol

    Eat 1/2 a kilo of honey, that should get you moving :dgrin
     
  9. Halogen

    Halogen New Member

    Joined:
    May 14, 2007
    Messages:
    450
    Likes Received:
    4
    Gender:
    Female
    Location:
    USA
    I wouldn't necessarily put coffee up my butt..but I would drink it for constipation. That will get it moving!

    ETA: Red wine too!
     
  10. dwj21

    dwj21 New Member

    Joined:
    Aug 27, 2007
    Messages:
    140
    Likes Received:
    0
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Maryland
    coffee enemas are a good way to really cleanse the colon and help detox the body. it is a method used in alternative medicines.
     
  11. heelfetish

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Nov 23, 2006
    Messages:
    7,392
    Likes Received:
    8
    Never heard of it. But during my 3 trips to the hospital for my tonsillitis, I always ended up with constipation victims around me. Some stool softeners and enemas were the doctor's orders, and it worked like a charm each time.

    Those people were in serious agony, I hope I never have to go through that. :ugh
     
  12. Rose

    Rose Resident Sexy Grandma
    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Feb 8, 2005
    Messages:
    6,823
    Likes Received:
    23
    Gender:
    Female
    Location:
    Dixie Land
    Ever heard of Activa Yogurt? Made by Dannon, it claims to relieve many lower abdominal malfunctions, if you eat one small 4-ounce container a day. I took the challenge, and IT WORKS!!!

    From bloating to lack of "elimination" for several days at a time, I used to pop every pill they put on the market. Activa doesn't cause any painful side effects, but the live cultures (L.bulgaricus,S.thermophilus and Bifidobacterium - - :shrug) just make everything down there work like it should. Doesn't cause flatulence (that's farts, for all you guys out there :lol ), nor does it cause diarreah. You just kinda get normal!!

    Try it!
     
  13. bighiker2003

    bighiker2003 Banned

    Joined:
    Jan 27, 2004
    Messages:
    3,754
    Likes Received:
    9
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Northern Indiana
    Halogen said
    That will do it , Tomorrow.
    But she is broke and can't buy any.

    So what to do, I have been their,
    and I ate a little uncooked greens or just grass.
    that should so it.
    But anyway you probably have it solved by now.

    Hiker
     
  14. Animularisen

    Animularisen New Member

    Joined:
    Mar 25, 2007
    Messages:
    933
    Likes Received:
    5
    How do you put coffee up your bum on your own?!
    Isn't it meant to be done at spas, and doctors. lol
     
  15. AnonymousOne

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Jan 27, 2006
    Messages:
    5,845
    Likes Received:
    3
    Gender:
    Male
    This is SO going in the memorable quotes thread....
     
  16. Dreama

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    May 16, 2006
    Messages:
    3,890
    Likes Received:
    21
    Gender:
    Female
    Well, try drinking some warm water....It's always helped me.
     
  17. Puss_in_boots

    Puss_in_boots Adminatrix
    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Apr 19, 2006
    Messages:
    6,443
    Likes Received:
    26
    Gender:
    Female
    This thread was originally posted five days ago. Let's hope she was able to resolve the situation satisfactorily.
     
  1. This site uses cookies to help personalise content, tailor your experience and to keep you logged in if you register.
    By continuing to use this site, you are consenting to our use of cookies.
    Dismiss Notice