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Discussion in 'Ask a Guy/Girl' started by runforyoulife, Feb 3, 2012.
Just like the subject says... How do you know if he's into you? Enlighten me
well "into you " how? emotionally? i honestly dont know how you can tell.... we (men)have spent alot of time figuring out just what to say to you to get into your pants.....which when you think about it, means we're saying what we think you wanna hear, not really saying what's in our hearts or minds....i guess what i'm saying is there's no way to know, you just have to give a guy a chance ...and the time to get to know him...
now , how to tell if he's interested physically? turn off your head and listen to your instincts...you'll know. i can usually walk into a room of people ,and within a few minutes , know exactly which women are "interested" and which ones i dont stand a chance in hell with...and women hide their "interest" much better than men do...you should be able to spot the "interested" guy....he'll be the one humping your leg at the bar....
I am blunt and forward. If I like a woman more than just at a platonic level, I tell her up front. Recently this has sent one female friend running for the hills. But another female friend feels the same way I do and likes that I am blunt and honest.
If I am "into" a woman, I reply to texts quickly and keep the conversation going until it fizzles or has to be ended. I answer the phone quickly and will answer even when I'm driving (that's a big deal for me considering it is illegal and a pet peeve of mine). I will go out of my way to see her but make it seem like I was just in the area. I will share my large collection of music, burn cd's, transfer mp3's, etc. I will share my poetry with her, and that's a big deal because I don't share it very easily.
If a dude is into you but not forward enough to just flat out tell you, he will want to spend time with you, do things with you. He should look you in the eyes often. He will do things for you that he doesn't do for anyone else.
+1 and, he will treat you as an equal partner in the relationship, respect your needs and opinions, and graciously accept "no" for an answer when necessary.
I don't know what made me feel I had to comment on this, but I did....
And unfortunately, that is where a lot of guys get burned because a lot of girls take advantage of that or are oblivious to it. Usually the former, though. Either way, once a guy finally pulls his head out of his ass and figures out he is being used, he will feel hurt, betrayed, etc.
So, Ladies, if a guy you DON'T like starts doing stuff for you he wouldn't do for others, and you have a conscience, recognize this, and don't lead the guy on and use him. A lot of times that is coming from the guy's heart, and when you burn him like that, it is hard for him to want to do that again for anyone.
my gf also, appreciates the "blunt" approach...just say it....she hates it when guys beat around the bush...but not all women feel that way...some think you should take your time ,get to know them before youre too forward. Part of the fun is figuring out how to approach her...you know, tracking the prey so to speak.
i'm surprised that a woman is asking this question tho..i would think men are pretty transparent...women are more likely to be "hard to read" .. i think, anyway...
I like all the input here. It's interesting to hear YOUR side.
Stumpy, I love your approach. It is honest and straight forward-- the way both men and men should be. Keep it real with no mind games.
And of course we are told what you guys think we want to hear?
You have to have a sense about when he is being honest and when he is stringing you along. As a general rule, it's the little things he may do, that may go unnoticed by you, that will give you clues about his real feelings about you.
You can figure this out quickly with the following question: Is he's willing to make you a "priority'?
ie: Guys nights out or other weekend activates come second to you - or are you only spending time with him when it suits his schedule/options.
That said, positions can change. When I became single recently, I was dating a few different women - the one who I thought was a long shot in terms of long term compatibility (because she was too young) was my Monday/Tuesday night date (and she was cool with this too, because she also thought we were a long shot). Whereas the hot doctor was getting my Friday and Saturday nights. But in the end, the younger women and I ended up really clicking and we've been in an exclusive relationship for a few months now...
When I was dating, I was always very upfront. If I wasn't all over you like a cheap suit.....I wasn't interested. They didn't call me the octopus for nothing. Sure I had female friends that were strictly friends, but unless I was actively trying to get in your pants...you're in the friend zone.
I know this is a question for guys, but there are universal body language signs that primarily all men do subconsciously. Facial expressions: Eyebrows raise, lips part, his nostrils flare, his eyes will sparkle and will be wide or either slanted but he will look generally "intrigued" and fascinated, as if he is staring at a masterpeice of art, and his whole face will seem friendly, relaxed and open, and he will also scan your body. Body language signs include trying to be face to face with you, grooming, touching his face, fidgeting with clothes, "accidentally" finding excuses to bump into you or touch you, trying to attract your attention, ect, there are a lot more.
As a guy, here is the secret, "ask"? no one likes being told no, but I guarantee this if you are a lady, a guy will put out, bottome line
and the glance that lasts a fraction of a second too long.....as if to say "i'm looking at YOU "
Male half here:
Honestly, we as guys are simple, to figure out...if we are just being friendly then theres your answer, we want to be friends...
If we are heavily flirting with you, we want to fuck you
If we are flirting, being nice, helping you, pushing our issues aside to help you with yours, being the go to guy when something is going on in your life, regardless of what it is...we want the whole deal
Very true.....except for the relaxed part. When I was younger I had a hard time being relaxed around a girl if I had a real crush. It varies:eyes
But yeah, and I think this is true for many guys, especially the more visually oriented ones: if we are attracted to you we have problems NOT looking at you. It's almost like an addiction.
I like your input on that Thunderseed
And agree with you 12, that's when it gets fun
I am guessing you have someone other than your husband you are thinking of?
when im into a girl I tell her cant wait to se her I need to see her now. In then i cant shut up when Im around them. I want to fuck them but not just fuck I want to make them know Im making love tot hem. Not just fucking. There is a diffrence. Its a lot more holding and eye contact. when I want a girl to know I really like them no matter what were doing i look deep into there eyes. I want them to melt asmuch as I am. I also wait until they are cuminging and thats when i look into their eyes. I think that shows you really like them.