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Discussion in 'Sex and Relationships' started by Kitty86, Apr 2, 2006.
Help me please!!!!
I suspect my boyfriend has been unfaithful to me ((((
Make that a hot link so we will know what it is.
You can copy and paste the url into your browser.
It's sneaky and dishonest. It would also be hard to believe, since it asks for names.
We need more information then that to help.
Why do you think he's been unfaithful? How's your current relationship now?
Dear Kitty 86,
There are different arrangements couples make regarding how open the relationship is, has been, or is going to be.
Exclusivity in dating, is something that is ordinarily negotiated, sometimes less directily.
Had you told your BF that you were being faithful to him?
Did you expect BF to be in love with you after your first kiss, and never look at another woman?
Have you ever had a BF cheat on you before? What are your feelings and knowledge about your parents, aunts, uncles, other family members?
What is it that you were doing for BF, that you felt he should be absolutely faithful to you?
How indiscreet was BF? Was BF trying to keep it secret to protect your honor?
Was BF careless about letting people know about his other affair?
Senator Clinton sometimes throws a temper tantrum at Bill. Have you let BF know how upset you would feel if he actually had an affair? Many famous and repsected women have tolerated infidelity in their marriages. How are you so superior to all these other respectable women?
How about teling BF, "If you had any affairs before now, I don't want to hear about them. But I just want to be sure you know that I will feel terribly hurt if you have an affair. So I need your promise now, that we have an exclusive relationship, from now on, at least."
Why is it important to you that your BF not step out?
You may expect your BF to know what is in your mind. There are many tolernace levels of openess in a relationship and marriage. Post here what your feeligs are about fidelity, so you will be able to clearly communicate your desires to this BF, or the next one after you dump this guy.
I personally try to walk the line for my woman, because I am hoping that she will become more receptive to how she can be accommodating to me and my desires. Do you have more accomodating maneuvers to offer BF?
Pesonally, I am more interested in what my wife is doing for me. I chose not to get overly concerned about her sins. I pray that she stops sinning, if she ever did. But the way I look at it, she has to answer for her sins. The consequences of Sin sometimes occur in this lifetime, at unexpected moments. I just try to keep myself on the narrow path.
I am pretty sure that my parteaner had been faithful to me, but the thing i hate the most is being lied too, expiable when i know she is liying, why cant she just tell me the truth!
Amen to that, Hiddenslave. I know my wife has lied to me. I told her I KNEW she was lying, but she wouldn't change her story. I'd have asked her to marry me a couple years sooner if not for that one silly lie she insisted on sticking to. It made me wonder how many other lies she'd told me and what I could believe.
But I think all people tell lies of one kind or another at times; I know I do. Sometimes it's just soooo much easier than telling the whole truth....
And no, I don't think I've ever had a partner who has "cheated" on me. Had sex with someone other than me after our relationship began? Yes, but we weren't "partners" then, and I was porking every woman who looked twice at me.
WTF!!! What am I lying about???
rut row ........................
Sorry that you think your partner is cheating on you.
Me and my wife a vero open relationship. If we are hurt or no matter what we feel we tell each other. Sometimes it is silly things and sometime it is something that really bothers one of us.
When we where dating we told each other that we want to be open and honest. If you can't be open and honest to the one you marry. It won't be a happy marriage.
I always put my wife before me in everything and she tries to do the same for me. As of right now I am fully confident that she has never cheated on me since I meet her. We dated 1 year and been married 4 1/2 Years.
i dont know why people cheat, is the temptation too much. Dont do want you wouldnt want done to yourself.
No, none of my 3 partners has done anything like this to me. I don't think I could get over this. it would be the end, no matter how much I loved the guy.
My now ex fiancee and I had some serious trust issues in the scheme of things, and it's what ruined us. We went headfirst downhill and once we started rolling, there was little to do.
So fix this now. Figure out the root of the problem LOGICALLY. Have they been unfaithful in past relationships? Do they lie a lot? Think about what's been said in these responses for sure. If there is something majorly obvious about his actions that suggest he's been unfaithful- confront him. IMMEDIATELY. If you haven't yet go now. Every second is making it worse.
But do not accuse. Inquire.
And do it from the most objective level you can. Try not to burst into tears or yell or anything of the like, as much as you can. Many times it will just push your partner into the defensive.
Hope this helps, goodluck.
i never experienced something like this... when there is unfaith, the respect is paseed away already...