Background color
Background image
Border Color
Font Type
Font Size
  1. I'm gonna expand it since i can't edit it

    ] star
    [Janeway is spread eagle with a phaser dildo] Mark! Mark! wish you were here! I need your Shuttle in my Cargo Bay!]
    [door chime]
    Janeway: fucking hell [stands up in her night gown after deactivating the phaser dildo].... Come In
    [WOOSH! the doors open and Tuvok enters]
    [Janeway is standing in nothing but a nightgown]
    Tuvok: Am I Disturbing You, Captain?
    Janeway: Not at all [she smiles] what can i do for you Tuvok? [she brushes his arm softly]
    Tuvok: I've got the sensor logs you requested [hands over the PAD with the data]
    Janeway: Why are you giving me to this, Tuvok? this was Ensign Kim's assignment
    Tuvok: It was but he had other plans
    Janeway: Oh...I see, and that would be what?
    Tuvok: He had a....holodeck appointment with Mister Paris
    Janeway: [grunts postively and a nod]hmm! you know they're fucking right?
    Tuvok: I was not aware of that fact,
    Janeway: Like Bert & Ernie
    Tuvok: is it a violation of Star Fleet protocol?
    Janeway: No but this is [she drops her gown to the floor, her pubic hair is groomed into the Kirk Era arrow head symbol of starfleet]
    [Janeway approaches and cltuches Tuvok]
    Janeway: I'm so hot for you Tuvok
    Tuvok: Fascinating
    Janeway: Like what you see?
    Tuvok: Your physical attributes intrigue me, Captain
    Janeway: Well big boy, you just gonna stand there or are you gonna jump my bones
    Tuvok: To say you're attractive is the understatement of century therefore to not "jump your bones" would be [turns his head sharply to look into the camera]ILLOGICALl!
    Janeway: Well get busy you vulcan stud! That's an order!
    [Tuvok drops trou] Phaser armed and ready. Set to level 7 arousal
    Janeway: Battle stations! [while shaking her head smiling and arms out]
    [Tuvok pushes her onto the bed and spreads her legs]
    Tuvok: Thrusters engaged!
    Janeway: Board my vessel baby!
    Tuvok: The vessel has docked, Captain!
    Janeway: Red Alert! I think you hit my G-spot!
    Tuvok: Commencing Operation Make My Captain Come
    Janeway: Oh gosh! you've done it!
    Tuvok: My phaser is armed!
    Janeway: Fire At Wil!
    Tuvok: Yes Captain
    [fires his weapon at Wil Wheton]
    [Janeway]Fucking kid! Ruined Next Gen! Now fuck me you only black Vulcan in Starfleet!
    [Chakotay barges in] Captain, i've been going over these level 3 type 7 neuro-connetic experimental Tachyon-Dylithium converter overlays a bunch of words no one gives a shit about from Alpha Confetti Seti in the Saget system...[stops dead in his tracks].GoooWahhhhhh....
    Janeway: CHAKOTAY!!
    Tuvok: THis isn't what it looks like, Commander!
    Chakotay: Then what is it Lieutenet?!?! Huh? You've docked with your Captain, Explain that motherfucker!
    Tuvok: I was merely making scans of her body, clothes inhibite the procedure
    Janeway: DEEPscans!
    Chakotay: Deep scans my ass! We're gonna handle it like we would in my tribe! To the death!
    [Star Trek: TOS battle theme heard]
    Tuvok: What in *beep* was that?!:
    Janeway: Sorry, Tuvie, that's my ringtone, Picard is calling!
    Chaktay: Belay that cell transmission!
    Tuvok: Lets get it on, to not would be [looks into the camera] ILLOGICAL!
    [Chakotay rips off his shirt]
    Tuvok: Logic dictates that since you slept with a night light in your quarters, you are therefore a pussy! I accept your challenge, pussy!
    Chakotay: Do you ahve to tell him everything Kathryn!?!
    Janeway: Sometimes I say crazy shit in bed, shit one time i called B''elanna Tores mommy
    Tuvok: we will discuss your sluttiness another time, after i get tested, but before then i'm gonna kick Chakotay's ass!
    Chakotay: Get that *beep* camera out of here!
    [shuttled POV of camera man, nearly tripping in POV] Sorry Comander!
  2. Sesame Street Banned?

    Despite the popularity and nearly unamonious endorsement of educators, parents, and their target audience, Sesame Street is not without its critics. In the small town of Avalon, Georgia, there is much discussion of banning the Educational Program.

    Confused? A little history may be necessary to fully understand. Since the passage of the "Devil's Box Prohibition Act of 1953" televisions were banned from 1953 until 1998 when the Prohibition was lifted. The rationale behind such a prohibition was due to a concern about the impact of 50's television on moral values. The act had been discussed years prior but gained momentum when the residents of Avalon were outraged by the depecition of a pregnant woman on "I Love Lucy."

    Following the passage of the ban, televisions were gathered up by authorities and in a public display were smashed and burned in a pyre to symbolize the burning away of impure thoughts that may have been present while watching sitcoms.Fast forward to the year 1996: Fox News is launched. Due to the lack of newspapers that report outside the city limits of the town, it takes almost a year for the news of the new conservative news network to reach the town of Avalon. This was also in part due to the lack of ventures both personal and finanical as part of a collective effort to preserve the values of the community.

    While this knowledge piqued the interest of the Avalon to overturn the ban on television, it was not until a local wanted to broadcast his own cable access show. Jethro Wallace had been mulling over a program that would providing hunting tips and local news commentary. He started a petition to overturn the ban on television in the spring of 1998. The grass roots effort proved sucessful as he obtained 100 signatures for his petition, making up 40% of the population of Avalon. The petition was presented to the local legislative brnach whose members up for re-election voted in favor of repealing the 1953 Act.

    Over the next six months, the locals obtained once again televisions and were installing their homes with cable hookups. They were pleased by the new Fox News but felt it was a bit too liberal. They also applauded new local cable access program and the programs that followed.

    But one program of particular concern was PBS. This network hosted many alien concepts: foreign cultures, nature shows, sex ed programming, "revisionist" history of the civil war and Cirque De Soleil, described by one local "the gayest **** i've eva seen." The most controversial program proved to be Sesame Street. While offended by many other programs offered by the network, this particular program was considered to be beyond offensive. Subversive is what many described it as. To quote one local "Sesame Street is dangerous and corrupts children."

    Sesame Street corrupting children? This program we've weaned our children on and taught them how to share and accept each others differences and introduces children to reading? Jacob Lee of the local government profanely explained it: "I can't believe they put this homosexual, n*****-loving, communist garbage on the air! We are at war with the Commies and we put this on television?!? It's obviously a conspiracy so that by the time these kids grow up, they will be unfit to take them those b*****ds on! All this sharing...which leads to communists...all this conflict resolution turns kids into homosexuals...all these Mopeds which obviously are *beep* and sp*cs in disguise being taught to be equals...will lead to race mixing...that's just plain disgusting, like *beep* a monkey! would you want your children to *beep* a monkey? well maybe up north but not down here! Before they'll invite *beep* ruining our *beep* existance! They even have *beep* talking to children, obscene as we all understand the Negro mind is as filthy as their skin! We've worked hard to keep our community white. We have standards! We must save our children before it's too late! Won't someone think of the children!"

    So now the debate rages on in this little community. Not just on the merits of the educational program nor PBS but of television as a whole which lead some to suspect "it's 1953 all over again!" Another program that is causing concern is the broadcasts of "Cirque De Soleil" which is feared to cause homosexuality and "Reading Rainbow" which encourages children to read books other than The Bible. Challenges lie ahead now that a resident has finally obtained a computer. It remains to be seen what the community of Avalon will think of the Internet. Stay posted, my friends :)

    -Ema Nymton
  3. I realized that that Neil bit wasnt working, but was too stubborn to consider changing it until now. I'ts still lacking in detail and too abreviated but we all gotta start somewhere. I like this opening much better!

    [overhead shot of Kermit walking alongside the road]
    [the overhead shot tracks slowly as kermit approaches a fenced in cemetary]
    [the camera continues as kermit raises his hand from his pocket revealing an iPOD]
    [it stops and focuses as his green finger presses a button below a display that says Pantera: Cemetary Gates]
    [with a sigh kermit produces a bolt cutter, and cries while he breaks into the cemetary]
    [kermit opens hte gates and it reveals a massive echosystem of trees and birds and grave stones]
    [kermit with hands in pockets strolls around]
    [sweeping shot of Mister Hooper's grave]
    [swing POV shot to John Henson's grave]
    [stays steady and reveals Richard Hunt's grave]
    Kermit Inner Monologue: Of All The Ones Who Left best friend had to go yet that greasy slap of ribs is still

    alive. WHy!?!?! or why must Jimmy die while that fat pig still lives...
    [Kermit hears shuffling behind him]
    [Kermit turns, a vaguely familar form appears but obscured by shadows]
    Kermit: HELLO!
    [no answer]
    Kermit: HELLLLLLLOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!
    [no answer]
    [the shuffled figure comes into range]
    [Richard Nixon snarls]
    [Kermit walks back but trips and stumbles]
    Kermit: Stand back im your friend!
    [Richard Nixon ignores him]
    [Gonzo arrives in his zombie mobile and fires at the Richard Nixon zombie]
    \Gonzo: get in!
    Kermit: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! [runs screaming in]
    [Gonzo rushes out in his van accidently knocking over a tombstone, the camera zooms in and reveals it belongs to John

    Kermit: Thanx for saving me from that zombie
    Gonzo: Zombie? I didn't know Nixon was dead!
    Gonzo: Ever since i saw that movie on late night tv..i knew this day was coming...ever since I saw Jack Ass: The Movie. I

    knew the world was gonna end in a Zombie Apocopylse
    (On screen title: so you know i am, it’s the opening)

    [exterior shot of Gonzo racing across town with CHICKS RULE! as a roof sticker]
    [dawn of the dead theme by goblin playing]
    Gonzo: I had seen this before....on i had to race out and save all my freinds!
    Kermit: WHAT?!
    [Gonzo turns down the Dawn of the Dead theme from his stereo]
    Gonzo: Never mind but we need to pick up everyone who isn’t already a zombie! Even Miss Piggy!
    Kermit: Why the fuck didn’t you just let her die!
    Gonzo: I’d just kill her later and bite into her than have her bite into me
  4. Kermit: I need to head off and find Robin
    Miss Piggy: Always dumbass like htat, to leave him home when theres a epidemic
    Kermit: i’m not....oh fuck it, i’m gonna get it and them i’m gonna fucking kill you
    Miss Piggy: i’d like to see you try
    Fozzie: though i rather have us have unity, i have dibs on the ribs

    [kermit tosses everyone a gun from Gonzo’s duffle bag]

    Kermit: If it looks undead fucking kill it, don’t hesitate to shoot!
    Dr. Teeth: Ten Four Greenback!
    [miss piggy spins the chamber of her pearl handled revolver]
    [scooter holds up his twin berettas]
    [gonzo cocks fixes his flame thrower]
    [rolf loads his magnum]
    [Fozzie cocks the Shot Gun]
    [janice keeps her katana]

    Kermit: this way! shoot everything that looks dead! RUN!

    [they carefully jog and make sure no is in the line of fire]
    [miss piggy gets the first shot and shoots a big blue monster zombie]
    [Fozzie stops and fires and knocks down a zombie by blowing off it’s leg and scooter finishes it off]
    Fozzie: Kermit! w’ere gonna clear this section out you and Dr. Teeth go for Robin at the cafe

    Gonzo: STAND BACK! [unleashes an inferno upon the zombies!]
    [Janice impales one as Rolf blows it’s head off with the magnum]
    [Fozzie Disables one by severing it’s leg via his shotgun and scooter shoots it in thead head]
    [Fozzie senses it behind him and puts the gun over his shoulder and fires blowing it off at the neck]
    [Miss piggy empties her revolver Paris Hilton]
    [miss piggy takes cover though no other bullets are fired as she reloads]
    [forgetting that you have to aim for the head Paris rises]
    [miss piggy fires]
    [Fozzie fires at the same time and makes Paris’ head explode]
    Fozzie: damn i missed!
    [Janice decapitates elmos illegitment son he had with Linda]

    [Gonzo aims higher and roasts only the heads burning them and disabling them as scooter aims for the head and shoots them finishign them off after Gonzo blinds them]
    Gonzo: good work lil man your uncle would be proud
    Scooter: Don’t worry, i got my revenge, i dont’ know if zombies feel pain but if they did he was in agnoy rest asured
    [Fozzie keeps trying to aim for miss piggy’s head....til Nicole Richie gets in teh way and it explodes..but just as miss piggy discharges her weapon]
    Miss PIggy: i’m such a bad-ass!
    Fozzie: Dammit ta hell!
    [Fozzie Aims Again...ti Ashley Olsen gets in teh way and he fires and makes her anrerexic head explode]
    Fozzie: Fuck me! that pig needs to be taken out and these anerexic bitches get in the way
    [Janice waves to Fozzie]
    [Fozzie rushes over and shoots the legs off two zombies as Janices decapites them]
    Fozzie: We make a good team
    Janice: We all make a good team
    [bernice fires her mini-flaem thrower at the zombies legs making them collapse]
    [scooter discharges his weapons into the heads while adjusting in a fashion no one knew had in him]

    [Scooter fires his twin berettas with his arm out stretched on either side when being confronted by zombies on both sides]
    SCOOTER [obviously insane at this point of the bloodbath]: DIE AGAIN MOTHERFUCKERS! [crosses his arms to fire at oppsite directions to kill another pair of zombies]
    Janice: I’ll teach you to groove! [slashes one zombie through it’s torso and decapitates it and slashes off the front of anothers zombie’s face but enough to destroy it]
    [fozzie keeps firing off his shot gun knocking one down and stepping on it’s chest but not close enough for a bit]
    Fozzie: no lunch for you today! [shatters it’s rotted cranium til it’s just a thick red stain on the floor]
    [Fozzie stops to reload]
    Fozzie: Cover me Scooter!
    [scooter guards fozzie fireing off several rounds]
    Fozzie: I’m back now lets smoke those humorless bastards!

    Fozzie: GONZO! we’re all gettign together cept janice and tother forming a wall of fire you burn what’s left and disabled! SLASH AND BURN!
    Gonzo: Aye Aye Fuzzy One!
    Fozzie: FIRE!!!!!!!!!!!! [teh gang minus kermit, gonzo, dr. teeth and janice] form a bonbardment that none of hte zombies are left standing on the way to meet kermit.
    [zombies now suddenly sport cranianial pierings and ly bleedin gon teh floor from missing limbs]
    Fozzie: don’t step on them children! they’ll bite your fucking knee caps off! now move you furry bastards!
  5. Dr. Teeth: [Nudges Miss Piggy] Wake up Jimmy Dean we’re here

    [arriving at sesame street]

    The Gang Arrives In Sesame Street


    Kermit: Jeepers’s a ghost town

    Gonzo: They’re all gone :(

    Rolf: BERT! *sobs* i never told you i loved you! NO! NO! NO! i was trying to get hte courge to get you to ditch Ernie! NOW IT"S TOO LATE!

    Kermit: Well gang...looks like Sesame Street is done for......nothing but the undead..and blood on Oscars can and big bird decaptiated

    Gonzo: Bernice and i have figured out that a blunt trauma and or a gun shot to the head or fire can kill them....we had a lot of fun doing that didn’t we bernice

    Bernice: Buck buck bahk! [in the affirmative]

    Rolf: these cats do not know how to groove! it’s the same fucking moans over and over, those fuckers need to learn some rhythm!

    Dr. Teeth: If your’e dead i dont’ supose you know how to rock

    Rolf: I dont’ know baout you but I say we supply them with the beat of blungons and shot guns!

    Janice: yeah they are so ungroovy! and...why the fuck do i look like gyneth paltrow! you told me you wouldn’t me kermit look like that!
    Miss Piggy: Kermie you fucked Janice! you green son of a bitch!

    Kermit: You’re one to talk bitch your bacon juice is all over sesame street cocks!

    Scooter: guys guys guys! settle down! kill her later kermit we must destroy the living dead!

    Fozzie: Why did the zombie cross the...

    everyone turns: SHUT THE FUCK UP!

    [Scooter SCREAMS!]

    Kermit: Lets go gang!



    Fozzie: Yeaaaaaagh!!!!!!!!! Don’t eat me...i’m not beary good!

    [Zombie Is Knocked To The Side By A Blast From The Side]:

    Dr. Teeth: Good thing i took classes on firearms

    Janice: Lets Smoke This Ungroovy Fool!

    [to Jance’s shock, the zombies head splits appart before she fires. Janice looks up and sees a redder than usual Elmo, his fur matted in blood with a smoking shotgun]
    Elmo: Elmo been watching you, you sure know your way around that thing
    Janice: Cookie Monster used to say the samething! [sobs] he was always counted on for orgasms and cookies! He used to cum on teh cookies to make them extra special for me...
    Kemit: EWWWWWWWWWW! Janice learn to keep your slutage to yourself
    Janice: Fuck you! You weren’t complaining last time i sucked your green cock!

    Rolf: STOP IT YOU TWO! we need to work togther! save it til after we destroyed those undead sons of bitches! They killed bert!
    Scooter: He’s right, my uncle would have said the same thing, . What we now more than anything is to work together.
    Fozzie: What we need now is unite, and humor to lift our spirits. A good combination. The unity to fight them, and teh will to fight those bastards who stole my rubber chicken.
    Gonzo: they killed Cornelia!
    Scooter: you see we all have been affected by this, we need to work together or else we won’t survive
    Elmo: Elmo can help, Elmo want to join your team. Elmo seen this before, Elmo was in the Military once....

    [Flashback to the jungle]
    [Elmo stands in uniform with his fur shaved nearly down ot the skin]
    Elmo: Private Elmo reporting for duty!
    Guy Smilely: At ease, Private Elmo!
    [Elmo withdraws a cigarette from his case, handrolled from earlier]
    Sargent GS: Ever seen one of these?
    [SGS pulls a sheet back and reveals a restrained squirming writhing woman who looks like she’s been dead for a week]
    Elmo: Elmo seen them in the jungle, Elmo always wondered what the fuck was up with these people
    SGS: We’ve been trying to find a way to kill them as they have cannibalistically killing our officers
    Elmo: ELMO LUCKY!
    SGS: yes Elmo very lucky, as anyone who gets bitten dies and becomes one of them
    Elmo: How will Elmo kill one?
    SGS: We’ve tried all sorts of things, Cher’s Greatest Hits, chocolate, harsh language nothing works except this [without prior warning SGS withdraws his pistol and fires point blank startleing Elmo
    SGS that’s how you kill one
    [the wound starts bleeding out rainbows and little boils pop up that look like Sammy Davis Jr and appear to sing ot his music playing in the back ground as they twitch…]
    Kermit: what the hell, Elmo?!?!
    Elmo: Elmo was on drugs then and listened to a lot of Sammy Davis Jr.
  6. [exterior on the roof]

    [shoots his sniper rifle through the leg of the target]

    [camera shot: view through the sniper scope]

    Rosie O’Donnell: [weakly] Clang clang went the trollly....

    [dr. teeth shoots her again in the head]

    Kermit [who had just watched through bionoculars]: that was Rosie O’Donnell and she wasn’t a zombie

    Dr. Teeth: i know, i’ve just always wanted to kill that cunt

    the ammo load up scene:

    Fozzie: Shotguns?!
    Kermit: Check!
    Fozzie: Handgrenades?
    Kermit: Check!
    Fozzie: whoppie cushions?
    Kermit: What the fuck are you talking about?
    Fozzie: Naw Just fuckin with ya...Machete?

    Zombie onslaugh scene:
    [yeah...muppet limbs and gore!] and

    [miss piggy flies at kermit]
    Kermit: Take that you old swine! [impales miss piggy]
    Scooter: She wasn’t a zombie
    Kermit: I know, just wanted to get rid of the bitch

    Kermit: Oh hiddie ho there! theres Neil The Necophiliac!
    Neil: Hello! sorry you caught me with the missus!
    Kermit: I’ll let you finish up [turns around]
    Neil: Oh nothing much....OH FUCK! [is bitten by the missus!]
    Neil: mommy you’re alive!
    ["mommy" bites his head off]
    Kermit: NEIL!
    [Gonzo arrives in his zombie mobile]
    Gonzo: get in!
    Kermit: waht the fuck is going on!
    Gonzo: Ever since i saw that movie on late night tv..i knew this day was coming...ever since i saw Night Of The Living Bread

    so you know i am, it’s the opening)

    [exterior shot of Gonzo racing across town with CHICKS RULE! as a roof sticker]
    [dawn of the dead theme by goblin playing]
    Gonzo: I had seen this before....on i had to race out and save all my freinds!
    Kermit: awww that’s sweet! so i was first?
    Gonzo: no i just happened past the cemetery
    Kermit: WHAT?!
    [Gonzo turns down the Dawn of the Dead theme from his stereo]
    Gonzo: Never mind but we need to pick up everyone who isn’t already a zombie! Even Miss Piggy!
    Kermit: Why the fuck didn’t you just let her die!
    Gonzo: I’d just kill her later and bite into her than have her bite into me

    Gonzo: First Stop! Fozzies House!
    Bernice: [clucks in ackknowledgement of readyment and cocks her mini-shotgun]
    Gonzo: Bernice no you stay here
    Bernice: [clucks in disappointment]
    [Gonzo pulls over but keeps the engine running and Bernice opens the sliding van door]
    Gonzo: Kermit! you’ll need this! run and get fozzie! Be quick! I’ll stay here! GO!
    [kermit jolts out of the van as fast as his lil frog legs can go!]
    Kermit: Fozzie! Fozzie!
    Fozzie: HELP! these zombies lack a sense of humor my jokes aren’t working!
    Kermit: they dont’ work on anyone! [blows the zombies head off splattering brain over them and the wall from the blast]
    Fozzie: Kermit! if i had known you were coming out i would have baked you a cake!
    Kermit: No Time Fozzie! [grabs his hand and starts to run] Move your unfunny ass!
    Fozzie: AGH! my arm!
    [Kermit shoves fozzie into the van after Bernice opens it]
    Fozzie: what the fuck are those things they’re impervious to my jokes!
    Kermit: Gonzo seems to think that a shot to thehead kills them, and my experiment seemed to prove him right, so from now on, head-shots baby! STEP ON IT BLUE BITCH!

    [the van sceeches into the speed, just barley avoiding the cars both parked with doors opened and blood near by and hte ones doing the just hte say, needless to say this suprrises and impresses his crew]
    Fozzie [looking at the arsenal] : Holy rubber chickens! waht did you do rob a gun store?
    Gonzo: in a way, the prices were a fucking steal!
    Fozzie: tha’ts my line ya bastard!
    Gonzo: Next up is Miss Piggy!
    [gonzo swings into the drive way]
    [offers Fozzie and kermit a black hood]
    Gonzo: this is so i don’t look at the hog as you bring her in, bernice will show you in
    [Kermit and Fozzie exist and burst into the door guns drawn hoping to mistake miss piggy for a zombie]
    [MIss piggy comes into frame and is wearing too much make up to be mistaken for one]
    Miss Piggy: what took you fuckers so long! i may wanna look good when i die but i dont’ wanna die yet!
    Fozzie: they’d proabbly choke on you but i don’t wanna see you come back as a zombie
    [Kermit and fozzie cover her face with the hood which seems to be an Abu Ghraib replica]
    MIss PIggy: don’t censor moi! i’m beautiful!

    they quite roughly shove her intot he van after bernice opens the door for htem but fozzie only closes it partually wiht a barrell of a rifle sticking out]
    Gonzo: he’s on my last stop don’t worry! [tosses kermit his cell phone]
    [kermit knowing exactly what to do calls Robin]
    Robin: Uncle Kermit! i’m so scared!
    Kermit: I"m coming to get ya! hang tight! Me and the gang are coming to pick you up! Stay safe with the sitter before we can get there and barricade the doors! i cna’t stress it enough my tadling!
    Robin: we’re already doing it uncle kermit!
    Kermit: good boy! we’ll be there soon we’re working as fast as we can to save everyone
    Robin: i love you uncle kermit!
    Kermit: *sniff* i’ll be there soon hang tight!

    [Fozzie discharges his weapon]
    Fozzie: got ya!
    Kermit: Having fun over there?
    Fozzie: hells yea! Remember that time i wanted to do my William Tell act and you said no?
    Kermit: i was afriad you’d miss your mark even more with bullets than jokes]
    Fozzie: OVER HERE MISTER ZOMBIE! [blasts it’s head off]
    [kermit sits back and lights up a smoke while Fozzie plays gun, Gonzo drives, and miss piggy sleeps after they kncoked her pork ass out*
    Gonzo: Next stop Janice! [pulls over]
    [Kermit and Fozzie step out and rush and burst open the door]
    Both: Janice!
    Dr. Teeth’s Voice: dont’ you fuckers know how to knock!
    [they go into the bed room and find Janice riding Dr. Teeth]
    Janice: yeah knock we might be rockin!

    [janice gets off Dr. Teeth...revealing a huge glistening 10 incher]
    K&F: Ewww!
    Dr. Teeth: waht’d you expect to be in there? my spare change?
    [both of them are now getting dressed and and are both shirtless running out putting on their shirts as they run entering back into the van ]
    [K and F jump back in!]
    [Fozzie cocks his weapon as Gonzo pulls out of teh drive way]

    [Fozzie fires three rounds in sucession hitting 2 of the three targets]
    Dr. Teeth: Not bad!
    Fozzie: thanx
    Kermit: Gonzo, Scooter is with robin, next up is Rolf, he’s usualy playing at his bar at this point
    Gonzo: Considering the morning we’ve had i’m not so sure he’ll still be there
    Kermit: Fuck ’im if he’s not there, we can’t spend our time running around looking for people, just pick them up where we think they are
    Dr. Teeth: Jesus, you’re got enough to take down the Peoples Republic Of China over here!
    Gonzo: Yes it was all on sale!
    [Fozzie continues and fires]
    Gonzo: We’re here get out!
    Fozzie: I’ll do it!
    Dr. Teeth: I’m coming with you!
    [the armed pair exit the van and rush towards the opening]
    [the electricity is out so it’s dark and rolf is barely visable]
    Dr. Teeth: where are you dog!
    Rolf: Over here!
    [Fozzie Blindly Fires Into The Dark]
    [the bullet whizzes past Rolf]
    Rolf: watch where your’e pointing that thing!
    Fozzie: Sorry
    [Rolf hidding behind the bar pours the liquor over the counter and armed with a match and a fire estinguisher]
    Rolf: Behind the flames! Yell for me!
    [the pair rush over and stop]
    Dr. Teeth: we’re here lil doggie!
    [Rolf estinguishes the flames armed and hops over the counter armed with a couple Molatov cocktails as torches]
    Rolf: THIS WAY!
    [the now trio rushes out til two zombies find their way in front of them]
    Rolf: Waste those Yuppies!
    [the armed pair do as instructed before he even said anything]
    [they both rush out the door heading to the van but Rolf turns]
    [Rolf chucks teh malotov cocktails inside unexpectedly in just the right place for the building to burn]
    [Rolf heads to the van, thankful the boys wiated for him and watches the place go up into flames and a tear come down his eye.....]
    Dr. Teeth: you didn’t have to burn it down
    Rolf: I did...not sure if i’ll understand why but i had to, i will never regret it

    Gonzo: Hang on fuzzy monkeys!
    [Exterior Shot: Gonzo goes off a hill in teh air a lil and lands with a few sparks around the van!)
    Dr. Teeth: Damn!
    Gonzo: Fuck you! i’m trying to save your fucking lives and you bitch!
    Dr. Teeth: dont’ get me wrong i’m grateful, but i’d rather you not put our lives in greater risk than they already are, blueberry muffin.
    [Kermit continues to smoke his cigareete tapping the ash onto Gonzos floor looking intently at the fucked up world passing by literrally in the windows of Gonzo’s band]
    Janice: Hey dude! wheres you’re stash!
    Kermit: I don’t have a stash [never turning from his glance form the window]
    Janice: i should have known, you’re not giggling, i alwasy figured you were a pothead kermit guess i was wrong
    Kermit: I’m sick of peoples jokes...i’m not a part of a Green Party, fuck Ralph Nader, i’m a libertarian, i don’t smoke pot, it makes me freak out but i don’t care if hippie bitches like you smoke it [still staring out at the window]
    Janice: For a green due you sound pretty blue
    Kermit: i’m not a mood frog dammit

    Gonzo: we’re almost there, everyone reload all he weaponry, everything you can get our hands on...we need to have it all ready, casue we don’t know whats here.
    [Kermit reloads the handguns ]
    [miss piggy sleeps]
    [fozzie loads all the shotguns]
    [Dr. Teeth loads the rifles]
    [Janice Sets Up The Flame Throwers]
    [Rolf sets up the assualt weapons]
    all: ready!

    [gonzo pulls over the van and opens the door to find Scooter standing there with a torch]
    Scooter: I’m glad yo ufound you guys can we hitch a ride with y’all?
    Kermit: answer my mother fucking question first, you son of a bitch!
    Scooter: he’s with my Uncle as his guard we had to go to his Cafe!
    Kermit: we better get a move on it he’s not safe there!