Zombie Muppet Script Part 2

Published by Kermit in the blog Kermit's blog. Views: 25

Dr. Teeth: [Nudges Miss Piggy] Wake up Jimmy Dean we’re here





[arriving at sesame street]

The Gang Arrives In Sesame Street

[OSCARS TRASH CAN IS DOWN...ROLLING AROUND BLOOD INSIDE AND GREEN FUR...BIG BIRD’S CORPSE LIES DOWN WITH HIS HEAD LAYING BESIDE..TEHRE IS A SOUND OF WIND SHWOING HOW QUIET THINGS HAVE BECOME WITH THE SMELL OF DEATH FILLING HTE NOSTRILS OF THE GANG]

Kermit: Jeepers fellas...it’s a ghost town

Gonzo: They’re all gone :(

Rolf: BERT! *sobs* i never told you i loved you! NO! NO! NO! i was trying to get hte courge to get you to ditch Ernie! NOW IT"S TOO LATE!

Kermit: Well gang...looks like Sesame Street is done for......nothing but the undead..and blood on Oscars can and big bird decaptiated

Gonzo: Bernice and i have figured out that a blunt trauma and or a gun shot to the head or fire can kill them....we had a lot of fun doing that didn’t we bernice

Bernice: Buck buck bahk! [in the affirmative]

Rolf: these cats do not know how to groove! it’s the same fucking moans over and over, those fuckers need to learn some rhythm!

Dr. Teeth: If your’e dead i dont’ supose you know how to rock

Rolf: I dont’ know baout you but I say we supply them with the beat of blungons and shot guns!

Janice: yeah they are so ungroovy! and...why the fuck do i look like gyneth paltrow! you told me you wouldn’t me kermit look like that!
Miss Piggy: Kermie you fucked Janice! you green son of a bitch!

Kermit: You’re one to talk bitch your bacon juice is all over sesame street cocks!

Scooter: guys guys guys! settle down! kill her later kermit we must destroy the living dead!

Fozzie: Why did the zombie cross the...

everyone turns: SHUT THE FUCK UP!

[Scooter SCREAMS!]

Kermit: Lets go gang!

THEY FIND A ZOMBIE NIBBLING ON LINDA

ZOMBLE LUNGES FORWARD AT FOZZIE!

Fozzie: Yeaaaaaagh!!!!!!!!! Don’t eat me...i’m not beary good!

[Zombie Is Knocked To The Side By A Blast From The Side]:

Dr. Teeth: Good thing i took classes on firearms

Janice: Lets Smoke This Ungroovy Fool!

[to Jance’s shock, the zombies head splits appart before she fires. Janice looks up and sees a redder than usual Elmo, his fur matted in blood with a smoking shotgun]
Elmo: Elmo been watching you, you sure know your way around that thing
Janice: Cookie Monster used to say the samething! [sobs] he was always counted on for orgasms and cookies! He used to cum on teh cookies to make them extra special for me...
Kemit: EWWWWWWWWWW! Janice learn to keep your slutage to yourself
Janice: Fuck you! You weren’t complaining last time i sucked your green cock!

Rolf: STOP IT YOU TWO! we need to work togther! save it til after we destroyed those undead sons of bitches! They killed bert!
Scooter: He’s right, my uncle would have said the same thing, . What we now more than anything is to work together.
Fozzie: What we need now is unite, and humor to lift our spirits. A good combination. The unity to fight them, and teh will to fight those bastards who stole my rubber chicken.
Gonzo: they killed Cornelia!
Scooter: you see we all have been affected by this, we need to work together or else we won’t survive
Elmo: Elmo can help, Elmo want to join your team. Elmo seen this before, Elmo was in the Military once....

[Flashback to the jungle]
[Elmo stands in uniform with his fur shaved nearly down ot the skin]
Elmo: Private Elmo reporting for duty!
Guy Smilely: At ease, Private Elmo!
[Elmo withdraws a cigarette from his case, handrolled from earlier]
Sargent GS: Ever seen one of these?
[SGS pulls a sheet back and reveals a restrained squirming writhing woman who looks like she’s been dead for a week]
Elmo: Elmo seen them in the jungle, Elmo always wondered what the fuck was up with these people
SGS: We’ve been trying to find a way to kill them as they have cannibalistically killing our officers
Elmo: ELMO LUCKY!
SGS: yes Elmo very lucky, as anyone who gets bitten dies and becomes one of them
Elmo: How will Elmo kill one?
SGS: We’ve tried all sorts of things, Cher’s Greatest Hits, chocolate, harsh language nothing works except this [without prior warning SGS withdraws his pistol and fires point blank startleing Elmo
SGS that’s how you kill one
[the wound starts bleeding out rainbows and little boils pop up that look like Sammy Davis Jr and appear to sing ot his music playing in the back ground as they twitch…]
Kermit: what the hell, Elmo?!?!
Elmo: Elmo was on drugs then and listened to a lot of Sammy Davis Jr.
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