I sent this to a friend of mine:
I fell in a very deep love with a girl I knew for two years. I was hesitant, but we had sex after she practically begged for it for several months. She wanted me to ejaculate in her. I was drunk. I did so. She spent the remainder of the night in my arms and all of the following morning. She told me she loved me. I believed her. We were cute for two days then she begins ignoring me.
She was pregnant. I was zealous. I adored the idea of us creating a human together. She was taken aback when I shared my sentiment. She aborted the kid at one month. I was irked. I finally visited her last night and she told me that she didn't want me and thus I was discarded.
Then I wrote her the following:
It wasn't directly about the sex. I just wanted you to do something I said; as in obedience. Yeah sure I've been that way in the past, but you aborting what I presume to be your child and mine, the constant binge drinking and pill popping, etc basically let me know that I wasn't wanted and probably haven't been for a while. Regardless if you only felt that I was just supposed to be a couple nights stand you should have been upfront with that. Now the pain and anger still resounds within me. Like I said before " I'm human garbage." You're M.O. is to usually tell me that you love me after passing out in your car. If you're tired of apologizing-- good, because it means very little to me and I got tired of seeing it. It was a matter of principle. I dislike the way you live. You obviously don't care. Why have sex? Why hold hands? Why kiss? Why even exist in each others lives if you can't remember who you slept by the night before. Maybe your mother should get custody of you. You want to change me into you. That will never happen. Drugs and alcohol are fine in moderation, but at your rate... blowing a 1.15... That's just self abuse. I do not want to be coerced into changing. I have my own pace which is, apparently, too slow for you. In fact I might not even change. As I don't feel the need to. You should accept me for who I am. I believe I do a well enough job of accepting whatever it is that is you.
If you want someone more like go find him/her. I don't want to have meaningless sex or spend time with or around someone who can't remember my first name when she's drunk. I'm over this this shit, (persons name). And I'm over you.
Jake_or likes this.
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