Funny as i dig into this process of finding out why my sex is not working my body responds. I am really feeling and being aware in relation to anything sexual that appears: lust, stimulations, turnons etc. And i am further meditating 20 min every day. primarily on breath body feel not sex focus - whatever emerges. And so it does
First - the fog
appeared right after i made my first blog post. Like i distanced myself from what i was writing. like a layer of thick fog came between me and the writings/thoughts. Hard to focus on it and my mind seemed unable to collect around it.
Second - the inner tight resistance/grip
today i masturbated and found out that im kindof split in 2. My body sensations vs my mind. It was like my mind was turned on but my inside and bodyfeel was locked down. super passive and very attentive. In short this locks down my body and i have to squeeze my orgasm through. needless to say its not a great orgasm but its there. anyways very interesting to find this inner resistance energy. will try to connect with it and be more aware of it as it seem to close down my system - an autoreaction!
Anyone tried something like this?
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