I didn't want to bore people too much in my intro posting so I thought I'd reveal a little about myself as a blog post, and let people read it if they will. If you wish, leave a comment or critique, as I enjoy a good discussion on all kinds of topics (I'm a pretty good BSer:eyes).
To begin with, I like to write, and hate just plunking down a one line answer or response. If you find I'm too long winded, sorry. Just speed read. I like to stretch my thinking in all kinds of ways, and find myself playing devil's advocate fairly often. This requires me to think longer about the subject at hand, and possibly allows for a better understanding of the bigger picture. I'm very new at being on a sex forum, however, so if I step on anyone's feelings, it's not intentional, unless I specifically say so:lol!
I try to approach life with an empty glass; if I start with a full glass, there's no room to add new things. I can be a voracious reader, if something piques my curiosity, and can get lost for hours on the web following link after link on topics that I hadn't ever thought about before. This can be fun, but has the consequences of spending time I should be utilizing for other things (like right now; I should be sleeping!), and filling my head with "useless" clutter (but I still suck at Trivial Pursuit!).
As I said above, I like to write, both on topics of interest and creatively. I have written and published (obscurely) a bit of poetry, and try to write short fiction as well. I have several short erotic stories in the works, and, who knows, I may actually finish one and post it here. I also enjoy drawing, painting, and sculpture, though I have not taken the time to pursue this area of my life to the extent I would like. In the past, I enjoyed a "hobby career," if you will, acting in community theatre, having been involved in over thirty plays and musicals. I've mascaraed as a woman, an "over the hill" 30ish gay actor, and a "nun," as well as appearing in nothing more than an almost ripped off towel (oh how my mother laughed, and laughed, and laughed!), just for a few examples.
My sexual history is pretty mundane in that I've not had many partners, or pursued too many fantasies. But oh what fantasies! Obviously, I'm pretty creative, and a rich sexual fantasy life seems to be part of that package. As I've grown older, I've outgrown some of the taboos of a typical Midwestern Christian upbringing, but it is a process that continues to this day. My current Love is also a new member here (RideNaked2), and I refer to her as "R" rather than use the "SO" or "GF" monikers that I detest (just how does one get over the awkwardness of introducing one's SO?). We've been together for 10 years:eek, and had our share of ups and downs. Our relationship began with finding each other on an adult friends website (Find somebody to fuck TONIGHT! Yeah, right.), so some of the "ice" was broken before we even met. I was a year plus out of an unfulfilling LTR, and determined that at least some of my sexual preferences be out on the table at the very beginning. We've been pretty good about that aspect of our relationship so far, and it's one reason we both popped on here.
So, to the heart of the matter. Sex, and how I like it! I'm straight, but very curious about an oral experience with another guy (more on that in a later blog entry...). I tend to play a lot; a "quickie" would need lots of buildup to be very satisfying for me, I think. I'm into the "why" of things; sex definitely has a cerebral component for me. Like most guys, I'm visually stimulated, so porn is good, but I prefer smaller doses drawn out over a long period of time. This is most likely why I've found Ds, bondage, and CBT so alluring. Physical restraint combined with psychological stimulation/arousal/denial just makes me go nuts! Pain has it's place for me, as well, not so much giving as receiving.
I get turned on by both the Dom and sub aspects of Ds, but lean more toward the sub side of the spectrum. The thing is, though, that I've not experienced a true Ds session first hand, with someone experienced enough to really take charge and test my limits. R tries, but has a difficult time overcoming her own insecurities and fear of hurting me. We obviously role play, but the very real dynamics of a true Ds session are lacking. That's fine, and if it never goes beyond that, I can live with it. But, I hope for the day when I come home to a note on the door commanding me to remove all my clothes, bind my cock and balls with the provided harness, then kneel and wait by the door until she sees fit to allow me to enter...
Several things have transpired in the past year that have brought us to this site. I had my own business, with R, and, well, failed, due to many factors out of our control. The dynamics of the business caused each of us a lot of stress, and we suffered a real failure to communicate, which bled over into our personal relationship. As our situation has changed for the better, we've committed ourselves to repairing and strengthening our relationship. If nothing else, reading through the threads and discussing ideas between us has been quite stimulating (not to mention tiring), and we hope to grow together as we continue on our journey...
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