Viewing blog entries in category: My Bipolar Life
I was manic over the weekend. I made a mistake and projected some anger and frustration on someone. I had to fix it. Thankfully, M was understanding. I almost never do that when I'm face to face with someone. I guess its the impersonality of the web. Mania is as bad as the depression, in its on way. :eyes
The cat is STILL throwing up! Went by the vets and he suggested another food. It costs $30 for a 10 oz bag, and the wet is $2 for a little bitty can. Oh well, she doesn't eat nearly as much as the boys did. I miss them. Maybe in a year we'll get another dog, or dogs. I kind of like having two. I don't miss the yard patrol.
I looked at Emily's posts today. I don't know why. I guess, even after all that's happened, I miss her. Well, she is my daughter. I guess her outrageous post got me thinking. She's going to South Carolina with the guy she's with. It appears this one has stuck around for four months. Maybe there's hope. I don't know how long she'll be there. I may comment on her post and see if she'll talk to me.
I'm still worried about my patient. She's not responding to her medication or therapy and it's been a month now. We should see some progress. I emailed her psychiatrist to get an update on her meds. I hope she really is taking them, as she said she is. I hope she doesn't suicide. I need to be careful she doesn't form an attachment to me. That would just make everything worse. It's always a concern with any of them. I haven't seen a rise in appointments, or emergency calls yet. I'm sure it will come as we get closer to the holidays.
Mom is really slowing down. Michael and I noticed it Sunday, more than we have before. She's still functioning, but her mind is not as sharp. I suppose it's just a matter of her age. We'll have to keep an eye on her. I'm concerned that she's still driving, but Michael doesn't think it's a concern. I'm afraid that he might see the drop like I do, since he talks to her every day. It's hell getting old.
Silverette will be home soon. I'm feeling like going out for Italian tonight. I think I'll have a drink, and see if she wants to.
I'm feeling better today, not so sick. My mental state is almost normal. I'm thinking that after dinner, I'm going to make Silverette cum.
Getting by with bipolar disorder
I’ve equalized on my meds and I’m feeling better. Some days I feel so tired. The depression creeps up behind my mind and overwhelms me. It doesn’t help that those around me keep asking “Why are you feeling depressed? Aren’t you taking your pills”. Fuck, its like they think the meds are going to take away all the symptoms. Then they walk around me on egg shells. I keep telling them I'm Bipolar. I always will be. They just don't understand that I'll be this way the rest of my life. That I have to be aware of my mental state every day, never giving up. I don't get why they think someone in my profession doesn't know what to do. It gets tiring. Only my wife understands. She knows to just let me be. Except for sex. She knows if she can get me to cum, I'll feel better. She always knows.
I found a new website forum that is focused on sex. I’ve been having a good time. Making some cyber friends. It's nice. I can talk about sex and be completely myself. No acting the professional all the time. Thank the massive black hole at the center of the universe for anonymity.
Bye for now.