Young Marriage?

Discussion in 'Sex and Relationships' started by jódame, Feb 3, 2007.

  1. jódame

    jódame New Member

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    What's the general concensus on marrying young? How long do you think two people should be together before they get married?
     
  2. SexyScorp

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    There is no rule because everyone is different

    I married my first husband (ive had three so far) at aged 20...it was a ridiculous move and ended up in a very traumatic divorce..

    The second was when i was 30..still too young for me...

    And the third when I was 39...still too young for me :lol

    Hmmm...marriage...everyone (or most) seem to want to enter into it, but like other 'institutions" it aint all fun..

    I bet if there was no such thing as divorce,more couples would think long and hard about it.

    I married for the wrong reasons and if I am totally hones, I would rather be the lover than the wife...

    Women often get treated better that way...

    Good luck...dont let my cynicism deter what is right for you
     
  3. The Mistress

    The Mistress New Member

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    I'm sorta against marriage too....especially a young marriage. :coocoo

    And I couldn't agree w/this statement more...
    :bow
     
  4. SexyScorp

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    :bow

    back at thee Mistress

    I hate to sound so cynical, but its a sad fact that most of the married women I meet arent too happy...of course there is the odd exception..thankfully

    "Lovers forever...face to face
    My city or mountains
    Stay with me stay
    I need you to love me
    I need you today
    Give to me your leather...
    Take from me...my lace"
     
  5. pirouette

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    My husband and I married after dating for one year. We've been married 15 years. Neither of us is mainstream. And our ideals differ greatly from the norm. So our marriage really rocks because we're both weird! :lol We are DEFINATELY the exception to the rule.
     
  6. The Mistress

    The Mistress New Member

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    I realize I sound cynical too....but the fact is....I am.

    Most of my married friends envy my life and tell me they if they could do it all over again.....:woohoo

    I have many rules I live by....these are just a few...
    You may come by, you may visit often, you may buy me gifts, you may take me to exotic places, but you aren't living here, and we aren't sharing bank accounts. :p
     
  7. SexyScorp

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    Aaahhh that is great to here pirouette...I saw your photo .... lovely and bohemian you look

    Do you have children?

    And I feel a little hesitant to ask this....are ye faithful to each other...(pls dont answer unless you feel at liberty)

    I am asking to gain insight into our ever changing state of consciousness...the age of aquarius and all that

    Thanks
    x
     
  8. pirouette

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    Thanks for your generous compliment. Children? None living unfortunately. Are we faithful? Yes.......we don't sleep with other people. But we do play! We are 100% open about our thoughts and desires. Even though we agreed to swing a long time ago, neither of us has met anyone to bring home. Both of our professions deal with sensuality to a degree so we are more relaxed than the average couple anyway.
    I can tell you this....neither of us can sleep if we aren't together. Sounds sweet but can be dreadful when we seperate for short periods of time.
    And I must agree with Mistress on this one. We didn't have a joint account until about 6 years ago. And we still have several seperate accounts.
     
  9. loybu

    loybu New Member

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    i was 22 when i got married.. but we still rock!! its how you handle it.. btw we were for 6 years before we got married
     
  10. jódame

    jódame New Member

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    Pirouette, I just want to say that "neither of us can sleep if we aren't together" is probably the sweetest and most affirming thing I've ever heard anyone say. Your relationship is what I want mine to be. :) Congratulations!
     
  11. Rose

    Rose Resident Sexy Grandma
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    Some people can date for 10+ years or a few months... get married.... and it ends up disastrous. I think it has to do with maturity - whether each person has grown up within themselves FIRST. Age does not always indicate one's maturity level.

    Also, as a young married couple determines to spend quality time together, they tend to grow in the same direction. If they are always going separate ways, that can be an indicator that they are not true 'soul mates', and are drifting apart. It will either end in divorce, or two people living under one roof in a type of 'utilitarian' relationship. Either way, it sux.

    I was 23 when I married Thorn. We had dated less than a year when we said "I do".
    And "We did"! Three kids (all married now).

    I am his wife forever.
    I am his lover forever.
    He buys me gifts.
    He takes me to exotic places.
    We have never had separate bank accounts. Never.

    *Funny - wherever we go, our single/divorced (and even many married) friends envy us. They've flat out told us they wish they could find what we seemed to have just 'fallen into'.* ;)
     
  12. bighiker2003

    bighiker2003 Banned

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    Rose said:
    I have never been divorced either, just one wife forever.
    But we didn't just fall into it as Rose said, We work at it.:sf
     
  13. Elvis

    Elvis Member

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    Mrs E Nº 2 and I lived together for 30 years before we got married and we're here for the duration.

    Mrs E Nº 1 made do with me for 7 years before she threw me out, we married when I was 22 and she was nearly 21.

    We know people who married young and are still together, but the majority have divorced.
    It's a lottery.
     
  14. SexyScorp

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    I just think the monogamy thing could be hard .... for people to keep their marriage vows...foresaking all others etc...

    Dont seem the point in taking that vow if you are gonna break it...its like lieing to each other. I did that twice...broke my marriage vow...sort of made my a hypocrite really. I hate lies and yet I suppose I made a sham of both those marriages...oh well I am not perfect..

    I am with my present husband for 18 years and never been with another physically ... but there is no guarantee of that remaining is there? If I fell in love with another, I am not sure I could stay faithful...

    Aaaaahhhh its a complex thing marriage...people can go into and then wanna break all the rules..

    hahahaha....life hey?
     
  15. SexyScorp

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    I remember my father saying once how if a couple stay together, they must be compatible....

    Oh Dad..how naive you are, I remember thinking.

    In their day it was okay for everything to appear fine and dandy on the outside as long as you didnt let the mask slip...

    A lot of those blokes (and women) were off shagging anything that moves...but as long as it was kept hidden then that was okay.

    When I told my parents that I was about to divorce hubbie no 2, there was an uproar. Of course, if I and he had been off shagging anything that moved...but nobody knew...that would have been okay...as LONG as we stayed together (and despite the fact that we may have been as miserable as fuck together)

    Oh dear...what a mockery....what a load of old bullshit that is...

    Rant Over :)

    lol!!!
     
  16. Rose

    Rose Resident Sexy Grandma
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    Good point, Hiker, and you are so very right! I should have clarified that. :ugh Without going into detail, our friends seem to think we make it look so easy - but it takes determination and commitment, and sometimes just the ability to 'bite the bullet' till the good times roll again!

    Thanks for pointing that out! :tup
     
  17. SexyScorp

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    lovely Irish Rosie....

    i admire your attitude, really I do....

    you and your man are an inspiration...

    i must seem very cynical in comparison...

    maybe I ask for too much?



    *sigh"
     
  18. Rose

    Rose Resident Sexy Grandma
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    Not at all, hun. Like Elvis said, sometimes it seems like a lottery - with one exception: We all have the ability to make our "odds" more favorable.

    Thorn is 58, I am 52. I could not imagine being alone at this stage in my life - or being in a relationship that has not had the time to solidify before going into the era of possible sicknesses; i.e. strokes, hospitalizations, etc. When I look across the table, and see him - - I know I will never be alone, nor will he. I will never be without love and caring and compassion. Regardless of what the future holds, we will be there for each other.

    When one gets to be our age, that's an incredibly romantic and sensual part of our marriage.
     
  19. SexyScorp

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    I was looking for a heart icon...couldnt find one

    Oh Rosie.....<3
     
  20. kinkyk8

    kinkyk8 New Member

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    I have been married for 10 yrs - we got married aftre being together 16 months. It has to be worked at but luckily it has more ups than downs. Couldn't imagine myself without him.