I worked my fucking ass off today, but that always makes me feel good, getting stuff done. We sat around shooting the shit after the jobs were all done, at least for today, tired, thirsty, cracking some brews and some jokes, teasing, trading familiar and affectionate insults, the people I need, the folks who help me get it all done. But you weren't there. Time finally came for everyone to head off to where they belong, loved ones, dinner, kids, home. I headed for the hammock, 3 or 4 beers in me, a little buzzed, relaxed and happy, just literally drinking in the warm dry air, with a few cool hints of fall, relishing the breeze as the sun worked towards the horizon, old reliable. I set it up in the pines because they make me the happiest. Pine trees. God, can heaven really compare? Maybe so? Because you weren't there. The dry and the warmth and the cool and the sun and the pine and the beers and the rocking of the hammock worked their magic on me and my mind wandered, thoughts drifting, so deeply, deeply content. I started to think of you. One of the kittens broke that thought in a burst of curiosity. How old now, four? Five months? "Well, pal, you're more than welcome but you gotta want to get up here!" Sure enough, clawing at the edge, struggling just a bit and, whoosh, in a flash, that kitten burst of energy, he's in my lap, walking around on my chest, licking my face, seeing what I am up to, the epitome of living joy; a damn kitten! Could he possibly be happier than I am? It crosses my mind, in that relaxed random thought way, that kittens and cats for that matter, never get up here unless one of their humans is laying here. A ha, I realize, the cross hatch of the weaving. No stable footing! Warm...he's purring as he finds a suitable spot. Does he also recognize just how beautiful the world is this evening? Does he have a clue that something is missing? After all, he doesn't seem to notice that you're not there. I do. The smell of your hair, your perfume, your skin, could I handle any more sensations or would my mind just shut down from overload? I'd like to find out just now. I laugh, chuckling really, doing inventory; 6' 2", 240#'s of dirty, sweaty, tipsy, sore, rocking in a hammock, the sun partially blocked by a branch, but it let's me see the sun actually move and I can feel it's warmth on my eyes through my mirrored Joe Cool shades, just relishing being alive, with a kitten nestling in my lap! Huh. How can the sky be so blue? And you're still not there. Now, I'm really getting interested in you because here I am, nearly comatose from the blissful surroundings that are my life yet I keep drifting to you and I haven't even met you yet! What does you hair smell like? Your perfume? What about your body? I have a picture imagined. God, your curves, how you carry yourself...mmmm. Can I hear your voice? See your smile? Smile into your eyes as we kiss? Now, that random thought comes rolling in again, this time bursting in, kinda rude and urgent. My mind runs off to Rube Goldberg land imagining some mechanics garage contraption that would allow me to be under you, under the hammock yet able to arch up and into you and make love through the netting, your back to my chest. I couldn't get my hands on your breasts I calculate in my thoughts, but my fingers could hold tight through the web and at least touch you. Your hair might find it's way down to me. You could only touch me just a bit as well, but, still, I'm in you, you fuck back into me. OK, NOW we're in heaven! Of course, before this point, kitty has run off in annoyance to rest somewhere else. Maybe watch? 'WTF' he must be thinking. I laugh again. He's gone but he was here and you, in reality, for sure still not here. Never were. I get up to go take a beer pizz, romantic that I am, then climb on my four wheeler and go burn some hills, chasing the sun, the warmth, clearing my head. You're still not here but you will be, some day. Some day when EVERYTHING is right. And then we'll fuck like pigs and I'll jerk off all over you and we'll both like it! :dgrin Gotta have a happy ending.