You want me to do WHAT?

Discussion in 'General Sex Discussion' started by BinghamtonNY, Oct 4, 2008.

  1. BinghamtonNY

    BinghamtonNY Member

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    Everyone has a sexual threshold. There are some things that they just won't consider doing. As we move from the missionary position to the outer fringes of the sex act spectrum, we have fewer and fewer folks who are willing to come along for the ride.

    The popularity of facials as the culmination of pornography scenes has soared in the past decade, yet, outside the porn arena, "facial" is not mainstream enough to be considered a household sex term. Many women are still resistant to giving men the liberty of ejaculating on their face. And, by all means, women have every right to avoid sexual behaviors that they find uncomfortable.

    However, there appears to be quite a degree of variation in which sex acts folks will not consider trying. Sometimes I'm left wondering when my wife will, on rare occasions, be okay with my ejaculating on her face. However, in 9+ years of marriage and 3 yrs of dating, she has never allowed me to ejaculate in her mouth. It seems that more women will take it in the mouth, rather than on the face.

    Does anyone have a situation with their spouse of S.O. that is similar in this sense?
     
  2. Dreama

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    I'd like to consider myself a pretty sexually liberated lady. But, having jizz on my face is not something I enjoy. It can get in your eyes, it's a bitch to clean off, plus, I don't get anything out of it...it's more unpleasant than anything else. I'm glad my SO isn't really into that, because it's just not my thing. If your wife has boundaries, respect them. At least she's still having sex with you. I've heard of men on this very forum who don't have that luxury.
     
  3. Wckd_Beauty

    Wckd_Beauty New Member

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    Instead of trying and seeing if she'll like it, ask her about it and talk to her. Most porn dramatizes a situation, like the film industry is supposed to. There are a couple guys who do cum on their partners faces, but the majority of it is either on the chest, stomach, or back.

    Personally, i'd rather my boyfriend cum on my stomach/chest than my face, and as her husband respecting her wishes is what a relationship should have. As Dreama said:

     
  4. BassDude

    BassDude New Member

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    Dude...sounds like you need to stop watching porn and spend more time talking and connecting with your wife. ;) I don't blame any woman for not wanting jizz on her face...I wouldn't either. Would you want jizz on your face? If not, why would you expect your wife to allow it? (I don't mean to sound judgemental here OK? I really don't like seeing women demeaned in porn, and I guess I personally think that cumming on a woman's face is a little demeaning to her, unless it's something she actually gets off on.)

    If I may suggest, why don't you back up, talk with your wife gently about your sex life, get her to feel comfortable and open up to you, and see what she might like to try rather than lamenting that she won't do something you've seen in a porn video. Sex is something for both of you to enjoy, not just for you to enjoy. She might surprise the hell out of you (IF you are gentle and caring enough to get her to open up to you), and you might find yourself doing some things that are much more fun and erotic than you cumming on her face.

    BD
     
    #4 BassDude, Oct 4, 2008
    Last edited: Oct 4, 2008
  5. BinghamtonNY

    BinghamtonNY Member

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    I can't blame her for that. :lol:lol:lol:lol:lol:lol:lol
     
  6. cbrmale

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    You have been watching too much porn. I have never had the desire to come over my wife, and I doubt if she would get much pleasure from me doing so. I also don't consider sex beyond the missionary position as outer fringes of behaviour either, although in the early days of our marriage my wife had a few too many boundaries for my liking. To resolve this, I hired and we watched a series of video tapes (as they were then) from the Sinclair institute. They were about ordinary couples talking about and then showing us their sex lives. They were extraordinarily good, and gave my wife the emotional green light to explore. It's fair to say that she changed overnight.

    However, you won't see facials on Sinclair institute DVDs. But if you are desiring to explore beyond this genre, and you wife is agreeable (this is a must), then ask if she's interested in viewing some DVDs that should help both of you to come up with interesting variations on sex to try out together.
     
  7. BinghamtonNY

    BinghamtonNY Member

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    We do watch porn DVD's though not too much IMO. A couple times a month. Some would say any porn is too much. But it's always best to respect others opinions. We have sex 4-6 times weekly on average. But with young kids, of course that figure varies! It's safe to say too much is, in most instances, a relative and highly individualized term. You are right in that we do get new ideas for positions from the DVD's we view together.

    Glad to hear you and your wife have explored new sexual ideas and that she's opened up (pun intended? I dunno. ;) ). I'd definitely consider we check out those Sinclair DVD's to further enhance our relationship and sex life.
     
  8. BassDude

    BassDude New Member

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    Well, I wouldn't say that. I'm not an addicted porn junkie, but then I do enjoy it and don't think it's anything wrong personally. Along with things like toys, strip bars, erotic stories, this web site :brow, cyber-sex, etc., I think it kinda falls under "arousal or masturbation aids". Just don't think that much of what you see in porn is realistic, because most of it isn't. It's acting...it may be erotic acting, but it's still acting. ;)

    And just as a thought, why don't you try finding some porn that she might really like? Help her figure out what some of her kinks might be. That can be a quite fun process for both of you!

    Cheers,
    BD
     
  9. BinghamtonNY

    BinghamtonNY Member

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    My friend, that is the key. Whether or not the porn turns on me is a moot point. As long as it turns on her. Then the rest is all good!

    But as I bet you're well aware, what turns her on today, may not work tomorrow. And I thought the weatherman had a tough job! ;)
     
  10. johnnyangel694u

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    I am sorry and don't mean to be a pain in the ass but.............
    No where did I read that BinghamtonNY wanted to know what he was doing wrong.
    He asked this one very specific question.

    Does anyone have a situation with their spouse of S.O. that is similar in this sense?
     
  11. BinghamtonNY

    BinghamtonNY Member

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    Thank you for that clarification, Johnnyangel. As you stated, I was interested if anyone had a "similar situation". My question was not intended to be ejaculo-centric, though a couple individuals seemed to take it that way and run with it. Oh well. I was simply wondering if anyone noticed variations in what's taboo for them or others they know with respect to run-of-the-mills taboos in social norms.

    Typing online --- it's not always easy to be as clear as in person. Sorry for perhaps not explaining so well.
     
  12. Dreama

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    Well, I think whatever you include in your post is up for comment, because it's a public forum. But as per your question? No, we don't ave a situation that was similar, but we would have a huge problem if hubby was going to jizz on my face. Lol
     
  13. L.A.X.

    L.A.X. New Member

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    I'm very lucky to have a girl that actually loves me cumming on her face.......its perfect for me as I really enjoy dishing out facials.
     
  14. FlirtyChick

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    It seems like she won't and it seems that you think that is ok. I would rather take it in the mouth, on my back, on my belly, than on my face. Then again, I have never been asked to take it on the face, but I don't see the point. Mainly, I applaud you for NOT demanding that she do it, and for saying this: "by all means, women have every right to avoid sexual behaviors that they find uncomfortable." I don't think you watch too much porn, and I don't see where you are trying to make your wife do something she doesn't like. I think facials in porn are for dramatic effect, and I do think that anyone that thinks everyday sex is akin to professional porn is delusional. Now, let me play :dgrin:dgrin's advocate: What sexual satisfaction would YOU gain by loading your wife's face??? :)
     
  15. fiona

    fiona New Member

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    Only in the last year of my now 15 year marriage have I realized that I do enjoy getting a Facial from my husband, but I've never had it all over my face though. I like to kneel in front of him and watch as he cums so it usually hits my chest. Occasionally it gets my chin and that's ok. Like I read before, I wouldn't like to get it in my eyes or nose and I tend to gag if it shoots into my mouth....lol and that's not too good for either of us.
     
  16. eandvk

    eandvk Member

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    My wife lets me cum in her mouth, she didnt when we first met but as we grew as a couple and sex partners, she started to finish me orally.....as for facials...I know she wouldnt enjoy it and I never have wanted to do that to my wife or any previous woman Ive been with....when we watch porn and those shots are played, its the FF button for both of us....
     
  17. BassDude

    BassDude New Member

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    Bing...I apologize if I misread your question. It's just so common to see guys pressuring their wives to do things that they don't want (like facials, anal, etc.), I may have made some invalid assumptions. Sorry if I did!

    And yes, what's "taboo" is different from person to person. If you are the less inhibited partner, then I think you have to determine what are the things that your more inhibited partner would never do, and things she might be curious about or open to, but is a little afraid to just say so. In other words, make her feel "safe" in telling you about anything that she might be curious about or open to. (And the more comfortable she gets with things she's curious about, the more likely she is to become curious about some things she's said she'd never do, and maybe decided to try some of those too.)

    For instance, my wife and I occasionally used toys together for a long time, even before we were married. She showed a renewed interest in toys a couple years ago, so I got her a couple that rock her world, but we still used them together. I finally convinced her that it's perfectly OK with me if she goes upstairs and hits the toys all by herself...it took me giving quite a bit of reassurance to her for her to feel comfortable doing that, but I did my best to make her feel safe in that it's perfectly OK with me, it's just a sex toy, and it's fine for us to use them together or for her to use them for solo time! It's all good.

    I've created a monsta'...we now buy batteries by the pallet. (Just kidding! ;)) Seriously, she can cum about 5-10 times per day more than I can...why should she have to sit and wait for me when there's perfectly good toys waiting upstairs! :lol

    BD
     
    #17 BassDude, Oct 6, 2008
    Last edited: Oct 6, 2008