Writing like someone who's never had sex.

Discussion in 'Erotic Literature' started by fireontheside, Apr 14, 2013.

  1. fireontheside

    fireontheside Member

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    I have a crush on this guy from a TV show I watch, and I wrote something rather sexual about him the other day, describing what I wished I could do to him. But somehow my prose just seemed weird, or off.

    But I'm wondering, do I write like a virgin? Is there a marked difference between the writing of someone who's had sex and someone who hasn't? Like, I can't truly know because I've never done it, so I can't write it?

    I think probably not, it depends on the skill of the writer. Then again, most writers have had sex, and not having sex goes along with being very young and not that mature which makes for a not as good writer. Since I'm older, I wonder if I have limitations where this is concerned...
     
  2. Meee

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    I've read some pretty bad erotic scenes by published writers who have wives and children, therefore supposedly having some experience. Clumsy action, dull sensuality, and a poor understanding of anatomy--it makes me wonder how they got their wives pregnant, and it makes me doubt that their wives enjoyed it.

    You might try acknowledging your virginity right in your writing. You might not know what it's like from experience, but you can still desire to do it with that guy. Write about your desire. Write about how the mystery makes your yearning stronger, and how it would make your encounter even more intense. Write about your experience with him as exploration and discovery. Then, of course, post it here. :brow
     
    #2 Meee, Apr 14, 2013
    Last edited: Apr 14, 2013
  3. lbushwalker

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    Imagination the genesis of all things wonderful :)
     
  4. mrcock

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    absolutely no

    :lol
     
  5. HStein

    HStein Member

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    Why don't you post it here and let us read it first hand. We'd love to give you direct feedback.
     
  6. fireontheside

    fireontheside Member

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    Honestly I don't quite feel comfortable because it deals with a lot of really difficult subject matter. It's hard to explain but I don't feel comfortable posting it. Maybe I can post some small part of it at some point, but not just now.
     
  7. fireontheside

    fireontheside Member

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    Okay, I broke down. Here is a small part of it.

    So…to elaborate on aforementioned sweet spot, perhaps it could be thought of as a sort of a…clitoris. Of my mind. An area of intense pleasure that only some people can reach. Very few men can but ohhhh god he does for sure.

    He must have known when he was himself, showing vulnerability, that so many people would fall hopelessly in love with him. He had to know.

    I wonder how he feels about all the women obsessed with him now. At least I don’t have to go home to a fat, disgusting husband and wish he was lying next to me instead of some disgusting slob like other less fortunate women do.

    On his instagram page I saw this woman who said to him, “Marry me.” I looked at her profile and she had two kids. She probably also had a husband who was anything but pleasing her. Meanwhile she finds this man who is well dressed, well spoken, talented, funny, sexy, and everything that anyone could ever want in a man.



    I should clarify that I wonder how he feels about all the women obsessed with him because he is not attracted to women. Not that it matters, I guess, but does he find it annoying, weird, confusing, all that stuff. Just me speculating about his impression of it.
     
  8. redics_girl

    redics_girl Active Member

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    actually, that's pretty good. more? its a different take on writing, and that in itself makes it interesting.
     
  9. fireontheside

    fireontheside Member

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    Thanks. I'm hesitant to post more, but maybe when I add more entries to my tumblr. I hestitate to post any of the dirtier stuff, just because I'm not all that confident with that.
     
  10. fireontheside

    fireontheside Member

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    Okay...one more excerpt, but I think this will be it for now.

    I have to stop thinking about him. It won’t do any good at all, except get me deeper into obsession.

    I’ve had crushes, true. But something about this man just hits my sweet spot. He’s not someone that absolutely EVERYONE has a crush on (although plenty do). He goes from nerdy to sensual in less than a second and you don’t even know what hit you. He’s passionate, smart, funny, strange, amazing…I don’t even have words for the way he makes me feel.

    I almost feel like Sappho when I see him. A fine fire runs under my skin. Watching the show, I felt my heart start to pound knowing I would see him soon. I started to feel a strange tummy feeling. Why do I feel this way about him?

    He could be the biggest jerk in the world. Maybe he is. Maybe if I met him he’d just think I was weird, stupid, I don’t know.

    I felt my stomach drop when he kissed one of his clients on the cheek, that girl with the bridesmaid dress. I was so jealous of her. I felt my stomach tighten up and a weird heart feeling when he kissed his model. What I wouldn’t give to be her. I know I’m just jealous.

    That’s why this has to stop. I have to stop crushing on him like this. That’s exactly what it feels like…crushing. These feelings are crushing me. I almost can’t breathe.

    Sometimes I fantasize about marrying him, which is of course very stupid. I wish I could control this.
     
    #10 fireontheside, Apr 15, 2013
    Last edited: Apr 15, 2013
  11. dougsan

    dougsan New Member

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    Just because a person can write extremely well and can make love extremely well doesn't mean s/he can describe making love with beauty, urgency, or aplomb.
     
  12. lbushwalker

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    Fire, that was good and as RD'sGirl said a very different take.
    Describing obsessive desire is a highly erotic form of sexual writing; keep going!
    I would suggest dropping any negative references such as mentioning the woman with two kids maybe having a fat slob of a husband as it shatters the mood; just saying.
     
  13. fireontheside

    fireontheside Member

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    Okay. Maybe I can just call him a not-that-great husband. lol.
     
  14. lbushwalker

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    Irrelevant lover perhaps?
     
  15. fireontheside

    fireontheside Member

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    I don't know. I don't really care about "killing the mood" or whatever. I thought honesty was sexy? Right? lol.
     
  16. fireontheside

    fireontheside Member

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    Wow. I just wrote some more, and I CANNOT believe what I'm writing, seriously. I don't know what's wrong with me sometimes. Way more explicit than what I usually write, but then again, I'm inspired.

    Damn.
     
  17. sandwich

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    I like your prose. I can write music and lyrics, and I also write down funny things I have experienced, but prose of that nature is real hard for me. So when people like you have the talent, it is appreciated. Please tell about the explicit stuff, and who is your crush?
     
  18. fireontheside

    fireontheside Member

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    Basically I'm describing myself doing things to him, him doing things to me, and I'd rather not say who it is, which is part of why I'm not posting a lot of my prose--much of the description in it reveals exactly who I'm talking about.
     
  19. fireontheside

    fireontheside Member

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    I write songs too, btw. I wrote TONS of songs about my ex best friend after she left me. Ugh.
     
  20. Essene

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    ftfy

    You aren't talking about the mechanics of sex in the excerpt provided. You're writing and, I believe, thinking about topics quite a few women evaluate when thinking about someone who they have a crush on. I don't think there's necessarily a way to write like a virgin. You have over the top authors who discuss hard core sex and taboos- and you have the more subtle ones who write about intrigue, sapiosexual inclinations, Romance, etc. Your inexperience shouldn't matter. When someone writes a report concerning how to build something, they're usually supposed to do so in a manner that others can understand. To someone who is well versed in building whatever-it-is it may seem like this person may be inexperienced in building the object(s) when, in truth, it's mere perception.