Wife being seduced by a couple

Discussion in 'General Sex Discussion' started by Jenstanf, Feb 15, 2016.

  1. Jenstanf

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    oman, my husband took a promotion at work to get into management. I didn't understand why he needed to take it because he gets the jobs that no one else wants and is constantly away from home for long periods of time. This has put a strain on our marriage and our sex life. When I tried to talk to him about it he told me to take up a ceramic class or something to take up my time. Last week I went to a wine tasting at a local winery. I met a very nice couple and we sat and chatted for a long time. Before we said our goodbyes we exchanged emails and phone numbers because we live very close to one another. During the week we started emailing back and forth and that led to texting. During our texting she started asking me personal questions and I started confiding in her about what was going on with my sexlife. The texting got pretty heated that night and the next. she told me they are swingers and have been involved with married women many times. They have asked me to come over during the week for dinner and drinks, she even told me they smoke pot, I told her I haven't done that in years and she said it will be fun. I know what they want just not sure what to do
     
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  2. backcheck64

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    Your husband put his career before you, put your needs before him. Be prepared to divorce though....and it will work against you in court, but if this is what you want, go for it.
     
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  3. HazHardHat

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    Couple things to consider. Has it gotten so bad between you and your husband that you are willing to possibly sacrifice the marriage? I am assuming if your hubby found out you decided to get with the swinger couple it would cause major problems. Is that correct?

    Do you feel sexually attracted to the couple? Or is it more just the prospect of doing something you've never done before that is enticing?

    I know you said there is a strain on your sex life and marriage but is it something you feel that can't be repaired at this point?

    I am no expert but just some things that came to mind when I read over your post. Good luck to you, hope it works out for the best whichever way you choose to go :)
     
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  4. Jenstanf

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    Thank you for being so honest with me
     
  5. CLE32793

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    OK, wow, how long have you guys had problems? Did they just start over this promotion, I know that's not likely but still.

    Having fun with the swingers may look great right now but think about the long run...will it come back to haunt you? Is this change permanent with my husband? Sometimes finances come before anything else in the marriage, he may think he's doing the best he can and won't understand why you are not....
    Just remember once you go down that road there's not much chance of coming back :)
     
  6. teamster145

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    There are so many more things to consider than if it feels good do it.
    Do you love your busband? Have you tried counseling? Is this something he might be into as well? And most importantly, Is it safe, you just met these people?
     
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  7. CLE32793

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    Oh yeah, damn, I didn't even consider that Teamster. People can be very vindictive, it's hard to know who to trust.

    Biggest question ask....do you love your husband????? Wow, another good one to toss in there!
     
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  8. backcheck64

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    OK, I was assuming you know of your financial situation and if this was necessary, or just to get a nicer SUV. My wife and I discuss EVERYTHING. I forget thats not true in many, if not most relationships. If you're not financially destitute, and it's his ego or desire for a nicer house or car.... I'd question his love for you knowing what it would do to the dynamic of your relationship.
     
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  9. Jenstanf

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    I have tried to talk to him about it but it seems anything I do just makes it worse. I bought a vibrator and used are credit care because I wasn't trying to hide anything. When he asked me about it I got so excited and told him what I bought he told me to throw it in the trash that he wanted nothing to do with it.

    I don't know what it is with the couple I met, it's hard for me to explain. It's like she could tell there was something wrong with my marriage. That day at the winery they both made me feel so good that day. There was no talk about sex or anything like that. It was just like we new each other for a very long time. That night when we started talking about sex she new what to say. I felt like I was in a trance or something the things she said just put me at ease and made me feel so good about myself. I had he biggest orgasm I have ever had that night with her.
     
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  10. Jenstanf

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    I don't hate my husband if that's is what you are asking me!
     
  11. backcheck64

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    If that was his response, I'd seriously doubt his love for you.
     
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  12. CLE32793

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    No you misunderstand, I meant he asked that, I should have thought to ask that simple question.
     
  13. Jenstanf

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    No he didn't need to take this job, he actually lost money taking this position. He had to leave the union to except the position. Money has no issues in this at all
     
  14. backcheck64

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    Then he has little regard for you and your feelings. He might have seen this as a way out. I'd get my ducks in a row.
     
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  15. teamster145

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    Have you always had desires to be with a woman?
     
  16. CLE32793

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    Sweetie, I wasn't trying to be harsh or judgmental. I've been married 23 years in March, we have had our ups and downs (more ups), Teamster, Backcheck, both been married over 20 & 30 years, so between the tree of us responding you are looking at 70 years of marriage advice. We are just trying to help :)
     
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  17. backcheck64

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    and not loving your husband could include, like, indifference, apathy, disinterest......
     
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  18. Jenstanf

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    Thank you
     
  19. Amature

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    The wife of one of my very best friends called me one day. She was ready to leave her husband, but wanted my advice. He worked all the time. I explained to her that was the way he showed his love for her and the boys. He was working to provide a good living, and a secure future for his family. That was twenty years ago. She told me a couple years ago my advice made all the difference and she was glad she had taken it. I never mentioned this discussion to my friend. I didn't want him to know how close he came to loosing her.

    I can only suggest you think this over long and hard before jumping into anything. Your safety, your marriage, and your health could be at stake.
     
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  20. Jenstanf

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    I am
     
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