Whats Wrong With Me??

Discussion in 'Sex and Relationships' started by sheena86, May 18, 2007.

  1. sheena86

    sheena86 New Member

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    Im not sure how to explain this exactly. I am a very shy person, and when it comes to sex I am even worse. My fiance is getting frustrated at me because Im not into it as much as him and I dont want it as bad. All we do is missionary or doggy style because I get nervous when he asks me to try new things. Its like in my mind I always picture me coming onto him and being the dominant one in sex, but in reality it NEVER happens! Im very selfconcious as well, Ive just had my 2nd kid 7 weeks ago So Im still packing a little extra weight. I just dont know what to do. I want to make him feel like I want him and that I want sex but I can never do it. Someone please give me some advice to make me not so shy or whatever advice you can think of. :ugh
     
  2. Yangus

    Yangus New Member

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    You know i have the same problem dancing. My girlfriend wants me to dance with her, and I have no problem making a fool of myself in public, but when it comes to dancing I just can't let go and have fun. I wouldn't say there's something wrong with you, we all have our inhibitions I suppose.

    I guess my only advice for your situation would be to think of your fiance. Despite what you may think of yourself, he probably finds you very attractive, and having a confident partner will turn him on even more. Remember, it's just you and him in the room, no one's going to judge you.

    Also, just a quick question, do you and him ever watch porn together?
     
  3. Animularisen

    Animularisen New Member

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    No matter what weight you are... your beautiful tbh
    You just got to realise your fiance wants you so he must find you attractive...
    You need to push yourself... once you've done it once... it will get easier
    I used to be just like you, minus the kids.
    I'm just a bit overweight and I have very big boobs which make me self c
    I just forced myself to allow myself to be naked in front of him.
    Let him kiss your whole body... that way there is no way you can hide from him...
    once ur confortable with your body, experiamenting will come naturally
     
  4. sheena86

    sheena86 New Member

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    We have never watched porn together. He watches it on the computer about evereday. He has his certain websites that he goes too but thats about it.
     
  5. sheena86

    sheena86 New Member

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    Everytime I get the urge to be the dominant one and not the shy one I always feel embarressed because I feel like what happens if i mess up or do something wrong. How do you know what the right thing to do is?
     
  6. Puss_in_boots

    Puss_in_boots Adminatrix
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    I was the same way when I was twenty years old. I used to think I had to "be a certain way" for my partner and that certain behaviors were things that only "slutty girls" did...and I was constantly worried about doing something wrong. I'm in my 30s now and it took a long time for me to gain some sexual confidence.

    Just keep in mind that you're never going to learn anything new unless you experiment and practice, and some things might work and others won't. I guarantee your partner will not think less of you as a person. Most men are thrilled if their wives/partners are simply having sex with them and they're overjoyed when she wants to try something a little out of the ordinary or kinky. If something goes wrong you simply laugh about it and say, "well, that didn't work!" and then try something else.

    It'll take time, but you'll eventually gain the confidence you need.
     
  7. sheena86

    sheena86 New Member

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    Thanks for the advice. I will make my best attempt at trying new things. But what are some things that I could try that could be easy for me to do or get used to. Im not much for trying new things, but this is something that I have to overcome I guess. Anyone got some advice on what I could do as far as pleasing him or positions? let me know :) Thanks!
     
  8. SexyScorp

    Gold Member

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    Practise first

    In the mirror!!!! Be an actress...
    see how alluring you can look
    dress up in sexy clothes and wear
    some makeup and FEEL sensual
    and sexual.........
     
  9. Pride

    Pride New Member

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    dont think of it that way. i mean he is ur fiance ur going to be marrying him. he isnt just sum stranger or anything you shouldnt feel embarrassed or scared to mess up at all round him
     
  10. ~emm~

    ~emm~ New Member

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    talk to him about it, he should be able too support you by "Taking control" so you feel welcomed into doing stuff that you normally would be scared or shy to do
     
  11. MrsT1976

    MrsT1976 New Member

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    Hey girl you are feeling the same way as most... I have had this prob my whole life, but I have overcome it now, ALMOST! PM me and I would be happy to give you some advice. God Luck. xxx