What should I do? (nonsexual)

Discussion in 'Sex and Relationships' started by SlimDog, Dec 10, 2010.

  1. SlimDog

    SlimDog New Member

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    There's this girl that I'm really into, but she's taken. I thought that she was interested in me through her signs (hugging me all the time, calling me cute, touching my hair etc.). But she's currently dating this guy. We talked about her relationship today and the whole time she had a smile on her face - I think she's genuinely happy with him.

    It's just really discouraging and makes me want to forget about her. I don't know if she's just being open and friendly with me or if she really has feelings. Things would be so much easier if I could just stop liking her, but I can't. It's so hard to forget her, and some part of me still thinks that I have a chance.

    What should I do? Should I try my best to move on, or do you think I should stick around and see what happens?
     
  2. Barbwire

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    To me, it kinda seems that the way she acts towards you that she considers you to be a friend and that's it. I would move on and try to find someone that isn't in a relationship.
     
  3. Beach

    Beach New Member

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    Tricky situation..and painful too. As CL mentioned moving on might be the best but if you can handle it, keep subtle tab and if theres a chance..an opening, make a move then.
    Stay too close and you might fall in the friend zone, too far and you lose touch.

    Good luck
     
  4. backcheck64

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    I've had happily married women do the same thing to me, some people are just touchy feely. 99% chance it's just her personality, forget about it.
     
  5. luvbug

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    I agree with the others.....move on.
    Who knows...if she is interested in you and sees you moving on she might come right out and let you know she wants you....stranger things have happened.

    Does she know you like her?
     
  6. FlirtyChick

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    I echo this. Do your thing, and if it is meant to be it will happen. Don't spend precious time being hung up on something like this.....
     
  7. SlimDog

    SlimDog New Member

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    She doesn't know anything about me liking her. I've been trying my best not to let things show, and I think I've been pretty successful. She probably won't ever figure out that I'm "moving on."
     
  8. young_gun_91

    young_gun_91 New Member

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    Move on, but don't move on too far. Because what if she were to break up with this guy in a week? Then you'd realize that you were kidding yourself when you decided to "move on".

    I'm not trying to be the sour apple in this thread, I just don't want you to lie to yourself either.
     
  9. lovn_my_bbw

    lovn_my_bbw New Member

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    if she doesnt know then move on leave it, she wont care either if you "move on" your in the friendship zone....give up theres no escape...
     
  10. outofmymind

    outofmymind Member

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    What do you mean when you say nonsexual? Are you saying you wouldn't have sex with her? I agree with everyone here that you should move on. But ignoring her would be the best shot you have at having sex with her in this case, women love to get jealous. Except I don't know if sex is what you want.
     
  11. lbushwalker

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    Ignore dude and move on......if she still comes at you then maybe, but just maybe ok?
     
  12. SteveWaste

    SteveWaste New Member

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    It honestly sounds like she just sees you as a close friend or big brother. Honestly, if you care for her and she's legitimately happy in her relationship, I'd take to being happy for her and being there as a friend. I've got several "little sisters" that I've looked after for a few years now. We're close like you describe. Lots of hugs, kisses, and love, but it's platonic. I'd kick ass for any one of them, but my lady knows that she has my heart, so she doesn't worry about it; as she shouldn't.

    That is to say, if you're able to "just feel happy for her". What do you think?

    ~Steve
     
  13. Alwayslearningsex

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    Reading all the previous comments, I find it all makes sense in their ways, all good. Here is my take: Don't wait for her at all.
    If she sees you talking to another woman and has jealous signs then maybe, otherwise forget it. Let her see you be friendly and funny with someone else and gauge her reaction before deciding for good.

    My plan B would have been to go for it and try your luck but not as good.
     
  14. daver

    daver New Member

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    If you can handle it - and that may be a big IF - I suggest you just be the gentleman and continue with a platonic relationship with her. Be her good friend, her confidante, the one she can talk to about her relationships and feelings. Let her know that you genuinely care about her... all of which, I assume, is true. The only thing you might have to fake is expressing hope for her current relationship to flourish - but again, even if that is a bit of a white lie, it is the noble thing to do.

    Girls are smart. She'll know you have strong feelings for her, even if you don't come out and say it. And I'd give pretty good odds that, if and when her current relationship didn't work out, you'd be the one into whose arms she'd run.

    That said, don't sit around and wait for her. You do have to have a life and you can't put all your romantic eggs into one basket... especially if that basket is already full!
     
  15. loveit247

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    Don't move in on a taken woman unless you want the same thing to happen to you one day.

    That is my life philosophy, don't do anything to someone that you wouldn't want done to you.
     
  16. htoad

    htoad Active Member

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    I agree with those who are saying to look for a relationship elsewhere, but keep being friendly with her. Never burn bridges in life.

    I also think you should wish her the best and support her in her relationship. In my view, if you like someone enough, you want the best for them, even if it not necessarily the best for you.
     
  17. lovn_my_bbw

    lovn_my_bbw New Member

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    man this post is starting to feel like my early high school years......
     
  18. Logger

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    If she is talking to you, then you may be a better listener than the other guy. Men are not naturally giteted listeners, so work on your listening skils for venting. Many marriage advice books have chapters on men listening better. Love and Respect calls it spider-webbing.

    There are books written about how a man has stolen the wife from another man. If you can give her more than the other guy, just keep trying to date her. After she starts dating you, ask her to stop dating the other guy.


    //
     
  19. EscortBunny69

    EscortBunny69 New Member

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    I would back off and stay friends if you can, Move on like everyone has said. Not good to move in on a taken man or woman :ugh
     
  20. HardRocker

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    Another Logger classic.:eyes