[Ask a Girl] What does it really take to get you hot?

Discussion in 'Ask a Guy/Girl' started by Needyman, Sep 17, 2013.

  1. Needyman

    Needyman New Member

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    I would really like to know what it takes to get a women to first come to the point of anticipating the idea of having sex. Next what do you want to build up to the idea of actually having it and last what do you want from foreplay to the intercourse and then afterward. Want I am asking about is the process of sex not just the act but start to finish. In other words, dressed to undressed. Is there a process of mutual seduction or is it a one way street were the man has to do all the work?
    Perhaps, this may seem like a large question but the answers are important to me since I have no idea what the present norms are.
     
  2. Meee

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    Norms. Forget norms. Your question has a lot of norms right in it. Foreplay to intercourse to end. Dressed to undressed. Process. Steps.

    If you follow a step-by-step plan, there won't be any communication. There won't be any surprises. There won't be any improvisation, experimenting, and there almost certainly won't be any laughter.

    I think--though of course I don't know for sure--that you're looking for advice on how to get a woman in bed. Getting a woman to start thinking about having sex with you. From dressed to undressed, LOL. Maybe other people here will have some tips for you. I just think you need to be ready to take things out of their "normal" order and not think too much about a goal. Good luck.
     
  3. sandwich

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    The only norm is that there is no norm. All women are different. Some like lots of traditional forms of romance, while others like me hate that type of thing. The preferred order of sexual activities varies so much that no one could answer your question.

    If you're looking for a one nighter, then most of this doesn't matter so much. I've not had one, but if I did, I would just go with it. If you're really looking for a relationship, then that is when it becomes important to watch and listen. If you get to know her some, all these things will fall into place.

    In general, variety and at least some spontaneity is helpful. There will be those who always want to do it on a schedule and in the same manner most of the time, but for people like us on this forum, mixing it up is key.
     
  4. 12barblues

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    Great answers by two of the best...
     
  5. Needyman

    Needyman New Member

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    I want to thank you ladies for your input. I suppose my question(s) show my age and how long I have been away from the company of those of the "opposite sex". I have been monogamous for the past 34 years. So in truth I am lost and don't even know were to begin. Thus, I'm naive in many ways. When I was young I had many "girlfriends" but things are far different now. This is because they are "women" not "girls". This is a great difference because there is a different mentality.
    I have seen many women that I find attractive but I simply don't know what to say to them and often I feel extremely awkward. Then if I do speak I feel like I am sounding rather dumb! In one of my previous threats when I spoke of my past and I received many postings telling me that starting over wasn't that hard, however that is not true at all.
    Moreover, I am not into the club scene. I have been out but the females there are "kids" far younger than myself. Then when I have met older women they either have a ton of baggage that they want to vent or they are married in bad situations. This is something that I am escaping from myself. So I really do not want to get caught up in that. I have thought about dating services of all kinds but that doesn't seem to work either.
    I know for my generation there was, at least back then, a stupid type of ritual dance you had to go through, of course I think this was a matter of age more than anything. Therefore, I suppose I am asking you ladies, adult women, what you look for in a man. I do not want to be a fraud, to the contrary, I want to be real with no "rap ritual" like back in the 60's, 70's. From what I understood from you input this nonsense is not necessary. I am glad about this!
    Therefore, Ladies please keep up your insights, I am trusting in it to "re-educate" me.
    Once again, thank you.
     
    #5 Needyman, Sep 19, 2013
    Last edited: Sep 19, 2013