Virginity (male)

Discussion in 'General Sex Discussion' started by dcn7, Oct 31, 2010.

  1. dcn7

    dcn7 New Member

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    I speak as someone who is nearly 34 and is still a virgin. Yes, I haven't had sex once in my life, ever. Shocking, maybe? I'm not that way out of choice, it just hasn't worked out the way I would have perhaps liked (no, the way I WOULD have liked).

    You also begin to wonder at this age if you'll ever speak to any woman who is actually single. The number of times you start speaking to them and somewhere they drop in something about a boyfriend or even a husband is doubly frustrating. People say single women exist, well ok but where? Sure, they don't exactly go round wearing signs saying "hey everyone, I'm single" but you do begin to wonder after a bit. I have tried online dating but you get tired of all the superficial profiles and trying your hardest only to be ignored. Speed dating is even worse...3 minutes to make an impression...how? You do get clubs you can register with on the internet that sometimes organise events but often these are based around trips to bars and pubs and a social life based soley on alcohol and buying large rounds you can't afford gets tiresome after a while.

    Is there any hope? Or are some people destined to forever be single?
     
  2. Godiva

    Godiva Member

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    Only if you shut yourself out from them. Be patient and open minded and don't pass over any opportunity, perfection might lie beneath the surface. Singles are everywhere you look.
    Good luck!
    Try joining a hobby club of sorts to meet like minded people :) Or friends of friends? I'm sure you know someone who knows someone who is looking?
     
  3. backcheck64

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    I know a number of divorced women looking, but the V card would kill the deal. The ones I know would be creeped out a bit, you might want to think about a professional to get it out of the way, reduce anxiety and the stigma.
     
  4. cbrmale

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    Meeting the right woman was hard for me. Nightclubs weren't really my scene: too noisy, too crowded, too impersonal, and for a daytime person, no action until I was ready for bed. Pubs were the same to an extent, although not so noisy. In both cases, the chances of finding someone special rather than a partner for casual sex for the night were not great. I met my now wife through an introduction agency as they were before the Internet. There were several men for every woman, and my wife had many dates and was a bit jaded by the time we met. A lot of guys showed interest primarily in her dark skin, this being a sexual stereotype, but I digress. In any case we met and I fell in love, and she felt for me as well.

    How does one do it now? The Internet is possible, but random, and the problem is that women think, behave and communicate differently to men, and they often are seeking something a bit different from a relationship compared to us men. So if, say, I was to go onto the Internet and present myself, I could do a reasonable job and get some responses. But if I hadn't had several relationships and knew women well, it's possible that what I write wouldn't strike a chord.

    Beyond that there's the 34 year-old virgin scenario. Many women will be concerned about this, and what it says about a man's personality. The converse is the single woman who's attracted to married men (and I've had a few of those). This attraction is strongly based on married men having the stamp of approval from another women (his wife), and therefore he's a known quantity. Understand what I mean and how it affects a woman's perception of you?

    I really think that commercial sex with a classy escort would be a way to start, and may get you out of a problem. In the UK, sex work is legal and there are some good escorts who will not only relieve you of your virginity, but will converse and generally share a decent time with you. If you've ever seen the show with Billie Piper, it's strikingly close to reality. If you can imagine yourself being the centre of Belle's attention for a couple of hours, then give it a go. Beyond that, meeting someone close in age but unattached, most likely a divorced woman looking for a new start. Remember that women generally prefer masculine to 'nice', but good grooming, good manners, maturity and, most important of all, a good sense of humour are essential.
     
  5. dcn7

    dcn7 New Member

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    @cbrmale : like I can afford their prices...might have to get out the old credit card, like there isn't enough debt on there already!