Unlocking the woman in a woman

Discussion in 'General Sex Discussion' started by CosmicEye, Feb 19, 2012.

  1. CosmicEye

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    I was wondering if you guys had any advise about bringing out the sexual nature in a girl that seems like shes nervous or afraid of sex. This one girl doesnt give head or doesnt even grab me unless I put her hand on me myself. I want her to feel free and just go with anything that comes along. I have the feeling that she is a freak inside and I want that. I try talking to her about normal sex stuff and I even got her to shave (mmmmmmmmm), but she seems sorta distant on alot of simple things like even touching or kissing her in public.

    How can I help free the beast? Is it a gradual process or are some people just like that. I dont know what her libido is like yet, but I would guess medium high.
     
  2. somhairle

    somhairle Well-Known Member

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    Pretty difficult to say. Everyone is different. It may be that she has the perception that sex is wrong or shouldn't be enjoyed openly - at least by a woman. It may take time with her. Introducing her slowly and gradually to different things, talking openly about sex, involving her in things online? In the 'bedroom' she may be holding back and you could try to 'push' her a little each time you have sex. Maybe gradually she will relax and become more adventurous.

    But I don't think you should scare the wits out of her by forcing your man bits down her throat and telling her that everyone does it ;). That may backfire!

    On the positive side, getting her to shave............. Well done you. Something I have yet to manage!
     
  3. ginger

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    My advise is (and what the hell do I no) time, patients and understanding

    Hope all works out
     
  4. PDone7

    PDone7 Member

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    Time

    It has taken me over ten years. My girl was very bashful and had only one blow job and fingering with an ex before me. So I broke her virginity. Which is beautiful but maybe she could have done with a little more experience.

    We are still getting there and some things I fear may have to remain in a fantasy for me [I can list if anyone wants]. But that is cool.

    :):)
     
  5. lbushwalker

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    [How can I help free the beast? Is it a gradual process or are some people just like that. I dont know what her libido is like yet, but I would guess medium high.[/QUOTE]

    Really depends on the person.
    My own now only SO was 26 yo with no past experience, not even masturbation yet in less than 3 months after I took her virginity she not only was able to orgasm but became multi orgasmic with an insatiable appetite for anything sexually related.
    No complaints mind but now must admit that she in driver's seat and it is me trying to keep up ;)
    BTW she very early on decided to shave her pussy bald and has since done the same to my tackle and yeah it feels awesome :)
     
    #5 lbushwalker, Feb 19, 2012
    Last edited: Feb 19, 2012
  6. somhairle

    somhairle Well-Known Member

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    Yeah, rub it in, why don't you ;)
     
  7. lbushwalker

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    No offence meant dude, just saying it really depends on the person.
    BTW SO currently won't even contemplate girl on girl or anal stuff both of which I plan to pursue with her so pushing boundaries is both challenging and fun.
    Only issue is that once she gets going on something then I find it real hard to keep up so a bit like letting the genie out of the bottle....unpredictable :lol
     
  8. backcheck64

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    Tequilla, lots of tequilla
     
  9. somhairle

    somhairle Well-Known Member

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    Just joking, lbushwalker. It is a bit of a recurrent theme in some/many of my posts and a blog ;)
     
  10. lbushwalker

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    I know that well Scotty boyo!
    Of course where you live unlike here it helps having a bit of cover :lol
     
  11. 12barblues

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    dont stop bein' you, somhairle...we're catchin' on....:lol
     
  12. 12barblues

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    couldnt agree more....if she needs an excuse to show how she really wants to be...then "i had too much to drink last night" is a good one...but once it happens maybe she'll be able to communicate about it more openly.
     
  13. pbs

    pbs
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    I think most women really want to be desired and to please their man, but early in life, many learned that sex is bad or dirty or whatever, and can't seem to shed that baggage. In my case it was a matter of trust. She had to be absolutely certain that she would not be hurt in ANY way before she would let herself go, and there are still minor residual inhibitions that are slowly fading, after almost 40 years of marriage.
     
  14. somhairle

    somhairle Well-Known Member

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    Thanks, guys. I also do serious...............(sometimes!) :lol

    And I suspect our climate may have a lot to do with the shaved/not shaved business. It causes most of our women to sleep most of the day. No time left for sex never mind shaving :eek

    Sexual Forums.com...........the views expressed here are solely those of the member somhairle and are in no way the views of the board administrators!
     
  15. 12barblues

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    i agree....and if you think about it...we (men) are mostly to blame for creating these inhibitions in women...because as men we want our lovers to be sexual animals, horny nasty slutty...but as fathers we expect our daughters to be virginal, pristine little creatures that would never let "billie" do THAT to her...problem is, every woman is some mans daughter. Is it any wonder they have all this conflict inside? any wonder why they choose a man that is" responsible", "stable", "a good father" ( for a husband) but wont open themselves up sexually because they need that relationship to be "respectful"? But they burn inside and seek to release those desires with the "bad boy" ...the guy who pulls her hair and throws her on the floor and looses his mind and fucks her with a savage lust that she doesnt get from her "gentle, good father, respectable" husband. and the poor husband, he's convinced that she could never "want" to be treated "that" way...because every time he tries, she shuts him down because she doesnt want to be a "slut" ....

    What a fucking viscious cycle....the only way it can end is if you have a respectable, stable, kind relationship outside the bedroom. But inside the bedroom? we as men should be the good guy outside the bedroom and the badboy inside it...and she should be my princess outside it and my whore inside it......

    But I could be wrong.....and i probably think too much....lol.
     
  16. CosmicEye

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    Thanks for all the great advise guys and I lol'd. I try and talk openly and it works. Im not asking her to go anal but I want her to grab my cock and/or tell me how much she wants it. Sorta dirty talkin me instead of me taking complete control. She has a hot body and the shaved pussy was making me aggressive cuz I wanted it so bad lol. BTW, this was the first time we had sex together :) and it was really fucking good.

    I need to pull an Ibushwalker and turn her into my dirty whore lol
     
  17. CosmicEye

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    THIS!

    This is sort of why I dont want a daughter cuz I dont wanna think about it. I see this all the time too when Dads are way overprotective and when the unflowered girls go to college, they are complete sluts when they discover the power of the penis. You are absolutely right barblues!
     
  18. cbrmale

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    Your SO is Asian, isn't she? Basically Asian women don't have the embedded Christian cultural hang-ups over sex. I have some wonderful memories of some wonderful young (and by definition inexperienced) Asian girls who were equally insatiable and amazingly adventurous.

    I can't offer much to the OP as my wife is African and they have a different take on sex. African culture is about vanilla sex and even mild variations like oral sex are taboo (although we changed that). The other thing about African culture is they are insatiable for that vanilla sex and can't get enough. So it's quantity rather than quality, and it can be hard for me to keep up with her sex drive. But this doesn't help the OP with a shy young white woman.
     
  19. lbushwalker

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    cbrmale sometimes your insights astound me ;)
    Of course my SO is Asian and religious RC to boot yet does not have the Anglo Saxon inhibitions and fear of God that our regular women do.
    I have yet to rationalise how they (Asian babes) can be so prim and proper yet at the same time be so open to overt sexuality.
    WTF I love them for it!
     
  20. mikeh

    mikeh New Member

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    In response to the original post.

    If I know women just half as well as i think I do then the answer is simple. Don't bother trying to work it out. Women are a completly different breed to men.