[Ask a Guy] Two men, one woman threesome first timers

Discussion in 'Ask a Guy/Girl' started by ladylavender, Nov 5, 2013.

  1. ladylavender

    ladylavender New Member

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    My husband has been hinting that he wants to have oral sex with a man, so I came out and asked him and he admitted he was curious. I have read other forums to see that it is normal to be curious about it. He suggested a threesome with another man. I am still getting used to the idea of him sucking another man's penis, let alone having sex with another man all three of us together. I am not sure I can even do it. But I would rather be present and a part of whatever he is doing other than him going off on his own and doing it without me, most likely not even telling me about it. I have never had a casual encounter. He has he hasn't but I am not sure if he would tell me. It took all of this to tell me about the curiosity. I don't know any man I would even want to have sex with, let alone one that would want to be with me and him. How would you even find someone, someone safe and my biggest question is afterwards. Does is hurt the relationship? Is there judgmental issues once the emotions settle. Can it be enough to go back to one on one or would it make it so it wouldn't be enough anymore and that would become the new norm? I would like to know if you could go back, would you do it again or would you advise against it. My marriage is important to me and I really don't want another person as a part of it on a regular basis but casual sex isn't really something that I think I can even do, especially not more than once.
     
  2. alwaystry

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    Well I have had mfm threesomes but I myself did not touch the guy. This adds another aspect to the situation. It sounds like to me you two are going 0 to 60 in a snap of the fingers. I am all about trying new things with my partner but you have to start slower. Feel it out, talk about it. Yes this threesome could be amazing and I have had a blast but yes it can put a strainor ruin a relationship. You need a lotof trust and understanding. As far as who with , well that is touchy also. Many differant ways to look at it , with a friend it can make it awkwward and even ruin a friendship , a stranger , well more risk involved. having said this , in my experience it has been a major turn on and a lot of fun , but it is not for everybody. Based on what you wrote , I do not think it is something for you but who knows. Feel itout , try some new things but take it slow.
     
  3. Dogooder

    Dogooder New Member

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    Ladylavender,

    Alwaystry certainly has far more expertise than I have in the thee corner arena so in many ways I'd defer to him.

    Something I learned the hard way was that it is important to be true to yourself. You worry about losing him if you don't. Your worried about an outsider inter loping between you and him should you go this route of a threesome.

    In the end you need to be true to your self. I'd rather fail being true to self than fail doing something I wasn't sure was the best thing to do. I speak from wisdom gained painfully.

    All the best to you, lady. If ya need to bend an ear drop me a PM.
     
  4. lbushwalker

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    Ok he has a cock sucking curiosity which is not uncommon if you care to read some the recent threads here but to go to a threesome for the experimentation is taking it to a whole new level unnecessary to the objective.
    If it is your wish better to be an onlooker than participant and a number of ladies on this site have expressed delight at witnessing such a spectacle or if not just knowingly indulge him but whatever your choice be certain that you are comfortable with your decision.
    I repeat do not allow yourself to be pressured into a threesome sex situation as for that there is no return to square one and given your view on the issue it will without much doubt ruin your marriage.
    That is just my opinion and others may beg to differ although I suspect few would.
     
  5. Silverfox

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    If you'd be jealous of him going down on another woman with you present, then I don't see how you wouldn't be jealous if he's sucking some dude's cock. He's sharing his sexuality either way.

    Bringing someone new into your bed is life altering. I know there are a lot of couples who are into this, but if you're not completely certain you can share him with someone else, man or woman, you should have a long think about this.

    I've often wondered what my wife's experiencing when she's going down on me, but I'll never know because I can't take the chance of wrecking the good situation I already have. Your husband, like me, may have to keep wondering. You need to think long term. How will you feel if he digs it and wants to make it regular. How will you feel the day after, the week after, the month after?

    We all like sex in it's different forms or we wouldn't be in this forum. But, some fantasies can't be acted upon. We still live in the real world. Make sure you know yourself well enough before you make a change you can't take back.
     
  6. ladylavender

    ladylavender New Member

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    Thank you everyone for your answers. I decided to tell my husband that although I want him to be happy, I don't feel I have it in me to do a threesome with him and anyone else. It isn't about jealousy, its about not wanting an outside influence on what we have together. You can't go back and it would just never be the same between us again. Yes, he could like it and want more, but I think both of us would regret it in the end. He has been cheated on, I have been cheated on. No matter how much we love each other I feel our insecurities about fidelity would eventually eat away at our trust. If we were willing to have sex with a stranger together how far would it be to do it alone if the other decided it wasn't for them. I don't want it, never did and no matter what that means, it won't happen. I am a good woman, faithful to him and his curiosity will have to remain if he wants to stay with me. Sex is sex, oral, penetration, even basic foreplay should be off limits if you both agree that sex with others is not allowed in the relationship. Silverfox I liked your post the most because it is how I hope that he feels about me. When I asked if he was disappointed that I said I couldn't do it, he was very firm in his answer, no no no. I think he is happy about it. Not sure he would actually go through with it even if I had said yes.
     
  7. Blue4u

    Blue4u New Member

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    I suspect that the experiences you shared here happen more frequently than one might expect, and that almost all the time they reach the same resolution. I suspect that many couples reach the point of considering the possibility of a threesome, but only a tiny few pursue it.
     
  8. Cappy_Dick

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    Threesomes of both types can be fulfilling sexual experiences. However, they can also be dangerous if the couple adding the third cannot emotionally handle it. If you cannot seperate sex from love, then don't do it.

    xx
     
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  9. clonly602

    clonly602 Member

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    Perhaps suggest a dildo and you can be the one he is sucking off. I could see that being mutually fun for you both.
    I have no desire to have my dick sucked (by a man) but have wondered what it is like to suck dick. I stick her dick like dildo in my mouth to lube it up from time to time, but doubt I could actually suck another mans...i dont even like my own half the time. LOL
     
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  10. SexologistHlp

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    There are guys who are curious for a lot of stuff. That includes your guy and me :p I want to suck a guy too and I am go getter. If I want something I work for it and get it. But I still havent done it yet and will not do it because of issues like STD, hygiene, privacy etc. A marriage is a much bigger risk to take. I am sure your husband will understand, the curiosity will remain but since the stakes are high he will know how to deal with it.

    Hope this helps.