Threesome With My Boyfriend

Discussion in 'Sex and Relationships' started by alijo, Mar 3, 2008.

  1. alijo

    alijo New Member

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    So I've been with my boyfriend for about a year now. We live together and we've been very faithful to each other. We are very sexual and we've talked about having a threesome for some time now. We've just gotten very serious about it and we're now looking for a third person to join us. Now here's the thing...at first I told him he couldn't' fuck her, but I've since changed my mind because I think it could be really hot to watch. I've never messed around with a girl but I've always fantasized about it so I'm really excited about that as well. He's done a couple of threesomes before, but this is my first time and I'm worried I'm going to get really jealous instead of enjoy it. I don't THINK I will but that's a major concern. I don't want it to kill our relationship. Secondly, how do I approach someone to join us in bed? I'm not really kosher with doing it with a stranger but it would be so uncomfortable to approach a friend about it and them say no and be kind of...embarassed haha. So any tips there would be great. And the last thing...what are your favorite threesome positions? We're pretty adventurous so I'm wanting to try a bunch of different positions and whatnot.
     
  2. Halogen

    Halogen New Member

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    Well, the first thing I'd advise is to make sure you are 100%, crystal clear ready for a threesome. To be honest, it doesn't sound as though you are. You shouldn't THINK you won't be jealous, you should KNOW for SURE you won't be jealous. You really need to be careful when entering into a threesome. It could permanently destroy your relationship if it isn't handled in the right way.

    There's a couple on here, Mr. and Mrs. Espresso. Recently they engaged in a threesome with the stipulation that if ANY activity WHATSOEVER made one of them uncomfortable, the threesome was to be stopped immediately. Mr. Espresso did become uncomfortable, and the events were stopped. I think that is a wonderful way to handle a threesome. They talked it over and everything's fine now. (Hi, if you're reading this, Espressos!)

    As far as approaching a third person..why not sign up for a swinger's website and meet this person a few times before you have a sexual experience?

    And as far as positions- um..i can't help you there.
     
  3. Luckyman

    Luckyman New Member

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    Hi - I'm also new to this forum. Check out my recent posts in this topic (A Little Advice). The thing to be aware of is this - the only reason for jealously is to think that there is a chance that the third could steal your boyfriend away from you. If you are dealing with someone that you don't know (ie. a swingers chat etc.), this shouldn't be a problem. If you are dealing with someone you trust (ie. a close friend) this shouldn't be a problem. If you're dealing with someone he suggests...there might be a problem. There is the chance that he might be wanting to fulfill a fantasy of his without screwing up the relationship that he holds dear - with you. My advise - complete and full discloser. Communication is the key. You are obviously close, as you've been living together, so there shouldn't be a problem in talking with him openly and honestly. This is what my wife and I did and the results have been beyond my wildest dreams. The three of us are entering into a relationship that is so incredibly fulfilling on a physical, spiritual and emotional level that we can't put into words how wonderful it is.
    Talk to your boyfriend - find out what he wants the end result to be - then go from there...then talk some more...then talk some more. It could be incredible. Good luck!
     
  4. Fungirl

    Fungirl New Member

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    Sounds to me like your gonna have fun since youw actually want to want to watch your bf do another girl. I think thats the part most women have trouble with when a guy wants a threeway with two girls.
     
  5. yorkiesmurf

    yorkiesmurf New Member

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    Having done threesomes before I can tell you jealousy will kill a threesome and potentially your relationship. If you believe you will be jealous then you must ask yourself are you able to control your jealousy so that the threesome can happen and if not then in my honest opinion a threesome is out of the question for you.

    Provided that you are able to control your jealousy the question becomes who do you pick a friend or a stranger. There are varying thoughts on this and from an experience perspective you best choice is a stranger. First reason is that your will change your friendship forever once you ask a friend. Second reason is that friends can complicate a threesome situation. At least from my perspective strangers to work better.

    In regard to asking someone about a threesome. Being in a threesome situation requires you to be assertive and communicative. This means using euphamisms, shadow puppets, or any way to hint to having a threesome will not work. The best way is to be up front about what you want. If you are in a swingers club or on a threesome ad site it is pretty obvious what you are wanting. However if you are asking someone in person then you must be on point about exactly what you are wanting.

    Finally in regard to positions you first need to get over your jealousy hurdle and find someone before worrying about positions. They will happen based on the type of threesome you are planning. If you take too much on then it makes it that much more difficult to get it to work.
     
  6. ctown75

    ctown75 New Member

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    Go see first.

    If you are unsure, go to a swingers club where there is less pressure and watch for a while,if you become uncomfortable then is not for you.The rules at swingers clubs are you do not do anything if you do not want to so there is no pressure,try having sex right next to another couples with no touching and see how that feels. If you stil want to swing after that then do it at home.
     
  7. Luckyman

    Luckyman New Member

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    Agreed - I was hung up on positions (and my wife more so) before anything happened in our threesome. Once we were all there, everything just kind of fell into place. Don't worry - your body will know what to do.
     
  8. kailikitten

    kailikitten New Member

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    I had a threesome once, I let one of my first BF's friends watch us, because I thought
    he was so hot, and I let my BF think he was getting what he wanted, so I could. me and
    my BF started and I let his friend join in and I had done anal before, but never at the same
    time as vaginal, and ohh did I ever cum over and over again as they worked me, and we did
    it like that a few more times, I loved it so much.