Threesome or 4some (or more lol)

Discussion in 'General Sex Discussion' started by cona2k, Jan 22, 2007.

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  1. cona2k

    cona2k New Member

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    me and my fella ar toying with the idea of introducing another person or more into our sex like im bi and he is curious. any advice (or offers)
     
  2. heelfetish

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  3. bighiker2003

    bighiker2003 Banned

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    Yes, Go for It, As long as both of you are wanting it then DO IT.
    A few don't.
    Don't swing with FRIENDS, They wont be friends long.
    Both of you should fully agree with who you are swinging with.
    Don't go separate ways.
    Their is a ton of swinging ads on the internet..


    Just a word if you are new here, I was an active swinger for
    years and never had a problem, Most of the time on this forum
    the subject comes up by a man wanting only a FMF type thing
    so don't start their.
     
  4. heelfetish

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    Good advice as always, bighiker! :bow
     
  5. Nobody

    Nobody Member

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    A good place to learn more about swinging, talk to local couples and individuals, and even meet them is a site called http://www.swappernet.com.
     
  6. MikeDog

    MikeDog New Member

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    Sounds like you 2 are already on the way if you've talked about it.
     
  7. bighiker2003

    bighiker2003 Banned

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    Good advice as always, bighiker!

    Thanks HF

    Hiker:sf
     
  8. nashtu3000

    nashtu3000 New Member

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    make it a 9some :)
     
  9. bighiker2003

    bighiker2003 Banned

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    4 men and 5 Women all oiled up
    Yea I could go for that,
    But unfortunately I never have.

    Hiker:sf
     
  10. yorkiesmurf

    yorkiesmurf New Member

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    This may be a bit long my apologies:

    To begin with threesomes and foursomes generally work the best if the couple is married and if they are not that they have a history together. For couple that is dating and only have been together for a short period of time the chances of something going wrong is quite high. My general feeling a couple should be together for a minimum of two years before trying a threesome. I am not saying that you need to be together for a minimum period of 2 years. However if you do not have a history together then there is a greater chance of issues such as one partner cheating on the other partner by playing with the invited third behind their backs, a greater chance of issues in the relationship surfacing due to the communication structure not being there, and a greater chance of hurt feeling / jealousy surfacing.

    Even if you have a history together you need to have solid relationship and strong communications skills. Theses assets are needed to help the relationship through anything unforseen and to help resolve any issues that may come up as a result.

    If the two of you have been together for a period of time then you are ready to take the first step. The first step involves discussing the general outlay of the encounter which typically includes a discussion of boundries. Boundries include the type of person / couple you are looking for, what is off limits, what is acceptable, and resolving any feelings that could impact the encounter. The main things to remember are both of you have a veto, that both of you need to be on the same page, neither of you should feel pressured / manipulated to do this, and that you progress as fast as the person who is the least comfortable with it.

    Once the two of you feel that you are ready to search for the third and are comfortable with the boundries then you are ready to look for the other. Searching can be time consuming especially if you are looking for a single female. There are several place you can search Internet, swingers clubs, and other places too. From personal experience I would recommend staying away from friends and co-workers as possible selections. There are several reasons for this and a topic in its own right.

    After finding the right person / couple then it is important to discuss with them your boundries and make sure the two of you continue to communicate even after you have agreed on boundries. Provided they agree to your boundries and the encounter happens make sure that the two of you take time to debrief (talking about the encounter amongst yourselves) before going to bed and that the two of you work through any issues that may have come up as a result of the encounter. My guess is that you may have some guilty feelings afterwards and your bf may have some issues of jealousy. It is important that these issues are resolved to both of your satisfactions as soon as possible.
     
  11. goldsounds

    goldsounds New Member

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    The key for my gf and I was to be sure to talk about it alot and all of the possible negative consequences. We met another guy, someone she knew already casually through work, and had a very nice 3-some, though pretty tame by many standards. Afterwards we talked about any bed feelings we may have had and all was well. haven't done it since though, but mostly because we haven't found the right person yet :)
     
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