i'm really targeting this thread to those who've been married for over 8-10 years, because, in my opinion, chemistry runs fairly well for a long time. folks married only a few years might not have the same experience and/or perspectives. i'm not saying your experiences aren't worthy. please, i mean no disrespect. i AM saying i'm interested in those who've "been there, done that" a little longer. ok, enough of that. here's the situation. obviously marriage is based upon both chemistry and friendship. most of us don't marry people unless both components are there. the problem, for many, is that the chemistry dies after years and years of marriage. some of us have been on roller coasters where it comes back and goes, comes back and goes--but there does seem to be a time for many when the chemistry fizzles all together. five of my friends are now divorcing for this very reason. i am now divorcing for this very reason. one of my male friends asked me what i now look for in the men i date. has the experience changed what i look for? i don't think it has, for me, but i'm interested to hear what others have to say. just how important is sexual chemistry in deciding whether or not to date someone?