Steps to hawking up mucas?

Discussion in 'The Lounge' started by Emt, Aug 27, 2006.

  1. Emt

    Emt New Member

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    My gf is unable to hawk a loogie. I know this is probably enough to gross some of you out, but for her it's a serious issue since she gets a lot of colds and mucas related stuff going on.

    Anyone know of a site that explains step by step how to hawk?...using various muscles at certain times? I can do it constantly, but I can't explain it to her very well.

    Any ideas?

    Thanks!

    -Emt
     
  2. melicious

    melicious The Old Maid
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    OMFG! No way! Ugh....
     
  3. Puss_in_boots

    Puss_in_boots Adminatrix
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    Non-comedogenic makeup I can handle, but I'm afraid I can't help you out with this one. :eek

    Hawking up a loogie is probably one of those things you just know how to do.
     
  4. Jayce

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    This sounds similar to some people being unable to snap. Some people... just... can't... snap...
     
  5. Thorn

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    I have do clear my throat several times during the night and also often when I'm smoking and drinking a few beers on the back deck. It's funny though that I don't have to do it at all when I'm smoking and drinking with friends at a bar.

    I guess if I had to verbally explain or teach someone the technique I would tell them to try to make deep sounds from the area of their throat where the mucus is located. Kind of coughing sounds. After practicing that a few times they should get the hang of using those muscles to bring it up.

    If that works for your g/f I'll let you advise her of what do with the loogie once she gets it up. :lol
     
  6. Rose

    Rose Resident Sexy Grandma
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    This is just ..... W-R-O-N-G!!!
    :puke
     
  7. Thorn

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    Yeah and the saddest part is that in the end it all comes down to the big question,

    "SPIT OR SWALLOW?"

    Only on the sex list! :ugh
     
  8. melicious

    melicious The Old Maid
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    Only on a sex list by a freakin' MAN!! Ugh.
     
  9. Emt

    Emt New Member

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    So no one knows of a step by step page online?

    Thanks for the reply Thorn...Rose and Mel..yall crack me up...keep hecklin:p

    -Emt
     
  10. HerHubby

    HerHubby The SF Poet Laureate
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    Pay no attention to those sissy wimps above! Buncha pansies! See, one key to it is hydration. If she is dehydrated, the loogie is not gonna have the mass needed to be hawked up and it just sorta stays down there and becomes bacterial fodder. Next, she has to get her diaphram (that is, the tissue in her chest cavity beneath the lungs and not a birth control device) into it. She has to get some wind behind that loogie so that it will pull loose and pop on out. It might be good to give her some cough medicine containing and expectorant and have her drink lots of water. That'll help blow that mucous right outta there! Of course, spitting or swallowing is personal preference. If she spits, maybe she could practice and try for distance. Of course, last year when I was in the hospital, this old gentleman (way older than me - he was about 90) had pneumonia. The nurses used a suction device (no, not any of the ladies around here, a mechanical one) to suck out the boogers and loogies. The jar into which the machine drained them was right above the head of my bed so I could see all the boogers 'n' loogies floating around in there. Even so, that ol' guy was still pretty good at hawkin' up those loogies without the machine! He had good technique! Wouldn't all this just gag a maggot and make a buzzard retch?! ;> Oh, by the way, last year, when I had been discharged from the hospital, I was waiting for my wife to come pick me up and on the TV in my hospital room was a movie called "Tammy and the Doctor" (no, it was made back in the '50s and had nothing to do with porno). Anyway, this month, on the anniversary of my hospital discharge, at the same hour, I happened to turn on that same TV channel and they were showing "Tammy and the Doctor" again! Is that WEIRD or what?! What?! ;> "Why ah do declare!", said Miss Tammy Tyree, "Emt, yo' girlfriend shore is gittin' good at hawkin' up them loogies!"
     
  11. HerHubby

    HerHubby The SF Poet Laureate
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    Has anybody around here ever done a thread about lighting farts?!
     
  12. Emt

    Emt New Member

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    You mean the Blue Flame club??? Nope, never did it...have at it hoss;)

    -Emt
     
  13. HerHubby

    HerHubby The SF Poet Laureate
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    Not this hillbilly! ;>
     
  14. Thorn

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  15. Rose

    Rose Resident Sexy Grandma
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    LOL - can't you see why I married this man? :eyes
     
  16. HerHubby

    HerHubby The SF Poet Laureate
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    Hope this finds Thorn and Rose safe after Ernesto passed through! Take care you two!