so I have a problem

Discussion in 'General Sex Discussion' started by 686, Jun 5, 2008.

  1. 686

    686 New Member

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    I just met this girl and i lost my virginity to her, the first time everything went great but now i cant cum. We've only had sex a total of 3 times and i just cant cum i don't know what the problem is at first i though it was nerves but now i feel really comfortable around her. what should i do?
     
  2. Mr. G

    Mr. G Member

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    So you've been able to cum only on the first time of the three?

    Think you should just try more and things like more foreplay and different positions etc. I would also like to know more on these occasions when you where unable to cum. How long did keep going? Did you try different positions?

    And do you masturbate a lot? Can you still cum while masturbating?

    Don't think there's any need to get too worried quite yet. You're still very unexperienced and this will probably be fixed with just some more practice. Normally when you loose your virginity it's just so exciting and new that you'll cum rather quickly (I sure did :p) and the difference in the duration between just the first and second time can be really big.

    So, you should explore it some more and provide more info.
     
    #2 Mr. G, Jun 5, 2008
    Last edited: Jun 5, 2008
  3. 686

    686 New Member

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    i can still cum every time i masturbate and last time we kept going for a reeally long time and i still couldn't cum. I got to the point where it felt like i was just about to but then nothing happened.
     
  4. JuicyB

    JuicyB New Member

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    Happens to the best of us!

    Do not making coming a goal! Just relax and enjoy what you do get. Quit trying to perform! Break your routine. Agree to switch to oral sex only for a few sessions. And try a few things that you usually don't do. Variety and fun can work wonders!
     
  5. Lotus77

    Lotus77 New Member

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    just hang in there it will happen
     
  6. ninja08hippie

    ninja08hippie Official SF Hugger
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    I heard that you have a problem and thought a hug was in order :)
    [​IMG]


    To the matter at hand: I seem to remember having a hard time after losing my virginity too. Don't worry, it will pass in time. For the mean time, try switching positions, certain positions (missionary :p) may not stimulate you in the right place. I find that if you modify missionary so that her legs are around you (called The Crab I think) I get much more stimulation (as does she.)
     
  7. yorkiesmurf

    yorkiesmurf New Member

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    Without more information it is difficult to say what could be the underlying problem. Position can be an issue so can not being properly aroused. Other issues can be if you are using drugs which includes cannabis or drinking alcohol prior to having sex it can greatly influence you ability to cum.

    Based on your postings my opinion is it is not physical. Istead, based on your posting my opinion is it is either a fear of pregnancy or a fear of being compared to previous bf / lovers. If you are going 'bareback' I would suggest using a condom and talk to her about other forms of contraception. As minimizing the risk of pregancy can help with your enjoyment. Furthermore insecurity is common when you first start to have sex and you may not know it to begin with. However it does subside in time.
     
  8. erosexpressions

    erosexpressions New Member

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    It could be a collection of different things that are keeping you from cumming. Whether its stress from every day life (or something specific), nerves about sexual performance, or other outside stimulus they'll all keep you from cumming. Alcohol and other drugs can often keep you from finishing if thats your sole goal. Could even be your not that interest in the girl or she doesn't really do it for you.

    Def. mix things up, keep trying but most of all don't get upset if you can't cum. Enjoy everything that sex offers, all the feelings and experiences but if your only goal is to cum then its just another job. One you rarely even get paid for at that
     
  9. 686

    686 New Member

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    well problem solved. i don't know what it was but its gone now i can cum. thnx for your help though guys
     
  10. tatman523

    tatman523 New Member

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    wow, if only i had ur problem, i cum to quick and i havent been a virgin for 5 years.

    im glad u worked out ur problem though
     
  11. evilkid69

    evilkid69 New Member

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    glad you got ur problem solved...it happens to me alot ive like trained myself not to cum until i pleased the girl