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Discussion in 'Sex and Relationships' started by Prettypeter4, Dec 31, 2011.
Ive had oportunitys for sex but am shy and muck it up HELP PLEASE
U can be honest with them and if they dig u, u can say how shy you are, and it might come off as cute and caring so they might make the first move to help relax u. Best i can think of righ tnow i'm sure others can advise better
I really want to be of some help here as I too am shy.
But I don't really have any experience to draw from because I'm shy so sorry about that.
Agreed! Some women actually like to see a lil bit of vulnerability as long as you dont over do it.
If she is a good woman she will be accomodating
There is no magic cure, just take little steps. Start talking to random people like at the grocery store or anywhere about anything. With Shyness and most things the anticipation of embarrassment or rejection is worse than the actual thing.
Not trying and regretting is something you never get over. Trying and failing leaves your thoughts pretty quickly and makes the next time easier.
Myself, being a guy that is not "well endowed" and was shy, found that my first real sexual experience was FANTASTIC!
This woman was 25 years older than I and when I jumped into the bed, I still had my underwear on! :lol I told her that that this was my first time and I was shy and embarrassed of my member, but that didn't seem to matter to her. I felt I needed to be totally open with her.
Well, after the event, she didn't want me to leave.
I do not mention that like I am bragging but I tell you that because I thought I mucked it up!!
Just be yourself bro and you may find an opportunity that you can relive and enjoy for a long time!!
I agree with Havoc. I've been shy most of my life. After I stopped I noticed a few things that strongly contributed to that 'condition'. First, if you're anything like me you rationalize why you are shy. You make up excuses of some sort, even brief ones that justify it. These can be like obsessions. The earlier you figure out they are bullshit the better. Self-esteem fantasies are the worst of these. It isn't about what you deserve, it is about what you need and your right to have needs. You need a relationship like you need food and air. Along with that is the fear of rejection. Here's a little secret, no matter how well you get to know someone they will never know you completely. In fact 99% of the people you will become acquainted with during your life won't know you at all and will have no interest in spending time to get to know you.
That 99% doesn't deserve any more from you than what they give you. Thus, their opinion of you is meaningless in the long run since you won't know them for very long before they disappear from your life forever. If you keep that in mind then their rejection is utterly meaningless.
Second, like Havoc said, talk to as many people as you can. Talk about them. People like for you to sincerely talk about them and will reward you for doing so. Sometimes the reward is sex, sometimes the sex is awesome, and the next thing you know you are picking out a place to live.
When I was in high school, I remember a guy who used to use as a line to get girls, "I can't cum." This was seen as a challenge by many girls and this guy scored a lot. I can only imagine what a girl might think if a guy told her that she was going to be his first. As an experienced and mature lover, I would relish finding a willing virgin, if I wasn't married, and I'm sure there are women who would feel the same way . Just be yourself.
This is a good point, and if I may clarify it a bit, ask people questions that are designed to get them to talk about themselves, and when they do, listen for opportunities for follow up questions that make them want to talk more. The best conversationalist is a good listener, and people love to talk about themselves. This is the best way to get people interested in you
No it has to do with the parents. I do blame my mom for being shy because she never let me go out much . Mostly lack of socialization when younger .
Penis size has nothing to do with it. Since I am well endowed, but still shy. I hate when people point it out too.
You are correct TT, willie size does not necessarily relate to shiness
Mine in the flacid state is tiny and even erect is no monster yet I am not in the least shy with women. It is all about confidence and absolute certainty in the knowledge that I am capable of pleasing almost any woman :slong
Thanks guys alot of what u said has made me think
I know at least one woman it wouldn't matter if you were shy or not. I think if you two were alone, you'd have to cry RAPE! at hte top of your lungs to NOT get laid lol
I can approach strangers easily with a complement, a bit of help, a hi, or a contribution. But it was funny the other day, well theres this cashier that my roommates are trying to hook me up with cause they claim i she was hitting on me and distracted by me big time. I tried to give her my number but I had a bitch of a time when i finally worked up the courage she was gone. I was like a terrified little elf, i just was so awkward and uncomfortable
Maybe it is because it could be offered on a plate, sex with a random person. Maybe you are the sort that likes to strike a bond rather than have mindless one night stands.
I don't like one-night-stands being described as mindless. With the right people great sex can happen, but it takes the right people. Sometimes they are pretty average and empty, but sometimes relationship sex can be pretty average and empty too.
Prettypeter: younger Australian women these days can be forthright about sex when they want it, is this what you puts you off? I've met a few women like this in the recent past, my girl in Sydney for example, and I just went with her flow. It was contrary to the way I normally operated but if it was clear she wanted me, who was I to argue? I responded positively to her invitation, and she led me to her room.
Completely agree with you there. Sex can be an end in itself - it doesn't always have to lead to rings and marriage. In fact when a girl does go on about commitment and 'for ever after' I'm usually off like a shot.
Life's too short to commit to one woman no matter how wonderful and special she pretends to be.