Shy Girl Wants More

Discussion in 'Sexual Foreplay and Techniques' started by sheena86, Nov 30, 2006.

  1. sheena86

    sheena86 New Member

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    Okay me and my partner have been together for almost a year now and im also 5 months pregnant. Im very shy when it comes to sex and i feel like my partner is not wanting to be with me because of that. I need help as to what are some things that I could do in order to not be so shy around him? We usually only do a couple different positions and thats it (Missionary and Doggy Style) I want to show him that I care and that Im willing to try but Im really shy and get caught up in the moment when we try to do something new.Can someone give me some advise please! -Thanks!!!
     
  2. smallpackage

    smallpackage New Member

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    What are you shy about? Are you not comfortable with your body....do you feel like a dirty girl....what exactly makes you uncomfortable?
     
  3. sheena86

    sheena86 New Member

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    Im not sure exactly why Im shy, I guess Im always scared that I would make a fool out of myself or something.
     
  4. loveit247

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    You need to let yourself go, he is having sex with you which means you turn him on. But you can turn him on allot more if you are confident. Men love a woman who oozes sexual self esteem. Stop worrying about what you look like or what you are doing, just do what makes you feel sexy and the rest will follow.
     
  5. kissingworks

    kissingworks New Member

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    Good advice above. Try going to a large bookstore together and spend a few minutes browsing the sexuality shelves with him. He'll get the message that you're interested in exploring, and you'll likely leave the store with some new ideas if not a book or two to leave in your nightstand.
     
  6. Brad

    Brad New Member

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    Sheena

    When you said "i feel like my partner is not wanting to be with me because of that"..... I thought that was really sad.

    Is that thought just your perception of things or has your partner directly expressed any concerns?

    Have you always thought that way, or has it just been since falling pregnant? I ask that in the most genuine way, simply because pregnancy is an awesome event and it makes emotions run wild at times.

    First thing I would do is show him what you posted as it is so very genuinely worded.

    You sound a really genuine and nice person with great attitude.

    I can tell you from my personal (male) perspective, that I find shy girls very attractive.

    As has been said, sexual confidence is attractive, and even shy folks can learn to develop that. Then they become the true angels in my book!

    Your partner, if well suited to you, should be the ideal person to encourage your feelings of confidence by letting it be know that he loves you totally for whom and what you are, body and soul day and night.

    My advice to you would be to simply be yourself, and love yourself.

    In a few months time you will have the joys and challenges of a new baby. You have got some very special times ahead.

    Focus on your positive personal aspects and focus on the exciting times ahead.

    I hope you do well in all respects because you deserve to.
     
  7. Bluesy

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    Perfect wisdom, Brad :) I do think there's a causal relationship between the quality of the partnership and sexual confidence... But, of course, some people are just naturally very shy regardless of whom they're with. If I were you, I would read a few books, try to pick up some tips here and there (there's a lot of good stuff on SF). Believe that you have the ability to rock his world and believe that the next time you're in bed, you're going to take charge and show that guy just how great sex can be. Get yourself hyped up. Listen to some sexy music, dance, think about what an awesome sex goddess you are, let your body go... You can do it :)

    And forget being perfect. Be willing to goof up and laugh at yourself.
     
  8. SexyLoopy

    SexyLoopy New Member

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    its really weird for me when people meet me they think im the most confident person they have ever met because im always making people laugh. but once they get to know me they realise im quite shy,this is what my boyfriend found out about me on our first date. Once i got to know him my confidence around him grew a bit but i was still really shy around him, when it came to sex i was really worried about it (especially since it was my first time....sshhhh). Although i am still a bit shy around him i realised that he loves me alot and he must find me attractive otherwise he wouldn't be with me. So i know your shy but let go of your insecurities about him not wanting to be with you because if that was the case he wouldn't be with you now.

    Oh yeah about the sexual positions if you really want to show him you care why dont you try being on top and see what sort of reaction you get from him who knows it might boost your confidence and you both may get a thrill out of it.
     
  9. Rose

    Rose Resident Sexy Grandma
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    A previous virgin, having been with your S/O for not quite a year, and you are 5 months pregnant. That did not give you a lot of time to extract your erotic inner-self. You definitely are climbing up the rough side of the mountain, so to speak. But it can be done!

    Firstly, make sure you take enough time for YOURSELF to look and feel pretty. How you feel about yourself is going to play immensely into your ability to feel free and desirable. As your little belly expands, you need to take care to stay healthy, and this in turn will enable you to wear some of the cutest, and sexiest maternity clothes I think I've ever seen. Even the undergarments (lingerie, etc) is adorable.

    Positions: Missionary style is not going to work much longer anyway. I agree with the above - Cowgirl will be much more comfortable for both of you - then there is "spooning" if he is long enough to penerate vaginally from behind.

    How about trying just getting down in front of him, unzip his pants, and start a sexy, sultry blowjob. A woman initiating sex, even if you have to 'roleplay', is a real turn-on to most guys. Practice what you want to do or say while he is away at work or something. Allow yourself to 'hear' your voice saying those things. Getting used to it ahead of time will make it easier for you during the real thing.

    These are just a couple ideas. I'm sure there's a wealth of ideas coming your way from others on :sf! Good luck!
     
  10. cbrmale

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    I've personally been in this space with someone who was sexually giving, but shy of sex, and I got very drained by taking the initiative and making the moves on someone who was too passive by any standards.

    With the person I was with, I found out what her hang-up was in the end, and we were able to work at it. It was religion, she couldn't reconcile how sex is supposed to be bad and so on at one moment, and then okay the other. We conquered that by her understanding that God gave her a gift to share with her husband, and He would be proud of her using the gift to her utmost. We also hired some explicit couples educational videos, and the latter were the biggest breakthrough (Ordinary Couples, Extraordinary Sex I think). The videos were good because they were quite explicit, and they were ordinary couples like us having really good sex.

    The bottom line is men do like to be molested from time to time, to have their partner strip them, to have their partner push them on the bed and kiss them from head to foot, to have their partner take them in their mouth and get them hard and then get on top and then...

    It is less about the number of positions, and more about where your head is, just letting yourself go and being in one place and one place only for the next forty minutes or so. And for that time, the only thing that matters is his pleasure and yours. And if you do that, he'll love you more than you'll believe possible.
     
  11. juicyjenny

    juicyjenny New Member

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    There's no room for shyness in sex.

    There is no need to feel shy about asking for more from him sexually. Be bold and confident. Tell him you are more than willing to experiment on various sex positions. Variety is the spice of sex. Sure, you can pick very good advice from books. When you are at home, you can communicate your need for sex both directly, and by dressing provocatively. If he's man enough, he'll not fail to notice. Go for what you want sexually and stop feeling shy. There's no room for shyness in sex.
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    #11 juicyjenny, Jan 20, 2007
    Last edited by a moderator: Jan 21, 2007
  12. SexyScorp

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    Spend some time on yer own masturbating and really letting it go....when you orgasm scream out and let all your passions explode..

    Look in the mirror at yourself and see how beautiful you are...everyone has something very attractive...eyes, hair, breasts, belly...really look at what is good about you.

    Then dress up in something sexy and look again...and tell yourself how beautiful you are...

    Get confident with yourself first....and then, in no time, you will be confident with your lover....

    Good luck and enjoy :)