should i wait or say forget about finding mrs right?

Discussion in 'General Sex Discussion' started by Bobby3000, Sep 18, 2011.

  1. Bobby3000

    Bobby3000 Member

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    okay. i am a religious person. well not religious but really into philosophy. i am pretty much a devote buddhist. my tendencies in this regard has left me without ever having had sex. like i came close as a youngster but never did it. when i got into my late teens-early 20s i completely suppressed my desires. and while i gained a proper perception of things i didnt like how life felt. so i got my desires back :lol. but i have in me a thought while sex is good i should only have it with the woman i will live my whole life with and have little buddha kids. but there are no guarantees especially after how my last relationship went. i thought i found my soul mate. she played with my heart at least it feels like it but i still like her a lot despite how it went. but needless to say it made me think that i am wasting my time with this waiting for the perfect mate trash. fairy tales dont exist and i need to man up and stop being sensitive.

    i have a lot going for myself and know i would be good sexually as i am very very gifted if you know what i mean. but i struggle between these things. should i just forget about finding miss.right and just find miss.right now? i am still young and have a lot of time to make up but i dont want to be a womanizer and i want a real integrated relationship. i dont think i could have sex with a woman i cant connect with mentally and emotionally. im so dumb haha.

    any ideas? do soul mates even exist?
     
  2. hornyscot

    hornyscot New Member

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    yes, soulmates exist, but dont expect to find them straight away, it could take years and more than likely a few relationships in between, i say go for it, no point trying to save yourself for what may never happen, you dont have to be a womaniser to have had a few relationships. good luck for the future.
     
  3. Maverick

    Maverick Member

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    I say forget, because there will never be someone who is Mrs. Right for anyone. It's a pipe dream force fed to us by our ancestors.

    You can find someone you are compatible with, but you won't find Mrs. Right.
     
  4. pbs

    pbs
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    If you're looking for a soul mate, the best way to approach her is with complete honesty. You'll very likely know when you find her, but even if you get it wrong a time or two, better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all.
     
  5. Maverick

    Maverick Member

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    I heard that a lot growing up, better to love and lost........and I never asked, what is love?? Maybe I should make a thread. ;)
     
  6. pbs

    pbs
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    Sorry that you haven't found her, and it's natural to generalize that our experiences are the same as everyone else. Mrs. Right is that woman who needs what you have to offer, is offering what you need, and is willing to let go of the unimportant stuff if you will too.
     
  7. Maverick

    Maverick Member

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    Don't be sorry for me. LOL. I'm very happy in my life, very happy being a slut, very happy not having the responsibilities, very happy being "selfish" (only was called that recently, and it's so far off who I am, but it's funny to me), and very happy with everything.

    And I don't generalize. I found Mrs. Right, but I wasn't ready at the time, and me, myself, blew that away. So I've been there, done that, which is why I usually only post in threads I have some idea what I'm talking about.

    Is there a Mrs. Right out there for the OP??? Possible, but in my life experiences, I wouldn't waste my time thinking or looking for her. If it's the right time, it will show up on the door step. Until then, enjoy life. :)
     
  8. Bobby3000

    Bobby3000 Member

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    thanks for this post. wait years and years... doesnt sound like a good prospect. i want children and all but not when i am too old. i wish i had been more outgoing in high school probably could have had a high school sweetheart and still be with her today.
     
  9. Bobby3000

    Bobby3000 Member

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    :lol maverick in with the crushing reality.
     
  10. Untamed

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    Have you seen the movie "Ghosts of girlfriends past"? I know pretty lame to make a movie comparison. He took his uncles advice and look where he wound up. Took him years of promiscuity before he realized it wasn't what he himself really wanted.

    Be respectful and honest to women, be reserved until you feel a connection and when you do, go for it.

    Mrs. Right is out there. She comes in the form of a loving, caring, compatible and attractive (in your eyes) woman. When you find her hold on to her and cherish her as much as you can. As time is precious :)

    a little side story: My ex-husbands granddad who's wife of 65 years passed away 3 years ago .. is getting re-married at the age of 84 years old. He's so happy and has so much life in him. It's really refreshing to see him so happy :)

    I hope you eventually find the one Bobby. You are young don't give up!
     
  11. Maverick

    Maverick Member

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    True, to an extent. Be respectful, sure, but be yourself. Fuck being reserved. Go for what you want, when you want it.

    This is a lie. There's people in your life that you have loved and will love, and not one of them is or will be Mrs Right. She comes as a caring, loving, compatible and attractive woman??? Ok, Untamed, so why aren't you my Mrs. Right?? :eyes
     
  12. Untamed

    Verified Gold Member

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    To each their own :) I also said until you feel a connection sometimes it doesn't take long for that to happen


    Maybe I was Mrs. Right now? opposed to Mrs. Right? plus I live so far away and I came with baggage remember lol
     
  13. Maverick

    Maverick Member

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    LOL. Whatever you wish to say. :)
     
  14. nyxx

    nyxx New Member

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    you're not dumb. i can't do one night stands, i just can't into a girl that quickly. there isn't anything wrong with it, just some people are just physically attracted while others are driven more by the emotional aspect. niether is right or wrong, stop beating yourself up. i'm not going to sit here and preach about religion or soulmates, its like trying to explain the universe and its insanity. some people find people who they truly love and appear to be soulmates, others will never have that.

    you won't be a womanizer to be with woman for short periods of time. the older you get the more you'll realize that your partners will have been with other people. its inevitable. even people who wait till marriage and such, if they get divorced thats still some else. just live your life day to day man. there are events that will shape your life and events that will define a moment. sex is a moment, just stay safe and enjoy.

    i told me teacher in grade 4 that i felt self concious all the time, she simply said "in 50 years, who's going to remember?" have fun buddy, don't get regretful
     
  15. cbrmale

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    Nyxx,
    Those of us who do one night stands might well be attracted to the emotional aspects of our partners just as much as you are, but the real difference might be that we can build a deep and beautiful emotional connection in a matter of minutes, or maybe an hour. I have met a few men who do and did what I have done, and we all had this in common, the ability to find and reveal the inward beauty of our partners. By nature I'm introverted, but I do operate very well in extroverted mode, and when it comes to one-time sex than I'm really, really extroverted and she is really, really loved, adored, worshipped and more!

    Back to the OP. I don't believe in waiting, as the future is uncertain and the end is always near. There are soulmates, I'm married to one so I know, but in the meantime there is much pleasure to be had. I think the worst thing in life, especially when tragedy happens, would be to look back and think 'I wish I had'. So, by all means, search for your soulmate, but don't deny yourself in the meantime.

    This is where one-night stands are great (if you have my personality type). Great sex but no relationship. No broken hearts, but a splendid time is had by all. What I wouldn't do is have a long-term romantic relationship with someone I didn't care for.
     
    #15 cbrmale, Sep 20, 2011
    Last edited: Sep 20, 2011
  16. backcheck64

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    Yes soulmates exist. I found mine. Went through 46 other women to find her, but they exist. Together 29 yrs now.
     
  17. teacher88123

    teacher88123 New Member

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    I think sometimes it's all about karma.. if you are a good person and just live your life there will be someone somewhere and at a caertain time you will meet. just try to live your life and think with your heart :)
     
  18. almostthere

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    I too found my sould mate. Early in life but none the less I can't picture my world without her <even though right now id like to kick her butt, kidding>
    As for experimenting before that I say yes. Dating and having a sexual relation does not make you a womanizer. Treating woman like crap and using them for sex only would not be a good thing. I had relationships, sexual, with a a few woman other than my wife and im glad I did. I wasn't like most of my friends just screwing to screw. I actullay had an emotional/connection to just about every woman I've been with. Not saying ther wasn't any druken one nighters, but very few
     
  19. TheMotion

    TheMotion New Member

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    Religion can be good.
    Buddhism can be good.
    Soul mates can be great (I've got one).
    Time is limited.
    Life is good.
    My advice: get a grip and get laid. Your bringing so much baggage you might even want to pay for the first one or 10.
     
  20. McGumby

    McGumby New Member

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    I'm with my best friend. We liked each other from the start. We lived across the street from each other in our early 20's. I won't call it love at first site, but we liked each other. She has become my soul mate and we've been together for almost 20 years. I definitely believe in soul mates. I have a male best friend (platonic) that I consider to be a soul mate. We've been friends for 33 years. But as a fellow spiritual buy, sort of Buddhist, I figure you gotta meet a soul mate in one life or another, right? I met my friend many lifetimes ago, I am sure. My wife, this might be the first time, maybe not.

    You might have a soul mate, maybe several, but you might not be destined to find them in this life or you may find them in a way you don't expect (friend, dog, parent or child). There are 6 billion souls on the planet! Maybe in this life you're here to find a new soul mate or to just love the one you're with. Remember, nothing is perfect and if you are expecting perfection in a mate, you will never be satisfied.