Sex questions???

Discussion in 'Sex and Relationships' started by mcbean, Jun 3, 2006.

  1. mcbean

    mcbean New Member

    Joined:
    Sep 24, 2004
    Messages:
    48
    Likes Received:
    0
    Ok I posted some stuff b4 bout not havin sex b4 marriage and now my gf has cut down the sentence from 1 year of no sex to jus 6 months but I jus had some general questions about sex i wanted some peoples thoughts on.

    So i was wondering how important is sex in a relationship, like:
    1.Does a relationship need sex?
    2.Can we progress without it?
    3.wud it be right to break up because of a sex issue?
    4.Can you love som1 with having sex with them?
    5.How long cud u last with out sex?


    Any input wud help heaps thanks:sex
     
  2. Rose

    Rose Resident Sexy Grandma
    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Feb 8, 2005
    Messages:
    6,823
    Likes Received:
    12
    Gender:
    Female
    Location:
    Dixie Land
    1. I don't think a relationship absolutely, positively, has to involve sex to work. There are many instances where , for one reason or another, sex is not an option. If you are looking at a temporary 'no sex' time, then - no I don't think your relationship needs sex now.

    2. Of course you can progress without it. Actually, many relationships get bogged down with the introduction of sexual activity too early. It becomes the focal point, and other very important aspects go unaddressed. Sexual activity too soon could hinder your progress.

    3. It depends on how important sex is to each of you. Your g/f just may not have the same interest in sex as you do ... so are YOU able to handle that.

    4. I believe you can love someone without sex, but there is something to be said about making yourself totally vulnerable and intimate toward someone else. Again, if it for a 'season', sure... but if you are talking very long-term..or never...? :whoa

    5. Being in my present state of high libido, maybe 6 - 7 days. But I will probably masturbate before that.

    McBean, I think one of the most important things you need to remember is to never, NEVER, NEVER enter into a relationship thinking you can change someone in time. If things are not gelling (sp?) at a normal rate, there is the possibility that it may not work out at all. To paraphrase one of Brad's posts in the other thread, it's better to find out on this side of marriage. Otherwise, you may feel trapped or cheated.
     
  3. Krof

    Krof New Member

    Joined:
    Apr 20, 2006
    Messages:
    168
    Likes Received:
    0
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Sweden
    A relationship with a person that isn't within your family and you don't have sex... I would call that friendship
     
  4. kbate

    kbate New Member

    Joined:
    Dec 20, 2004
    Messages:
    571
    Likes Received:
    1
    1.Does a relationship need sex?

    Most relationships benefit from inclusion of sexual contact, although 'need' is an absolute term and probably does not apply. I do not believe I would enter into a relationship without the possibility of sex, at least I have not to this date.

    2.Can we progress without it?

    Of course, but only if both of you are of the same mind as towards your intent. If one of you desires sex and the other refuses, your relationship will not survive.

    3.would it be right to break up because of a sex issue?

    Absolutely. Sexual frustration is a vaild reason for breakup.

    4.Can you love someone with having sex with them?

    Yes, but I will not enter a long term relationship without the possibility or certainty of sexual contact.


    5.How long could you last with out sex?

    Impossible to tell, probably forever - but I am not willing to experiment and I do not permit sex to become an issue.

    ***



    Any input wud help heaps thanks:sex[/QUOTE]
     
  5. Logger

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Dec 6, 2003
    Messages:
    1,214
    Likes Received:
    45
    Gender:
    Male
    Some Questions come to mind:

    A. How good are your foreplay and massage techniques?

    B. What are the limits she sets now for petting?

    C. What are your powers that impress her?

    D. What powers does she feel you fall short on, for her ideal man?

    E. It seems to me, that if you turn her on, that she would want to do everything she could, to turn you on.What is she willing to do to turn you on?

    F. How does she feel abut your masturbating while petting with her?

    G. Have you read up on all the foreplay techniques under Foreplay?

    H. Is this gal psychologically hung up about sex? Have you had her checked by a counselor? Is she willing to get checked by a counselor?

    I. Is this Lady condescending to you, and just waiting for Mr. Right to come along?

    J. What Emotionally, Behavioral constructs are you setting up, that give your lady this kind of dictatorial power? What other powers is she exercising in the relationship?

    K. Would it be better to admit that this lady feels she is above your class, and make the effort to find a girl friend that feels you are a great person?
     
  6. igor

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Jan 13, 2006
    Messages:
    4,110
    Likes Received:
    163
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Chicago area
    I second that. I have read in many cases where each partner's sex drive was so much different that there was no way they could be happy together. Things will not change just because you get married. So I would say it is important to know, as much as you possibly can how much you desire sex, before you get married. Talk, Talk, and talk.......

    Kind of the opposite of your situation - I have seen where a couple has frequent sex before marriage, then after they get married one of them says, "now that I have you, I am not that interested in sex so I don't want to do it".
     
  7. Miki

    Miki Banned

    Joined:
    Jun 30, 2006
    Messages:
    483
    Likes Received:
    0
    Gender:
    Female
    Location:
    Algoma, ON
    I'm not saying a word... :( Too loser