Sex - How long?

Discussion in 'Sex and Relationships' started by JBay, Aug 2, 2003.

  1. JBay

    JBay New Member

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    i'm still a virgin but i've got a question for you all, it might sound a little old fashioned but: how long into the relationship do you wait to have sex? or do you think one should just wait till they're married?

    edit: typo
     
  2. refresh

    refresh Contributer

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    How has this thread gotten 1200 views? :eek
     

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  3. JBay

    JBay New Member

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    lol, didn't know this was moved here...

    refresh: ya... people just flock to see my threads, i can't help it :D oh, and funny pic too lol!
     
  4. acidrain47

    acidrain47 New Member

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    i guess i'll agree and say when you're ready..and it also depends on what type of relationship you're looking for...most people say in order to last you need to hold off...but i do know couples who had sex the first night and seemed to last....with my first bf i didn't have sex at all..and that was 2 years...maybe i was a prude...but he wasn't exactly the nicest person....my second bf i waited about 6 months...my first.....the guy i'm dating now....i met him on a monday...we fooled around that friday...i say kinda sorta had sex but not really...then i guess it was about a month we did the full blown thing...
     
  5. Samurai

    Samurai New Member

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    I think you should wait; sex should be a bonus of the relationship, not the basis (speaking from personal experience)
     
  6. elevation24

    elevation24 New Member

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    We didn't start having sex until 5 or 6 months into the relationship. Get this, it was his doing, not mine :eek I think usually it is the other way around. Mainly because of the fear of pregnancy.

    I am glad we waited and I agree with Samurai, it should be a bonus of the relationship rather than the basis.

    But I also agree with acidrain that it depends on the kind of relationship that you are looking for.
     
  7. sweeetest

    sweeetest New Member

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    well i was 14 waited 2 months he was my first and we have been together for 13 years and i was his first
     
  8. acidrain47

    acidrain47 New Member

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    i do agree with waiting, you want to be sure that's not what the relationship is based solely on....if you have sex too early, one or both partners will question that...so in all...i think it's an individual decision....
    and i do disagree with just the point blank you should wait....there are always extenuating circumstances, and you really should be more open....it's like ending an opinion with a "that's what you should do" you have to be more conscious i guess and accept that others have different views...that's what makes it so exciting..
     
  9. Billman

    Billman New Member

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    Apparently.. at warp speed is enough for some people. I like to be ready.. I don't share myself with someone, until I know they are ready too.
     
  10. Donia

    Donia New Member

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    I was with my first husband for 15 years and we had sex on our second date. I've been with my current husband for almost 3 years and we did it on our first. lol Different things work for different people, I guess.
     
  11. Brad

    Brad New Member

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    I think as demonstrated by previous postings, the only important thing is that you have first sex only when Both of you are ready for it.

    It doesn't matter one jot whether that is a few days or months.

    All that matters is that you both feel that the time is right.
     
  12. Dreama

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    My fiance and I were in our relationship for about a month when we started having sex. We've been together for a year and five months, so it wasn't detrimental to our relationship, and I think it really helped our self confidences.
     
  13. nerdcore86

    nerdcore86 New Member

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    My boyfriend and I were both virgins when we entered our relationship. We went about three months before actually having sex, but we were intimate with each other almost as soon as we started going out. We've been together almost a year and a half, and we're still very happy. Good luck! :)
     
  14. Acid7711

    Acid7711 New Member

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    I think it depends on the relationship and the partners involved. You can't go with what anyone here says because it's not right for YOU. The choice has to be a mutual one between both of you, and if not done right, it could ruin things/make things weird.
     
  15. Jayce

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    My girlfriend and I started "messing around" 7 months into our relationship, which would of made us both 16 years old at the time. We never had intercourse until 3 and a half years later, and even that was short lived because we both decided that we're both in college and there are more important things to worry about. We agreed that until she is on birth control and I have a stockpile of condoms (which she is considering getting on the pill), that we would just stick to doing "everything but sex" (oral + handjobs). That is something I am completely fine with... because...

    I will share a little personal experience about sex, coming straight from a 20 year old himself. When my girlfriend and I had sex, we just had condoms. I must say, I have MORE fun when we are just 69ing and messing around as opposed to having sex, because when we are just messing around, we're still cautious about not having any fluids touch places that it shouldn't, but it just seems so much safer... which allows for more time to have fun, instead of having to check the condom every so often. Which is why we agreed that until we're using the pill/condom, we'll stick to that only. I wish some other folks out there would consider using this method, then people that her and I know personally may not be sitting at home for a few months waiting for that baby to pop out. :(
     
  16. Rose

    Rose Resident Sexy Grandma
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    I know some 40 year olds that should heed your advice, Jayce!
     
  17. Acid7711

    Acid7711 New Member

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    Aye, I myself am another big fan of doubling up on the protection. I'm not so concerned about the fluid thing because i know where both her and I have been, but I am NOT ready for a kid right now. I've seen way too many of my friends (no offense to anyone who may have had this happen) but ruin their lives and chances for a decent future because they had a kid at a really young age. It almost kills the oppertunity to continue onward with schooling and education and yeah....
     
  18. dojo

    dojo New Member

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    Always waited for at least 1-2 months for this. I only had 3 BFs, but I'd do this again if needed. I am not for one night stands and I am not that easy to get to the bed from the first day :)