Safe words

Discussion in 'Sexual Fetishes and Fantasies' started by HotForHoney, May 13, 2015.

  1. HotForHoney

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    Do you have one?
    What is it?

    Mine is spaghetti. :)
     
  2. Cappy_Dick

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    These have always been partner specific in my world. I always have the lady choose the word, so there is no mistake. The last one was "buttons". I have no clue why.

    xx
     
  3. Doitagain

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    Ya know......never had one. Only dabbled in bdsm personally so it never came up with one....and you don't need one as a voyeur ;-)
     
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  4. whybother

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    "No" has always sufficed for the wife and me.
     
  5. Cappy_Dick

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    It's not just for D/s play. Safe words are always good, especially with a new partner. Gives you the freedom to explore, with the ability to stop if something isn't right for someone. I've found with proper use of a safe word, the crossing of an unknown line can be stopped without evaporating the mood.

    xx
     
  6. Cappy_Dick

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    I'm glad this works well for you, but I don't recommend it for most. Firstly, because "no" is one of the most used words in the language. Secondly, in consensual sex, no doesn't always mean no. A safe word that normally wouldn't be uttered during sex is a much better way to go.

    xx
     
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  7. whybother

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    I guess I was being facetious. we have never had a safe word and never felt the need for one.

    I understand what your saying about "no" Certainly, I can remember my wife in the throes of impending orgasm gasping "no, no, no" as opposed to her more common "YES, YES, YES" but years of communication and trust allow me to understand her body her reactions.

    But as the father of two college aged sons I will tell you that I have told them that "no" always means "no". It is as non negotiable as wearing a condom. Maybe it's the lawyer in me, but consent is nothing to be vague about. Better to risk losing an orgasm because someone says "no" during sex than to risk a rape allegation, (or actually being guilty of rape). I think safe words are for long term committed relationships or for real bdsm situations.
     
  8. whybother

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    we can agree to disagree on this.
     
  9. HotForHoney

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    You should teach them only yes means yes. Seems to be the new school approach.
     
  10. HotForHoney

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    You should make that your signature!
     
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  11. Cappy_Dick

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    Quite.jpg
    xx
     
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  12. whybother

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    They went to private school. Never took new math.
     
  13. billytk1977

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    Now i am hungry......
     
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  14. Mittimer

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    With my husband and I it's "poodle" only because it's amusing to us both. With play partners we use the stop light method. "Green" is good to go, "Yellow" is coming up on a limit and slow a bit "Red" is stop the scene and give me a minute to breathe.
     
  15. minskminx

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    Pterodactyl. :D

    Never use it ;)
     
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  16. johnnyangel694u

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    Get the fuck away from me.
     
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  17. 10_3XL

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    "Bubbles"

    Mostly because, even if we're in the middle of it, one or both of us will start laughing uncontrollably when we hear/say "Bubbles."

    Seriously - find an angry or serious way to say the word "bubbles" and I'll give you a trophy. I'm convinced it's impossible.
     
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  18. whybother

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    Not sure if this is off topic but how often do you guys use your safe words?
     
  19. Mittimer

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    Exactly as often as they are needed.
     
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  20. whybother

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    That was a very fast non answer