Risque DVD's for Married Couples

Discussion in 'Sex and Relationships' started by Logger, Aug 23, 2005.

  1. Logger

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    My wife objects to hard porn. There seems to be many choices for hard porn, and many choices for fully clothed actors. There don't seem to be many choices for arouosing DVD's, wtihout the hard porn.

    Ideas?
     
  2. Thorn

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    I have commented on that before on sexualforums.com also. I like a movie to have some plot in it. I still want it to have xxx sex but with some story line inbetween. There isn't much out there or I'm looking in the wrong places. :ugh
     
  3. Logger

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    REGION CODES

    I looked on eBay, and I have discovered that All Sony DVD players are coded to read only one speed of frame progression.

    Region 1: US and Canada
    Region 2: Europe and England
    Region 3: Asia
    Region: All or Universal


    There is a little world symbol on the back of DVD's, near the bottom, with a 1 in it, if sold inthe US.

    DVD's from Region 2 or Region 3 give an Error Message: "Playback prohibitied by Area Limitations".

    The Region Code is on the back of the DVD Player.

    I am develping some search terms for shopping eBay. I have 3 bids on some DVD's that look promising. Time will tell.

    Experiences? Ideas?
     
  4. Logger

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    More Regional Codes:


    Region 1: US and Canada
    Region 2: Europe and England
    Region 3: Asia
    Region 4: Australia, New Zealand
    Region: All or Universal


    I'd like to find some videos with bouncing boobs. Like playing Volley ball.

    I have ordered additons to my DVD collection as follows:

    FIRE IN THE VALLEY and VULVA MASSAGE DVD's, from Tantra. com

    ULTIMATE SEXUAL MASSAGE LOVING SEX SERIES EROTIC DVD, as a Buy it Now from eBay.

    I ordered a two DVD set of Tiniest Bikini contests. Those were Buy it Now from eBay.

    I already had: THE JOY OF MASSAGE DVD, from Tantra. com
    and ELVIRA'S HAUNTED HILLS, which has a PG 13 rating.

    I am not doing a good job of shopping for bargains, an putting in low ball bids.

    I have some VHS massage tapes, but my wife likes to watch her VHS tapes. I have a DVD player, and a second TV. I can puty whatever images on my TV, without interfering with her watching TV, while we lie in bed. I guess I could get a combination DVD and VHS player, or another VHS player. But the VHS tapes I have are not really that great. So I am continuing shopping for Risque Tapes.

    Last night, I played the Vulva massage portion of THE JOY OF MASSAGE DVD in slow motion.

    My wife complained that I spent $60.00 some 6 months ago, for a VHS tape and the JOY OF MASSAGE DVD. I explained that it was just buildng up a collection over time, not like a monthly expense. I am posting my purchases as part of a strategy to manage any addictive type behavior of over-spending. I still have $30 to $40 outstanding bids on eBay. I sent a question on one DVD I found, so at least I can be more sure what I am getting, because the titles and descriptions are not always clear.

    Blessings
     
    #4 Logger, Aug 23, 2005
    Last edited: Aug 23, 2005
  5. Logger

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    eBay Mistakes:

    I have been shopping massage videos on e-Bay. Here are some of the mistakes I have either made, or almost made.

    1. Look closely at the title of the DVD, make sure I don't already have that DVD, or on VHS.

    2. The adult section DVD's are erratic. Sometimes I can get in, sometimes I can't.

    3. When I send a question to a seller, I sometimes forget to check the box at the bottom, to send myself a copy of the E-mail I sent to the seller.

    4. I should write down the expiration time of the bid I make, on my pocket calendar, so I can manage the bid in the last few minutes before the bid closes.

    5. Enter a Maximum bid, but don't make it too high, if there is several days time left before the bid closes.

    6. I should not get caught up in a feeling of a sense of urgency, because that clouds my thinking, and allows me to over-spend.

    7. Before spending the full value for a DVD, I should be more sure that there are not more sumptuous DVD's out there.

    8. Before entering a Buy it Now Bid, look at the seller's other items, because shipping/insurance/tracking is an expense, and expenditure of my time and energy, so try to buy more stuff at one time. (Spaced out over weeks and months, though)

    9. I should send questions, but avoid bidding until I am sure. I have only been looking at risque DVD's on e-Bay for a few days. I have made more bids and buys, that probably justified.

    10. When I feel my intensity blocking out other activities, I should shut down the computer. I should probably set up a timer to chck other things before spending too much time on eBay.

    11. If the Region is not clearly marked, send the seller a question about the region designation.

    More pitfalls?
     
  6. Logger

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    More eBay Mistakes:

    12. Some DVD's are posted for sale every few days on eBay, so there is no rush to buy those DVD's I should look the repeaters over, and ask questions, and be more certain that I want them.

    13. Some DVD's are offered by a private person, and are from a private collection, and may not become available again for some time. Some DVD's bein sold by a private individual are also available from a Web or retailer, or can be ordered from a Video store, so there is no real urgency to get anything but a minimal, bargain bid.

    14. My wife may raise objections to some DVD's My wife's objections seem to be less criticizing as it gets later, toward morning. I am considering a chart to make from a large self-sticking lable, to put on the plastic case envelope:

    10
    11
    12
    1
    2
    3
    4


    Then I will mark the chart for that DVD with an X at the time I receive a criticism on that video. I do not plan to argue with my wife. I will just put the DVD away, if she objects, and mark down the time of her objection. When I am selecting a Risque DVD, I will look to see what time it is, and what videos I have not had objections for, at that time. I may mark down certain scene selections she objects to at what time, to better understand. I can visualize some X's being marked down.

    15. I am trying to compromise with my wife. However I forsee a disagreement, as my wife has bought furniture for the living room and dining room, over my objections, that is not functional for people to enjoy themsleves. I use the basement for studi]ying my iterests. My wife has formed the idea that she would like to have the basement to entertain her friends, becasue she has made the living room un livable. My interst for my retirement is to pursue my interests, not to give up a substantial amount of my space. More challenges await my married existance.

    16. I need to remember to update my writing, SAVE CHANGES, within the 180 Minute LimItation on editing. Some of my writing in this post is now better thought out, as it is the second draft.

    17. I am not a patient person. I have ordered some 8 DVD's, but they wil be trickling in over 2 to 3 weeks. I will attempt to turn my attention to other matters. I tend to get stuck, just waiting for a package to arrive, checking, getting tracking numbers, and re-checking. I will try to be productive in other matters.


    Further pitfalls?
     
    #6 Logger, Aug 24, 2005
    Last edited: Aug 24, 2005
  7. Logger

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    Further eBay Mistakes:

    18. My orignal idea when starting this thread was that it would be difficult to find the ultra soft porn that I was looking for. Actually I have found a wider selection than I realized was available. So I bought more than I should have, without being selective, and now I need to start managing my bidding/buying better.

    19. eBay has an Icon at the top right of some listings, which says, WATCH THIS ITEM. There is a section in My Ebay that says Item You Are Watching. About 1/3 of the items I clicked on, WATCH THIS ITEM, actaully got listed in ITEMS YOU ARE WATCHING in My eBay. So I have to devise a means to get back to items I am not ready to bid on. Once I have bid on an item, then it goes on my bid list, but I am trying to cut back on bidding. I have three outstanding bids now.


    More Pitfalls?
     
  8. Logger

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    eBay Offereings for Erotic videos softer than XXX.

    I have found some bikini contests and Female Bodybuilder swimsuit contests. I have found some Topless and Erotic Dancing videos, Aerobic Striptease and topless exercise videos. So I have tried to compromise with my wife by finding ertotic movies without actual sex. I have put in some effort to learn to work eBay. I have also ordered a couple more Tantric Vulva massage videos.

    My wife seems to be less concerned about which videos I watch as it gets later. Also as she becomes more drowsy, she lets her eyes close halfway, and stops paying attention to the TV's. After a while she just opens her eyes occasionally. The there is a stage when she has her eyes mostly closed, and opens her eyes when she starts to change positons or turn to her other side in bed. So I am trying to understand what levels of objection she has at what stage, and switch to various sections of the video.

    Lately I found a preview section on the Joy of Massage DVD, that has a Female Superior position. The Lady is on top, topless, and my wife has not objected to that scene yet. The shot does not emphasize the crotch area, so the scene looks more like a topless lady riding a horse.

    Other ideas for compromise?
     
  9. Logger

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    Show Girl Stratgies:

    So I am expanding my erotic collection. I have some bathing suit contest DVD's now. Some erotic Show Girl contests.

    So what really kills me, is when I am enjoying an erotic video, and my wife starts making moralistic, make-wrong comments, like, "You are such a pervert. I can't stand it when you watch that suff. You are really balspheming Jesus and God."

    BUT NOW, I suggest comments that could be less hurtful and more appropriate:

    20. Could you change to an erotic video that does not have graphic shots of hard sex acts?

    21. Could you change to an erotic video that has more massage than caressing?

    22. Could you change to an erotic video that does not show male privates?

    23. Could you switch to an erotic video that is topless instead of full nudity?

    24. Could you switch to an erotic video that has less skimpy bikini Bathing Suits?

    25. Could you switch to an erotic video where the women are not jiggling their breasts quite so violently?


    Or when some Make Wrong comments comes form W, I could respond, based upon the type of film I had on,

    26. For XXX: So you would prefer an erotic video that does not have hard sex for now?

    27. For X: So you would prefer an erotic video that does not have lovers caressing each other so passionately right now?

    28. For Male Privates: So you would prefer an erotic video that does not show male privates?

    29. For Nude Women: So you would prefer that I watch an erotic video which does not have women completely nude?

    30. For Topless: So you would prefer that I put on an erotic video that is not topless?

    31. For Thin Bikinis: So you would prefer that I watch an erotic video that does not have such thin bikinis?

    32. For Shaking Boobs: So you would prefer that I watch an erotic video where the women are not shaking their boobs so violently?

    33. For Vegas Strip Club Videos: So you would prever that I watch videos of London Strip clubs instead of Vegas Strip Clubs?

    34. For London Strip Club Videos: So you would prefer I watch Japanese strip club videos?

    35. For Swimsuit Videos: So, you would prefer an erotic video of Lingereie displays instead of bathing suits?

    MAYBE PART OF THE KEY IS BEING RESPONSIVE. If w has an objection, I can show that I am listening to her, buy switching out the DVD. Maybe I need a 25 DVD player with a remote changer. Now I have to get up to change the DVD. But Getting up shows I am listening to her. As long as I have something erotic, I am happy. XXX is cheap and available, and i have had 2 XXX DVD's for years, and that is all I needed.

    Now I have spent $300.00 on an ultra soft erotic video collection.

    STAGES OF WATCHING EROTIC MOVIES:

    When I first come home, W is in and out of the bedroom. I need to keep my TV turned far enough sideways, so that others, like my son, cannot see what is on the TV, if W opens our bedroom door.

    There are stages of Erotic Video Watching:

    36. W going in and out of the bedroom.

    37. W Mostly staing in bedroom, but may go out occasionally for something.

    38. W planning to stay in the bedroom for the rest of the night.


    GENERAL ANSWERS TO BLIND SIDE SCATTER GUN OBJETIONS:

    39. Well what I would like is to pretend that I stopped by the strip club on the way home, but actaully be home.

    40. Well when I get home, I would like to relax for a while, but I want to be considerate of your changing levels of extending cooperation.

    41. First, let me hear all the things that are less than ideal, from your standpoint. Let's take 10 minutes, for me to beter understand your concerns. Then let us put our dissatisfactions aside, and try to enjoy ourselves for the rest of the evening, as we go to sleep.

    Better planning?
     
    #9 Logger, Aug 29, 2005
    Last edited: Aug 29, 2005
  10. Logger

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    So I asked my wife, a couple weeks ago, if she though that if I hod some softer erotic videos, if she would have less objection, to my watching my erotic video picture while she watched her movies with sound, at around the 12 1 AM range.. Wife replied that was a good idea.

    So I spent more than a reasonable amouint of time and money, got some nudes, topless and bikini DVD's. I asked my wife if it was OK to put on Sports Illustrated Swimsuit DVD around midnight. W said OK, but then started finding fault with the SI Swimsuit DVD. "Are those girls 18? The way they are showing off is disgusting! Just wait till I go to sleep after 2 AM and put on whatever your want." So my whole idea was to have an erotic DVD collection to enjoy earlier, before 2 AM, seems to have run into a Hurdle, if not a Road Block.

    Live and Learn.
     
  11. Logger

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    WARMING UP FOR RISQUE VIDEOS:

    Generally, an effort should be mande to show love for my wife, and be sure that any undresolved issues are in a dormant status.

    If there are any seethign issues, then the condition of a loving feeling has not been established

    Spcific Preparations:

    After Shave.
    Back Rub.
    Wife's Pants off
    Lube on Clit.
    Wife's pussy hair recently trimmed.
    Wife's hand on my Penis for a while.
    Work the Leg and Foot muscles.
    Nipples sucked for a good while.
    Baby Oil on hand.
    Erected for 10 minutes

    After these preparations, then an erotic movie can be started, it is late enough.




    Blessings
     
  12. MrK40

    MrK40 New Member

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    My wife objects to anything suggestive let alone any nudity.
     
  13. Rose

    Rose Resident Sexy Grandma
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    I thoroughly enjoy a good adult flick, especially right before we have sex. I have even found an internet movie rental service that has a good amount of porn with a plot. The acting is relatively "B", but I don't enjoy the "Git 'er done" type of porn flicks, so I endure the bad acting.
    While watching, I get really horny, and then when we get into it, I enjoy fantasizing about scenes in the movie.
     
  14. Logger

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    Dear Rose,

    Now I realize that I should have made sure that the lady I asked to marry me, also ejoyed porn.

    Live and learn.
     
  15. Rose

    Rose Resident Sexy Grandma
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    Ahhh - but when Thorn & I married, I did NOT like porn. As I became more comfortable with my own sexuality, I became more open to other people's sexuality. It was a growing process.
     
  16. Logger

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    Dear Rose,

    I am working on enhancing some of my wife's feelings of self-confidence. One recently-developed theory is that a bad habit can be supported by an inadequate self-image. So by improving the particular asect of self-esteem involved, the person's habits can improve. So all I need to do is to improve my wife's comfort/confidence level in her sexuality, and she will be OK with porn, Right?

    Here are some NLP references I just puyt on the Web Reference Thread:
    http://sexualforums.com/talk/showthread.php?p=17279#post17279

    The neurosmantics site has the latest info on habit changing by image enhancement.

    I wanted to show a friend the DVD at his small retail shop, so he could see how to improve the habits of several of his employees. I had wanted to buy a small DVD portable player, so I found a 7 Inch Sanyo on sale at Circuit City for $180.00 I used the portable DVD player to show my friend some of the Habit Changing DVD.

    I showed the portabvle, battery operated DVD player to my wife. She smiled, and said, "Now you can play your Massage DVD's..."

    I guess maybe if porn is on a small screen, it is OK with her, Maybe?

    Maybe I can position the 7 Inch DVD player, somewhere that I can see it, but she won't be viewing it.

    I am not sure what my wife's thinking is, but I will continue exploring my new 7 Inch approach.

    Ideas?
     
  17. Logger

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    My wife is sometimes watching TV, when I would like to watch my Bouncing/jiggling DVD's. So I need to get her agreement to wach some fun, instad of drama. My second TV has stopped working, and I have not replaced it.

    So my phrases could be:

    Are you near the end of a chapter in your video?

    Could we get on an imaginary airplane and go to Las Vegas to watch a show?

    Could we pretend we are stopping by a private massage parlor? I have some massage videos we could try.

    Do you think you might be coming to a stopping place in your video soon? How Long?

    Bettter phrasing for questions?