My wife and I have been married for 8 years. I'm 46 and She's 41. Second marriage for both of us. She and I each have 2 kids. After we married, I adopted her oldest daughter. For the first 4 years or so, our sexual relationship seemed to be great. We had sex a couple of times a week, and were into trying new things, and some health exploration. We would often plan and spend long evenings with wine, bath, massages, and lots of foreplay. About three years ago, about the time her oldest daughter was graduating from HS, things began to change. Gradually, she started to lose interest in sex. Now, she rarely is interested in sex. When I initiate it, she seems mostly disinterested, and is not really "into it". Usually, it seems like me simply taking an opportunity to meet a need. Often, when we do have sex, I try to stretch it out, with prolonged foreplay, she seems impatient, like she simply wants to get it done. She has told me that when I want sex, I should just tell her, and we can have a quick episode, without all the foreplay. She really has a hard time getting excited, her wetness is very low (we now mostly have to use a lube), and has a hard time reaching orgasm. She says that her libido is simply changing, and she's getting older, and sex is just not so important anymore. She says it could be the onset of menapause. I'm really not convinced that's it. She is definitely struggling with the difficulty of having our daughter and grand-daughter temporarily living with us (son-in-law is away at Navy boot camp). She often says that when our daughter moves out, things will get "back to normal", and she'll be able to "get herself together again". She really has gotten to the point where she does very little around the house anymore. I think there may be some emotional problems, combined with some physical stuff, going on. She's really not motivated to talk to her doctor about it. She has a bit of a drinking problem, and I'm sure that's related, as well. I apologize for the rambling, but I'm really not sure how to proceed. I'm commited to hanging in there, but I'm concerned about the long term. I would appreciate any advice/input anyone has to offer.