Hi everyone, I apologize in advance for the mini-novel I'm about to post, but I need some help and am not quite sure where to get started. I've been sexually active since I was 16, but did not have intercourse until I was 19 (almost two years ago now - I'll be 21 in February). I've since been with 5 partners, and have not had a satisfying sexual encounter with any of them. Making out and foreplay is fine, but when it comes time to take my pants off....either I lose my erection or am unable to get one, or I get hard but then can't seem to orgasm, get self concious, and then my erection deflates and I want to completely remove myself from the sexual encounter. I'm also typically extremely nervous and tense during these situations. My past bad luck has just made the problem worse, because now I feel like the situation is going to be a disappointment before it even starts. I've never been able to cum with a partner. (Well, I did one time, but I essentially jacked myself off into her mouth and it took a long time and a lot of effort..it was really pretty embarassing.) This includes intercourse, handjobs, oral, etc. I'm uncircumsized, and when I've received a blowjob or a handjob from someone, I often find it uncomfortable to the point of pain, as my head is quite sensitive. I've tried pulling the foreskin back more often, and it's helped somewhat, but not enough. However, if I ask my partner to be more gentle, I find it not stimulating enough. Similarly, sex itself just feels awkward and I often feel like I can't thrust quickly enough to provide enough stimulation for myself. In the past, I dealt with it by giving my girlfriend pleasure instead. (Both before I'd had intercourse before, and now.) I have never, ever received any complaints (and always lots of compliments), so I think it's safe to say I know what I'm doing there. I think overall though this is a bad approach, because it allows me to detach myself from the act and just makes things worse in the long run. On the flip side, I recently realized just how much time I was spending watching/masturbating to internet porn and am trying to stop. (It was at least once a day - more often twice a day). I've been masturbating since I was around 14, and on a essentially daily basis for at least 5 years. So - my hypothesis is, my constant use of porn + masturbation several times a day, coupled with my detachment from sex due to nerves/past failed experiences, is causing my problems. What do you think, and what should I do about it? Do you think I should see a urologist just to be safe? Thanks for all your help.