Please help me with this?

Discussion in 'General Sex Discussion' started by civeta_dei, May 28, 2007.

  1. civeta_dei

    civeta_dei New Member

    Joined:
    Mar 12, 2007
    Messages:
    23
    Likes Received:
    0
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Capital Region, NY
    My girlfriend and I have been exchanging fantasies, ideas, reveries, whatever you would care to call it. And I recently discovered a particularly bold fantasy, and I'm wondering if it's bad. I've heard some theories about women having rape fantasies, but my girlfriend actually has one. She said that she would want to do it almost in a roleplaying situation, I am the dominant spouse and she the submissive, and she would actually want me to physically rape her. Pinning her arms above her head, not allowing her to move, hitting her, the whole nine yards. While I really want to be able to help her live out this fantasy, I'm very nervous about the whole thing. I'm afraid that I won't be able to do it when the time comes, or that maybe I'll do it too over the top in an attempt to please her and it will scare her. Can somebody please help me?

    p.s. My girlfriend and I are in a long distance relationship, and we don't see each other all that often, so I have plenty of time to think about this.
     
  2. Silent22

    Silent22 New Member

    Joined:
    Apr 25, 2007
    Messages:
    142
    Likes Received:
    1
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    NS, Canada
    Personally I dont really see a problem with this, she as already given you her consent. If your scared of hurting her, start off small, put her hands over her head, grab her hair a little bit. Then you can move on to more dominating things once you get the feel of it.

    Me and my girlfriend actually came up with a magic word if you will. It is "banana" and if one of us says that word we know we are going to far or it hurts. Try getting a saftey word with her first so you can be more comfortable and actually know if ur hurting her to much.
     
  3. Joe

    Joe
    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Oct 6, 2005
    Messages:
    1,681
    Likes Received:
    7
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Rocky Mountains
    I second the motion for a safety word or words. That's very important if she wants to yell "stop it", etc. and not really mean it. A little bondage might be appropriate. We use small dog/cat collars and leashes for wrist and ankle restraints; they're fairly comfortable and pretty inexpensive. If she happens to have scarves, they can work nicely too.
     
  4. vampire raver

    vampire raver New Member

    Joined:
    May 24, 2007
    Messages:
    743
    Likes Received:
    9
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    South East
    Safe words are a must make sure you talk through what you are about to do before you begin. Next you should decide on the course of action including the safe word. You can decide what devices you want to use like restraints they sale nice ones just take a look. So then get started but I would start off a little slow. And remeber if you are nervous about it just tell her you are and go from there but remeber she wants it and i don't think you will hurt her if you have a safe word

    Edit by heelfetish: LINK REMOVED; links to other sex-related sites are not permitted!
     
    #4 vampire raver, May 28, 2007
    Last edited by a moderator: May 29, 2007
  5. Pride

    Pride New Member

    Joined:
    Apr 25, 2007
    Messages:
    498
    Likes Received:
    0
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Michigan


    I agree with the other members to have like safe words but a simple "stop" may not work.

    But as far as scarring her imo thats the point....but i dunno
     
  6. Sinda

    Sinda New Member

    Joined:
    May 14, 2007
    Messages:
    24
    Likes Received:
    0
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Auburn, Alabama
    I concur with everyone else. Be sure to have a safety word. Also, start off with the simple things like someone else has already recommended such as pulling the hair and pinning her down. Then once you get into the swing of things you can get rougher with her.
     
  7. suite91

    suite91 Member

    Joined:
    May 14, 2007
    Messages:
    202
    Likes Received:
    9
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Canada
    The flip side to the "stop" safety word is the "go" word. You can agree on a word or phrase that she can use to let you know she is fine without breaking character in your role play. For example "Oh please don't do this!" could be code for "I'm good. Keep Going!"

    Fantasies of control/dominance are pretty common. Lay some ground rules then have fun.