Playing Hard to Get

Discussion in 'Sexual Foreplay and Techniques' started by sballchick, Oct 22, 2006.

  1. sballchick

    sballchick New Member

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    I need some advice.

    How does someone play 'hard to get' without being distant about it? As in, how do you play hard to get seductivly?

    Any suggestions will be appreciated!
     
  2. Thorn

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    I've never played that game but I know some do. I was just wondering why you want to know.
     
  3. Bluesy

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    My take is "Why bother?" If someone's interested, they're interested. If they aren't, then you're better off looking for someone who is. Why all the convoluted muckedy muck head games? The best relationships are founded on honesty and respect--sort of the antithesis of playing with others' minds.
     
  4. Thorn

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    I was thinking the same thing as Bluesy. Also I would think if you played hard to get it may challenge the other person to go after you but when/if they finally succeed in that quest and have you they may loose interest, simply because they were chasing you mainly for the challenge.
     
  5. KatieBear

    KatieBear New Member

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    My philosophy is:

    If they're hard, they can get.
     
  6. sballchick

    sballchick New Member

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    Well, this is why I want to know.

    I've been with this guy for awhile and I don't want him to seem that he can just get it out of me that easily. I want him to know that I want him, yet he has to actually try for it and not just expect me to put out. I hope that makes sence...
     
  7. HerHubby

    HerHubby The SF Poet Laureate
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    I know that this will make me seem rather old fashioned, however, if I was dating in this day and time, I would at least expect to date the lady for a while before thinking about us having sex (and would probably consider that most romantic of all things - exchanging lab reports - before we actually had sex if we did). It totally amazes me to learn that a lot of these young guys go out with a girl and, on the very first date, expect to end up naked between the sheets with the lady and apparently some of them freak out if she is not shaved for them too. If I was a young lady in this day and time, I would probably run a background check on the guy and at least try to get some idea if he was known to have any diseases before even going out with him. In fact, as a male, I'd probably do the same thing with a potenial female date. But, hey, that's just me. These days, if I was dating, I'd rather remain dateless if it meant not getting a disease and not getting involved with some whacko pervert or criminal.
     
  8. Rose

    Rose Resident Sexy Grandma
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    So... why does it have to be a game... "playing"?
    It's okay to let him know you are excited about his advances, and are intrigued with his interest. Just let him know you want to slow down (ummmm... if you really do...).

    If you just think that it's 'supposed' to work that way, but you truly want to have sex with him, you have to decide if you are ready to be yourself, or conform to what is expected of "ladies". :ugh

    You have to be true to yourself. If you are hot for this guy, go for it. If you percieve he is using you, then, are you ready for the consequenses? I mean, a woman IS permitted to enjoy sex simply because she wants it. If you are trying to impress him... with some sort of "purity" identity... it will wear off soon enough, and the real "YOU" will be there.

    My advice? - just do what YOU want to do. Be who you are. If he's a 'user', --oh, well, you will have learned.

    If he is someone who appreciates a woman who knows what she wants, and goes for it... you may have found a real keeper!

    Don't play games, hon. Be yourself...Express yourself...Love yourself.

    Cuz, frankly, Life is too damn short!

    :rose
     
  9. sballchick

    sballchick New Member

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    I think you guys are getting the wrong idea. I've been with this guy for almost a year. And I just want to spice things up a bit. That's all. I want him to want me, not just expect that once we get in the mood he will just automatically get me.
     
  10. Rose

    Rose Resident Sexy Grandma
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    :rofl Well.. you have to admit your first post didn't quit give that impression!

    Okay - so you're more interested in 'role-playing' hard-to-get, (without his knowledge) - kind of making him want it , desire it, crave it --- cuz it's not just laid out on the table anytime, right?

    How about trying a little domination - when he indicates it's "sex-time", you make little demands of him, in order to get some action. These 'demands' could even be sexual in nature, but for YOUR pleasure. Keep a teasing attitude, like catching a fish.... give a little, then yank it back.... give a little, then yank it back...
     
  11. JuicyB

    JuicyB New Member

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    Everyone loves mystery! "Playing Hard to Get" can be an art! But be sincere! And temper the chase with love! Us guys will give up if the chase is too hard! Or quit completely if the girl doesn't play honestly! And a guy who won't work a little for the prize in the initial stage doesn't deserve it! An established relationship is totally different! There sex enters a deeper stage, and serves to add untold dimensions of love and intamacy to a relationship!
     
  12. yorkiesmurf

    yorkiesmurf New Member

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    Playing hard to get is a quick route to rejection. It is a game where the rules are not understood and there is too much opportunity to confuse the message with somehting else. When my wife trys to play hard to get it the approach usually backfires and while dating my attitutde was if they are not interested it is their loss.

    In my honest opinion playing hard to get is a loosing proposition. It is better to be upfront about the attraction and get them to pursue you then it is setting yourself up for rejection.