Opinions on my situation (with a woman)

Discussion in 'The Lounge' started by Fudan, May 28, 2007.

  1. Fudan

    Fudan New Member

    May 14, 2007
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    Here's the situation I'm in.

    I broke up with this girl Kristine uh... almost 2 years ago. Left her because she would annoy me sometimes by getting mad at me for things I thought were stupid... and left her for a girl who DIDN"T do that, who I THOUGHT I liked more.

    So I went out with that next girl, and it was great, but then she screwed me over (cheated and left me RIGHT before I was going to come visit her at her college). I saw one other girl, but only for like a month, it never got very serious, and ended on very good terms.

    I've always kept in touch with Kristine. After I first broke up with her she was crazy about wanting me back... begging pretty much. She realized how dumb she had been and was apologizing like crazy asking for another chance. I was still all pissed and denied.

    So, it's almost 2 years later, and I still think about her prrrretty much every day. Like I said we still talk every once in a while. Since I've been out here in AZ I've been single, and that doesn't help, feeling lonely has made me think about her even more. Wondering "Did I mess up?" "She wasn't really that bad, everyone has arguements..." blah blah blah.

    She's got a boyfriend now (She just finished her first year at college). And yeah, I'm jealous. I tried not to be at first but there's no denying it. I'm jealous. Sometimes when I talk to her, I don't hide the fact that I'm jealous too well... and today she called me on it. She said

    "Raymond, if you've got something to say to me just call me. Stop being a coward about it.... when you get some free time give me a call."

    dun dun duuuunnn.

    Yeah, I have a bunch to say to her. But I don't know if it's right. I mean she's got a man who she's decently happy with, I... am lonely. Is it JUST me being lonely that's doing this? The thing that makes me think it's not just that is I've thought of her every day since we've broken up. Those other girls I went out with? I am completely over. Hardly ever think about them. Kristine? Every damn day. She's in some of my dreams. I smell her some places (some shampoo she always used, when I smell it my ears perk up).

    This is driving me nuts, and I think I have to just call her and spill it all out. If I don't it will always be "what if?"

    So, what do you think?
  2. Nettle

    Nettle Member

    Mar 19, 2007
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    It's amazing how we always think of the good times, once we are no longer with a person.

    You have to think carefully how you felt when you decided to split with her, cos chances are it will be the same if you get back together.
  3. Rose

    Rose Resident Sexy Grandma
    Gold Member

    Feb 8, 2005
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    Dixie Land
    You've got nothing to lose by going ahead and spilling your guts. But, try your hardest to keep it about her... and you. Don't bring the other guy into it, as that may switch the mood, and make her defensive.

    Better to have tried and lost, than to never have tried at all. You'll then be left with two conclusions:
    1. She, too, has been thinking of you alot, and still has feelings.
    - From this point, you can work at building your friendship/relationship.
    2. She has moved on, and it is best for you to do the same.
    - From this point, you can work at making it an amicable parting, with good memories, and hard lessons learned.

    Good luck to you!