once everyother month

Discussion in 'Sex and Relationships' started by ddoubleu, Jul 5, 2007.

  1. ddoubleu

    ddoubleu New Member

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    Been married over 20yrs, and the last few years we only have sex about every other month. Due to schedules, headache, backache, monthly period her drive just isn't there. I've tried DVDs, oils, magazines, toys and playboy TV. All she says is that I'm just "randy" all the time. Which may be true, since I can masturbate only so much. :ugh
     
  2. Barbwire

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    Was that a general rant, or did you have a question?
     
  3. ddoubleu

    ddoubleu New Member

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    more of just a rant than anything else. thanks for being there
     
  4. Rose

    Rose Resident Sexy Grandma
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    ... Lordy be! Tell me about it! It happens... kind of a fact of life.

    We went through that for quite a while. I don't know the answer/reason. I can only speculate that it has something to do with coming to the end of an 'era' of sorts. Kids are grown, or almost. Careers, social gatherings, commitments all of which both of you may be weary of at this point. - Body image may be "suffering" :) - all these things play into a lack of libido.

    The fact that you're on this forum may indicate a light at the end of the tunnel. You both were probably very sexual in your early years. It's still in there - hidden deep under the above mentioned day-to-day humdrum. That CAN be ignited once again.
     
  5. Bluesy

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    Dude, you're approaching it from a male perspective; you have to start thinking like a woman. Do you share the housework? Do little things for her that make her feel special? Do you let her know how loved/beautiful/sexy she is? Purchase a lovely piece(s) of lingerie that appeals to her style and tell her what a fabulous treat it would be to see her beautiful body in it/them, give her a massage, take her out to dinner, surprise her with some grand romantic gesture...appeal to her heart. Sex is psychological for women.

    If your relationship is at all strained, work on it. Learn to communicate, learn to be a good husband. Relationship problems are frequently the source of lack of desire in women. We have to feel loved and appreciated for the wheels of passion to turn smoothly.
     
  6. Rose

    Rose Resident Sexy Grandma
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    ddoubleu, If I were you, I'd take the above post and RUN with it!!
    Bravo, Madame Bluesy!

    Fabulous insight: "Dude, you're approaching it from a male perspective; you have to start thinking like a woman."
     
  7. roksoc

    roksoc New Member

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    I think you need a weekend far off somewhere disconnected from the rest of the world with just you and ur partner and just go at it and not have anythign to worry about or concern you.
     
  8. bighiker2003

    bighiker2003 Banned

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    You have two great replies, I can not add more.

    Hiker
     
  9. liquidshells

    liquidshells New Member

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    Ouch my man... all I can say is ouch.