Not being me

Discussion in 'Sex and Relationships' started by AussieChick, Apr 29, 2007.

  1. AussieChick

    AussieChick New Member

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    I was dating this guy for a year and a half and our relationship turned bad he started getting abusive it got to the point where I wasnt allowed to go out anywhere I had to stay at home with his child while he slept all day and spent all night in chat room's
    Last year in mid december I meet a guy who is friends with my brother we started hanging out behind my mans back one thing lead to another and we ended up sleeping together needless to say I ended things with my man.

    Since Janurary this guy and I have become rather good friends his now living with me and I guess you could say were 'bed buddies' not that I mind I love being close to someone without that 'well ur my gf' crap but now I have become attached to him.

    Normally when Im in bed with a guy (that Im dating ) I feel comfortable enought to touch myself and be open but with this guy I dont seem to be able to do so Im normally also open to new things his brough up the subject of anal a few times but its freaking me out and I wont do it

    Anyone got any advice or suggestions as to why I am now not open ?
     
  2. Kronnie

    Kronnie Banned

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    No offence intended here, but maybe because the two of you are sex buddies , and not in love with each other in that sense , that maybe this is why you are not as open sexualy as you have been in your real relationships.. trust is a factor, feeling secure wit hhim, being able to tell him anything and knowing he will never look down at you for anything you say.

    Just a few ideas , there are others here that are or will be more clued up on this than i am.
     
  3. Unquenchable

    Unquenchable New Member

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    It seems like you found yourself in a situation you are not comfortable with. You said you are attached to him but that you two aren't actually together. That might be bothering you more than you realize and not allowing you to be as open. What I mean is that because your attached but not actually with him it is probably making you feel vulnerable (consciously or not) and that may be making you close down around him.
     
  4. AussieChick

    AussieChick New Member

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    I ended up talking to him about it last night its amazing what opening your mouth can do (lol some may take that the wrong way ) but I explained everything to him and well top my suprise he turned around and said I love u i want to be with you but i wasnt sure how you felt hopefully things will be different now
     
  5. Kronnie

    Kronnie Banned

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    Good luck i sure hope things will be awsome for you both :) best wishes.
     
  6. Brad

    Brad New Member

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    AussieChick

    What a lovely outcome and what a great example of the benefits of talking and being open with each other.

    How often do we conceal issues then wish that we had discussed them with our SO?