New partner has never had an orgasm

Discussion in 'General Sex Discussion' started by aussiebloke, Sep 30, 2007.

  1. aussiebloke

    aussiebloke New Member

    Joined:
    Jul 28, 2007
    Messages:
    93
    Likes Received:
    0
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Brisbane
    Gday all,

    I've been seeing a new girl lately. We haven't had sex yet, but we've fooled around a bit. The thing is, she told me a couple of days ago that she's never had an orgasm in her life, from any kind of stimulation. I can't remember exactly what she said when we talked about it, but it was something akin to not wanting to feel like she's not in control of her body. I read this as a problem with fully relaxing.

    She's not inexperienced sexually. She lost her virginity at 15 and has had steady boyfriend/s since then. We're both 18. So I know I'm aiming to achieve an extremely difficult task here, but from those who have experience in this kind of situation, what do you suggest? Thoughts on the matter?
     
  2. Clark

    Clark Member

    Joined:
    Mar 5, 2006
    Messages:
    189
    Likes Received:
    5
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Houston, TX
    So, she hasn't even brought herself to orgasm?
    Does she masturbate?
    Has she ever tried masturbating? What was that like for her?
     
  3. jgood4u

    jgood4u New Member

    Joined:
    Jul 27, 2007
    Messages:
    161
    Likes Received:
    0
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    California
    Likely, she has some fear factor that would stem from some misunderstanding of what exactly happens with an orgasm, and what might happen more specifically to her. She might fear screaming, or peeing, or blacking out, or something else embarrassing to her or towards her partner like she might find out she doesn't have one at all and you will be disappointed in her. She might have heard some horror story.

    Without any pressure from you, she needs to talk it out, get to the root of the misunderstanding and then be willing to let go of her control and experience the joy of loving.
     
  4. Howie_t

    Howie_t New Member

    Joined:
    Apr 26, 2006
    Messages:
    385
    Likes Received:
    1
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Virginia
    My wife has never has an orgasm until she met me.She told me out of the very few guys whom she has had sex with,she has never had an orgasm with any of them until we started having sex.she tells me that I have been the only one who have made her cum.
     
  5. BobDaBuilder

    BobDaBuilder New Member

    Joined:
    Sep 23, 2007
    Messages:
    5
    Likes Received:
    0
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Pa
    Its possible she is from a religious background also.
    Most churches go by the old addage "Sex is a Filthy, Perverted, Nasty, Disgusting, Vile act"...That you should only share with the ones nearest to you! :D
    Also at only 18 its quite possible she has not had a lover caring enough to work with her to find HER needs first before his own needs.