Never reached orgasm in my entire sexual history (male).

Discussion in 'General Sex Discussion' started by .D., Jul 30, 2007.

  1. .D.

    .D. New Member

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    Hi. :)

    I'll get right down to it. I'm a twenty year old guy who's never reached a climax with any partner, during any sexual act. The only time I've ever ejaculated was during wet dreams, and I've never masterbated - I've really never had the urge to.

    For my entire sexual history, I've had three or four partners, and now I'm in a serious (engaged) relationship. My fiancee drives me wild - I've never been so attracted to anybody - but I still can't reach an orgasm. I have no problem getting an erection, but it eventually just subsides, regardless of how infatuated I am with her, even during oral.

    While I'm on that subject, I really don't feel the rush during a blowjob that other guys seem to describe. I barely notice any feeling at all. I think I honestly prefer going down south on her - it doesn't turn me on, but she really loves it, and that makes me happy.

    But I digress. We've done it all in the shower, upside down, handcuffed to the bed, wearing edible underwear (we're both a little kinky)... it doesn't matter. Still no juice.

    Our relationship couldn't be better, but I get the feeling that my fiancee is a little hard on herself because I can't orgasm, like I'm not attracted to her or something. That couldn't be more distant from the truth.

    So... any advice? :lol:
     
  2. Buffalo204

    Buffalo204 Member

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    I'm being serious now. Go see a psychologist. If you are healthy I think you have some deep seated problem. It may not be a big deal but I doubt a forum such as this will be much help.:)
     
  3. .D.

    .D. New Member

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    Thanks, Buffalo. I really appreciate it.

    Well, my doctor says I'm healthy, so maybe the issue is psychological. However, I'm a little nervous about having any kind of psychological analysis because it might interfere with certain future career plans, though.

    So I'm guessing this doesn't happen to a lot of people, right? :lol
     
  4. Cobia

    Cobia New Member

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    Just get in the mood? I don't know..music, candles. That helps me. :S
     
  5. .D.

    .D. New Member

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    Oh, I'm in the mood. I'm always in the mood. I'm still in the mood when it's all over with.

    I just don't orgasm. X_X
     
  6. Buffalo204

    Buffalo204 Member

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    Hay, been there done that!! One of the best things I ever did for me. Every community has some that work on a sliding scale!:)
     
  7. peta pumkin

    peta pumkin New Member

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    "D" I think I would be seeing a Urological Specalist. Make sure of the physicals before fiddling with the mind.
     
  8. Joe

    Joe
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    I agree with Peta. See a urologist, or maybe an endocrinologist. It sounds to me like something is out of whack.
     
  9. cook74

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    ???

    Ive never heard of this before ( I might be betraying my ignorance here ) but you guys sound like you have a pretty healthy sex life appart from this one obstacle. The doctors are the only ones that can help you, not advice on how you can make your sex life better.
     
  10. Rose

    Rose Resident Sexy Grandma
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    I'm sure the frustration is unbearable. For both of you.

    Tell me , do you orgasm through masturbation?

    After you have this "failure", are you able to go home and pleasure yourself to completion?

    If so, then I would side with the advice of seeking an emotional/mental evaluation.

    If not, then I side with a physiological evaluation.

    Hope this helps.
     
  11. bighiker2003

    bighiker2003 Banned

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    .D. said
    All men masturbate at one time or another in life,
    So their is something drasticall wrong here.
    I would suggest a complete medical checkup
    first and then have your Doctor suggest
    what to do next.

    Hiker
     
  12. .D.

    .D. New Member

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    As I've said, I've never masterbated, and I'd really rather not. I've never experienced an orgasm in any form, ever, but it's really not such a huge obstacle for me - to me, sex is about pleasing my partner, which is a little hard to do by yourself. :)

    But I'm ranting now. I'll get checked out by a urologist and maybe a psychologist.
     
  13. melicious

    melicious The Old Maid
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    Well there are other reasons than just her psychologically feeling like she is a good partner to you if you cannot ejaculate, though I am sure that alone is a huge burden. If the two of you are engaged, this woman is likely considering her future as well. Most women are considering when and if they will become mothers. It seems to me a lifemate who cannot seem to ejaculate is less likely to be the father of children. This could add some stress to the relationship as well.

    I agree with the Urologist, which is a doctor who specializes in the urinary system of both genders. As the urinary system and the reproductive system are so very linked in males, he will certainly be able to diagnose any problems.
     
  14. Brad

    Brad New Member

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    Hi D

    My opinion differs from some of the other postings.

    You have revealed quite a lot about yourself in what you have already said.

    Your doctor as you mentioned has already told you that you are healthy (physically). And you have ejaculated in wet dreams which confirms that your body can orgasm and ejaculate.

    When you said, “I've never masterbated, and I'd really rather not.”

    That spoke VOLUMES to me.

    WHY is it that you prefer NOT to masturbate?

    When you said, “to me, sex is about pleasing my partner”.

    Do you not sometimes think that it should be about MUTUAL pleasure for both of you?

    And that your partner would be even more pleased and satisfied knowing that she gave you the ultimate orgasmic pleasure also?

    Is there some deep burried feeling within you that makes you feel uncomfortable in letting go with your current partner? I have some further thoughts on the possible answers to this question, but I’ll retain them for now.

    When you said, “I'm a little nervous about having any kind of psychological analysis because it might interfere with certain future career plans, though.”

    Are you really worried that it might interfere with your career, or is that a bit of a cop out to avoid getting some counseling help?

    Forgive me if I am on the wrong track. Forgive me if I’m being a bit blunt, it is just honest advice.

    But the picture I see is that you have some deep seated mind issues that need to be addressed for your own benefit and happiness. And for that of your partner also.

    10 out of 10 to you for taking a first step to address your issues here within this forum.
     
  15. jollyolly316

    jollyolly316 New Member

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    I got the same impression as Brad... The no masturbating, and "sex is just about pleasing the other person" suggests it's down to some emotional/mental issues.