need real advice?

Discussion in 'General Sex Discussion' started by sexual_entity, Jul 10, 2007.

  1. sexual_entity

    sexual_entity New Member

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    hey. i've had a previous thread about my addiction to porn, but this is a little different. i made an appointment with a counceller to talk about my issues in life, but right now i'm confused. i'm starting to realize that my love for porn is a supliment to other things in life. for the past week or so, i've been trying to fill my life with other forms of entertainment that will actually help me in life. like drawing, or reading. it seems like everything i try to do is forced, and i don't get much enjoyment out of any of those things. i know none of you are doctors or psychologists, but is there any advice you can give me to get myself out of this hard place, atleast until i can see my doc? i don't like spending this much time watching porn any more, but nothing in life is fulfilling at all. please help! [BANANA]PEANUTBUTTER[/BANANA]
     
  2. smlsml

    smlsml New Member

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    i think you are just in a phase, i mean your only 19 so i wouldnt b too worried about your porn addiction.

    lets face it, there are worse things out there that you could be doing. i'd rather have an addiction to porn than a addiction to alcohol or drug any day.

    dont be worried play away my friend:nerv
     
  3. sexual_entity

    sexual_entity New Member

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    i'm sorry to bring myself to pessimism once more, but apparently, my entire family consists of lazy, unhappy people who do love eachother some what, but almost always think for themselves. i've tried so hard to be a happy individual, but it just doesnb't happen. maybe its genetic? if so, then i'm fucked to a world where a never ending sense of unsatisfaction and unhappiness lie. it's kind of weird though. its easier to open myself up and enjoy what i'm doing, or focus on it if i'm alone. any social contact some how blurrs all my thoughts and i can't focus or enjoy anything. it's like i become entirely numb.

    but i guess this isn't the right forum for this type of thing. i'll have to wait until i see my doc. thanks for your advice sml, grately appreciated.
     
  4. melicious

    melicious The Old Maid
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    How soon is this appointment? I recognize some signs of basic depression. Please consider asking some questions about general depression at your appointment.
     
  5. Rose

    Rose Resident Sexy Grandma
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    I think that whenever someone is in the beginning stages of denying themselves a 'pleasure' to which they are addicted, it IS a forced action. That's normal. It can be compared to deciding to eat proper and exercise regularly. Changing habits by substituting other, healthier habits is an act of the 'will' long before it becomes an act of 'enjoyment'.

    You do, however, slowly begin to find the enjoyment, and the drudgery of your drawing... or reading... will become something to which you look forward. I think you are taking positive steps on your own power until you can see the doc. I see that as inner personal strength. I commend you!
     
  6. sexual_entity

    sexual_entity New Member

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    thank you so much rose! i think what i'm hearing is that you have to work on things before those things become enjoyable? that sounds logical. i really appreciate your advice. lifes weird again, just like when i was like 15. and i think it all comes from family related issues. i realized one day i wanted to be good at life. some how, when me and my fam went to cali to visit my gramps fam (which is so much more kept and kind and loving) and it was easy to have energy to do things, and life wass enjoyable and i wanted to push harder. its weird, because i still want to do those same things, but i guess motivation lies within some place else than yourself, it seems. cause now i'm back here with a loveless family, finding it so hard to move.

    on a seperate note though, i really appreciate your advice. i think i'm gonna try to keep my shit together until i can see my doc.
     
  7. Bluesy

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    Mel and Rose are so wise :bow Beating an addiction is supposed to be excrutiating in the beginning...stopping any habitual behavior is a contest of willpower and dedication. The good news is that it gradually gets easier and easier to deal with, and some people are able to use porn moderately later on, after it loses it "pull". Hang in there, babe. Post or PM if you need a little courage boost :)

    And depression really sucks enjoyment out of activities that would normally capture and hold your attention. Ugh, I really hate that aspect of it (as if there's any aspect of depression that's fun :ugh ). When I'm in a moderate depressive phase, I can't muster up enthusiasm for anything. Things I typically love doing are a chore. With the right med(s)/therapy, that will change. I promise you that will change.
     
  8. Brick

    Brick New Member

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    It might help if you describe the extent of your addiction. How much time do you spend watching porn? How is it affecting your life? How is it affecting your relationships?
     
  9. Bluesy

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    You can read more of his story here, if you're interested: http://www.sexualforums.com/talk/showthread.php?t=11832