My attempt to be able to last longer then 10 seconds, do you think it's a good idea?

Discussion in 'General Sex Discussion' started by Newguy, Apr 14, 2007.

  1. Newguy

    Newguy New Member

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    Ok, well I'm back. I recently posted about this pain in the ass problem of mine about how I can't last longer then a few pumps then I'm done (like 10 - 15 seconds). Many of you had given me advice to do the PC muscle thing, masturbate before having sex, slow down (which is out of the question because it doesn't even last long enough to get up to speed.), etc.... Basically, none of these things work for me. When my GF takes her panties off, I get so fucking horney that I cum instantly after I start to fuck her. It then takes me like 5 - 10 minutes to get hard again. I can last forever when she gives me head, but sex - no way. I've tried masturbating more, but that seems to make it worse.

    I beleive I might know what is the root of my problem - PORN. I love porn, and I think I look at it to much. I actually think I like porn better then sex simply because I can control how long I last when I'm jerkin off. If I could last for as long as I want during sex, I would most likely like sex much more. My girlfriend and I don't have sex very often (maybe once a week, sometimes more but usually once a week tops). I, being 25 years old, am always horny, so since we don't have sex that often, I look at porn a lot. But I think porn is what leads to my 10 second sex problem. I think it does something to me mentally that makes me cum fast when I'm actually having sex. I masturbate a lot too (at least once a day). I think all this masturbating is messing me up.

    So, I figured I'd stop watching porn in an attempt to "cure" me of this PE problem. I haven't looked at porn (or masturbated) for a week. So, I'll see what happens the next time me and my girl have sex. Maybe it will work, maybe not. I'm just sick of being a two-pump-chump. I have been the same way with the same girl for over 5 years now, so I'm really starting to get pissed. I want to be able to fuck my girlfriend and last for at least 5 minutes. She's doesn't really like foreplay either, so that doesn't help any.

    So basically it comes down to the fact that when I go to fuck her I have to be able to control myself mentally, so that I'm not like "holy shit...I'm fucking her.....blow..." So, I'll see what happens. What do you guys think about my idea. If I can't fix this problem myself, then I may go to see a doctor, but I don't want to have to do that. What do you all think about this idea???
     
  2. bighiker2003

    bighiker2003 Banned

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    Dont be supprised if just the opposite happens.
    I recall your origional post but I dont recall wheather you said you
    were only getting sex once a week,
    That being the case I would think the problem is the
    fact that you are 25 years old and only getting it once a week.
    At that age you should be getting it at least twice a day
    if not more.
    Why do you only get it once a week.

    Hiker:sf
     
  3. SexyScorp

    Gold Member

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    Ooooohhh if only in an IDEAL world.....

    TEN times a day.......:)

    haha
     
  4. Newguy

    Newguy New Member

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    I only get it once a week because my girlfriend just doesn't want sex that much like I do. She's not a horny bastard like I am. I would love to get it more, but she just doesn't put out that often (quite possibly because of my 10 second sex problem). It kind of sucks, but she's an awsome girl, and I love her (I've been with her for over 5 years now), but we just don't have much of a sex life. If I get better, then that might change.

    As far as just the opposite happening....If I'm lasting 10 seconds now (no control whatsoever), then the opposite would be complete control. Basically, the problem can't get any worse, so I figure fuck it, I'll try it. It can't hurt. So it's been a week now since I looked at porn and/or beat it, or got laid, but I need to learn how to control myself. That is my theory, learn self-control then I will be able to control my orgasms, hopefully.
     
  5. NaughtyKnickers

    Gold Member

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    General consensus is that abstaining from having an orgasm just makes the next one quicker and more tense, harder to control. You're going to have yourself wound tight!!! :eek
    It's admirable that you wish to gain control over this, but having less orgasms could very well make your problem worse.
    Good luck either way, I wish all the best to you, hang in there, and keep us posted. :)
     
  6. MikeDog

    MikeDog New Member

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    NewGuy, a couple of questions. Are you just as quick on the 2nd round has the first? Are you using a condom or bareback? Have you tried those numbing condoms they sell?
     
  7. Newguy

    Newguy New Member

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    No, I can last much longer on the second round. The problem is that she doesn't like to do it again (she doesn't feel like waiting the 5-10 minutes for me to get hard again). I would just go down on her in between rounds, but she doesn't want me to ever go down on her, unless she just got out of the shower. She's very self concious about her pussy. And, no we don't use condoms. We haven't in many years, and that isn't really an option. I don't mind wearing them, but she absolutely hates condoms. So I cant really use condoms to help me. Basically, it's usually just 1 shot - do good on the first round or feel like shit for a whole week until I get to try again.
     
  8. Dreama

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    Sounds like a shitty setup.
     
  9. bergomi

    bergomi New Member

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    I have practically the same exact identical problem, and everything is almost as you described it, even the circumstances are very similar. :eek

    I'm searching for a solution myself too...
     
  10. bighiker2003

    bighiker2003 Banned

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    The solution is obvious.
    Give Her a choice, Loosen up or hit the road.

    Honestly its not very often that I would say something like that
    but every minute you put up with that crap is one minute of
    your life that is wasted.

    Hiker:sf
     
  11. Newguy

    Newguy New Member

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    Nah, she's awsome, really. She's just not a very sexual person, I don't know why. But that is not the point. I still think I would like to be able to last for much longer during round 1, without having to beat off or something first in order to make me last longer. I dunno, having sex once a week does kind of suck, but it's not the end of the world.
     
  12. MikeDog

    MikeDog New Member

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    Knocking out condoms hurts because that latex barrier should help you. You said you tried the masturbation before sex and that's only other thing I can think of. In theory it should work like a round 2 for you, round 1 for her. Sorry I'm out of ideas :shrug
     
  13. bighiker2003

    bighiker2003 Banned

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    New Guy
    You can disreguard my last post.

    If you used a condom to catch your sperm, Would She be more receptive
    of you going down on Her while you are taking tht 15 minutes to build it back
    up.
    I love tasting a Woman's cum, And they all do to some degree. Tell her
    that you would love to taste Her, (INSIST) If She would ever relent just
    once I think She might like the idea of being DIRTY just once.

    Hiker:sf
     
  14. SDAVIS

    SDAVIS New Member

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    I am in the same situation. As much as I try to control it, I can't. I went to Dr. and got teh drug Paxil and that REALLY helped along with more frequency. I could go and go, but as the frequency has reduced(not my choice), the time has shortened. I'm like you, I get that 'I'm fucking her!, I love that pussy!, she's getting excited and making noise!, damn it feels good!, blow.....she's now hacked off. As far as porn and JO, I was the master of JO with porn and I think where it hurts endurance is if you don;t hold it and strtech out the time you JO. In other words, don;t JO and cum too fast. If you do, you will trin your muscles for no control and you will for sure cum quick during sex. Now back to the present: I cannot seem to make any of these approaches for stretching out the time work. No matter how hard I try to hold it, it gets away from me. No matter what else I think of during sex, I can;t stall it. Question for other guys who can last and last - do you tighten your penis pucles during thrusting sex or do you relax them and does this make any difference? Also, does it matter how long the time after you get hard but before penetration is? I'm thinking that if we drag it out some, the initial excitment might subside and I could make it last longer. Any ideas?
     
  15. Ryan

    Ryan Gold Member

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  16. MikeDog

    MikeDog New Member

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    It's probably years off but I heard a while ago the drug companies think there is a big market for a PE drug if they can get one to market. I guess they are searching for the next Viagra.
     
  17. tr0n

    tr0n New Member

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    Don't worry dude, I have the same problem. Not masturbating and not watching porn doesn't help. In fact, I think last time it made me worse off. The only bonus was I filled her up with a HUGE amount of cum, which she totally liked and that got her even more horny! The only difference is, once I cum I'm 'sensitive' for about a minute, but I don't get soft, and can then last forever without cumming again- I think only once did I cum twice, and that was after like 45 minutes of straight fucking. However, if I cum, then stop for a few minutes, then go again..I'll blow in a few minutes. It's strange and I've almost given up trying to improve it, as it's totally unpredictable.
     
  18. geestonboy11

    geestonboy11 New Member

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    Man I'm in the same situation as you, I love nothing more than sex, and pussy, and making a woman feel good, but I just can't last, I came 5 times last time during sex, 5, and only on the 5th did it last more than 30 seconds, its terrible, I've searched forever to find a cure, never found anything, only thing I can say that has helped me was drugs, if your into em, snort a gram of so of blow, fuck her on the cum ;-) down, hehe. Same with ex, or get baked and take your mind off everthing, and you'll last, that's why I think PE is all in your head.

    Good luck my friend
     
  19. Nettle

    Nettle Member

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  20. tezemery

    tezemery New Member

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    I think you need to relax, its not a big deal that you cum quickly or you can last a long time getting worked up about it will just increase the problem, if you imagine when you fantasise that your going have sex with your gf then your going to pull out and cum on her face, dont even think about squirting inside her, also try to replicate what you do when you jerk off is there a certain way you sit or think to relax?

    Cuming quickly is all in your head, i used to cum very quickly when i jerked off when i was younger but i found a few techniques to help me out and its almost like working out your cock trying to hold your orgasm for longer and longer it takes time and practice, like i focus on keeping my bum relaxed while i have sex then when i tense up my bum i can cum.

    Most of all dont worry!and dont get worked up about it, its completly natural for men to cum quickly and i bet 90% of the reason is because your getting worried about it.

    try some of the stuff i said, good luck:)