[Ask a Guy] Most awkward boner?

Discussion in 'Ask a Guy/Girl' started by wanderingwife, May 26, 2016.

  1. wanderingwife

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    last night my husband told me about the time in junior high school he got a boner in the locker room. He was walking past the girls locker room and he saw one of the "popular" girls standing near the doorway totally naked. She was talking to a clothed friend of hers that met her at the entrance. Naked girl thought she could quickly meet her friend and go back but my husband said he got a good look. He thought he was fine to shower but the imagine popped (pun intended) back into his mind and he got hard in the shower! He said he was teased for awhile after. Guys, any embarrassing boners out there?
     
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  2. iswhatitis

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    Teen years, cousin's friend kept sneaking up on me and wrapping her legs around me in the pool. Needless to say an underwater tent appeared. And the look of shock on her face, the next time she did it and encountered something big and hard, was quite amusing
     
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  3. danrb007

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    I don't remember any personal embarrassing boners. I do remember in high school english class we were all doing speeches and this one guy before he had to get up and give his speech the girl next to him whispered some things in his ear and he got a boner in his pants and tried to get out of being next but the teacher would let him....
     
  4. HazHardHat

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    oh man, quite a few!

    I was looking at porn when home alone and there was a frantic knock on the door. One of our friends left her phone here earlier in the day and had come all the way back for it. I ran down without thinking too much because it sounded like a very important/official knock. About 10 seconds after I let her in I realized I was still pretty much hard lol I think she knew and saw but to this day I am not positive. The hard on didn't fully go down for about a minute or so!

    I was horny as hell at work, had a big hard on that I was hiding by sitting close to my desk. I get a phone call from my boss to come over to the office right away as we had to discuss something very time sensitive. At the time there was a very beautiful young lady who sat opposite of me at a desk. I had to try my hardest (pardon the pun) to make my rigid boner go down quickly so I could stand up and go see my boss LOL My boss ended up having to do a follow up call to make sure I was on my way ;-)

    those are just a few, I have quite a few more.....:p
     
    #4 HazHardHat, May 30, 2016
    Last edited: May 30, 2016
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  5. Sagittarius84

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    So gf's brother and his wife have lived with us for past 6months or so. She's nice, but dumb as a box of rocks, with personality/sensibilities of a girl 10 yrs younger(she's 26). I used to have no qualms about boners in my house, hell I pay for it, so why should I? I simply had to make them not so obvious around our almost 9 yr old daughter. So after the brother and wife moved in, i made sure to do a quick visual check and subside any visible boners before being in their presence. Apparently my checks weren't sufficient because once while wearing sweatpants, my gf laughingly took me aside and said "eggplant alert". I thought it was weird because i wasn't hard, but upon closer inspection my flaccid or half chubbed penis outline is clearly visible when im wearing sweatpants. Being that we're all fairly sexually liberal, discussions have led me to believe my (admittedly larger than average) penis in a warm flaccid state is bigger than the brother's fully aroused..so now as hilarious as my gf finds the entire situation, i basically refuse to wear sweatpants again.
     
  6. blackjack55

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    I got one So teen years i had a bit of a hard time fitting in and controlling my hormones at the time. One moment stands out in my gym class we had a free day were we could play basketball or walk around but we had to be in our gym clothing. Well I was sitting and trying to chat with this popular hot girl (and failing i might add) when i noticed her shirt was see through and she was bra less, well my mind connected the dots and all the sudden i was pitching a big tent in those flimsy shorts, well her and her friends saw it and had a nice big laugh about it, it was forgotten pretty fast and no one bugged me about it besides my friends who liked to bust my balls about it on a frequent basis
     
  7. sayss18

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    Last year when I went swimming I went to the pool and there was a sexy lifeguard on duty and I got an erection. I was wearing tiny speedos, so I had to go back in the changing room before my hard on popped out of them. I stood in the showers for a minute or so waiting for it to subside.

    Recently, when in the showers after swimming, I got a strong, throbbing erection. It took ages to go down, I stood facing the wall hoping no one would see it. This often happens, and the showers are open so there is no privacy. I just stand close to the wall so no one sees it and wait for it to go down. It's embarrassing but I think if I'm not drawing attention to it no one should be looking and there's not much I can do about it.
     
  8. NedF

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    In Senior High I had a math teacher that was very hot (she was probably in her early twenties at the time). On more than one occasion I got very hard in her class just by looking at her ass as she wrote on the chalk board. I can remember one time it was still rock hard when the bell rang. I had to strategically position my books as I walked out of the class and down the hall until it went flaccid again.
     
  9. 12barblues

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    I've never been embarrassed about my boner... Lol... Well, unless it doesn't show up to a party....:D
     
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  10. lbushwalker

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    Same experience with same kind of math teacher who wore a short bright red dress.
    She was tiny in stature with firm high breasts and the boys delighted in placing the chalk eraser high above the blackboard such that when she reached for it we all got a glorious view of her gorgeous arse under tiny tight white nickers.
    I did not learn much about maths that year but a lot about my preferences in women ;)
     
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  11. Juniper

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    I remember those early teenage years. Guys have so many hormones going through their systems that the d@mn things might as well be spring loaded. We had co-ed gym classes and somebody would pop one at least once a week while just doing jumping jacks. This one poor guy was wearing his new biking shorts; tent city.....LOL
     
  12. suckmydick72

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    Oh, definitely the boner I had at a colleague's funeral. It was summer and the widow was wearing a very sexy, but tasteful short black dress. Of course she noticed my raging erection and it made her laugh almost uncontrollably in the middle of the ceremony.
     
  13. clubber_stevens

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    lol this sounds strangely familiar to something that happened to me but on a less severe scale although still awkward but I hate it when you are a horny teen and something just sets you off...

    I was in English class when I was 14 and the teacher was calling us up one by one throughout the lesson to come to her desk so she could check our work. My desk was right in front of the teachers. One of the cute girls I used to sometimes oogle was standing near her desk already getting her work checked, she was wearing a cute shortish skirt and was known for being a little promiscious. I heard her muttering to herself in an irritated low tone; "these f**king panties..." and I saw her bend over slightly so she could adjust them from her pretty asscrack and being a hormonal fuelled teen, I probably got the fastest erection known to mankind! I don't think it was deliberate from her to tease anyone as I don't think she thought anyone was watching and the rest of the class was distracted with talk/work but I pretended I did not see under her skirt and she did not notice that i'd noticed. So she went back to her desk after the teacher was done with her then I felt a chill inside me as she called me up next. The problem was I still had a RAGING boner under my desk which nobody had noticed yet but now I risked everyone seeing if I went upto the teachers desk in front of the class. I tried to at least buy myself some time by telling her; "can I just finish this bit?" or "please let me finish off a part first" but she was adamant to see my work. I did the best thing I could do which was move at a brisk pace upto her desk and before I stood up I tried my best to 'angle' my equipment downwards so it would be less obvious. I walked quickly and handed her my work with my back to the class and she noticed the angle'd downwards' bulge. Luckily she acted like she did not notice as I stood there and she went over my work and luckily nobody in the class noticed due to the fact I was standing at an angle where most of the kids would not be able to see a bulge as well as the class generally being busy and distracted anyway.

    Felt shitty still as the teacher was a woman in her early to mid 50's and was about as sexually appealing as a punch in the face and I wonder if she thought I was hot for her or something lmao. but I am glad nobody noticed or my school life would had truely been hell but it sucked still.
     
  14. WTbeach

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    My step mom used to come in my bedroom and drop off the laundry, I was 16 and she would turn so she could see me, I was always lying on top of the covers in nothing more than a skimpy white pair of silk bikinis she she was gawking and I had a boner that went to the left, she was always wanting to see that thing and later on I made sure that I was on the edge of the bed jacking off so she could stand in the hall way and watch from the dark halls... i guess she enjoyed watching her hot 16 year old stepson jacking his hard dick.... I enjoyed it!!!
     
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  15. Alexia29

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    wtf.....
     
  16. socovapz

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    I get them everytime I fall asleep in a vehicle and wake up in the vehicle idk why most embarrassing time it happened was going with my gf and her mom to their families. I had just woken up and we stopped to get gas when her mom asked me to pump gas....yup I had a huge rock hard boner and only gym shorts on so I couldn't hide it lol so I had to be rude and tell her I couldn't pump the gas
     
  17. JackieTreehorn

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    Like above, sometimes riding in a car. I don't know what causes it but it can be uncomfortable.