Meeting guy for nsa sex - need advice

Discussion in 'Sexual Foreplay and Techniques' started by bonochik, Mar 20, 2007.

  1. bonochik

    bonochik New Member

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    Okay, this is very foreign for me, but I'm meeting someone for casual sex (I still can't believe I'm even saying this) and I'm pretty vanilla--never done anal, very few positions (missionary, on top/doggy a few times; 69 once long, long ago and maybe a few others Looong forgotten)

    I don't want to come across as this naive, inexperienced young girl but a mature, sexually confident woman who knows what she likes. But there's the rub--in the past 10 years, oral sex happened in the very beginning, maybe once in the middle then nowhere in the end; missionary was the only position to get me off and I feel like I'm a virgin again!

    How do I shed some of my inhibitions to "go with the flow" and be more assertive? Also, any explanations of good positions would help! :shrug
     
  2. NyguY

    NyguY New Member

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    wow babe im sorry to hear your sex life had been so bland any questions or anything i could to do help just ask
     
  3. freaky2

    freaky2 New Member

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    Just relax and go with the flow. Follow his lead. Before you know it, you'll be confident.
    Ask him what he likes~communicate. It goes a long way!
    Good luck!
     
  4. MikeDog

    MikeDog New Member

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    I agree relax and don`t worry too much about positions the basics are always in style. Don`t be afraid to be confident and ask for what you want or even show him. For example if you want oral gently push his head down to your pussy while he`s kissing your chest. Enjoy yourself and just let go and don`t be afraid to make a little noise :)
     
  5. bighiker2003

    bighiker2003 Banned

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    Bonochick
    I'm not here to bust your bubble, So listen to what I have to say
    then trash it if you will.
    You cannot pretend, It will catch up with you. With negative results.
    All Men do not want a Woman about town that knows all about sex
    How I would love would to be in bed with a Woman and put my lips against hers
    and say what i want, And look in Her eyes for the answer,
    yes I know that sounds corny to a lot of people but it is the way I and the majority of Men think. I don't want you to lead, That is a Mans job. And if they can't
    they are not Men.
    Be only a Woman, Don't pretend to be what you are not.
    And it will be appreciated.

    Hiker

    getting off my podium now.
     
  6. Kronnie

    Kronnie Banned

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    "yes I know that sounds corny to a lot of people but it is the way I and the majority of Men think. I don't want you to lead, That is a Mans job. And if they can't
    they are not Men."

    Where did you get that from lol.
    Im a man, check my pictures if your still unsure, wheres this old text book that says a man is not a man unless he leads ?

    Maybe im just not some archaic caveman with a club in my hand
    Maybe i see women as equals rather than beneath the powerful male subject.
    Variety is as they say the spice of life.....Mix it up, there is no one set role in life, we all have male and female parts to our selves, wehter you want to belive it or not.
    Unless of course you only had 2 fathers and no mother.
     
  7. Dreama

    Gold Member

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    Can someone say sexism??:uhh: Men do not have to lead to be men, and women can lead just as easily without degrading a man's masculenity. It's only if you aren't secure in your masculinity that you feel that you aren't a man, if you don't always lead in the bedroom.
     
  8. cbrmale

    Gold Member

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    Not this man, thank you very much. There is nothing hotter than a confident and experienced lady who throws me down and has her way with me! I am certainly not into compartmentalising women as sluts and whores, and if a woman has the experience to be confident with me, then so much the better. Ah, I can think of a couple of women who really had their way with me, and me with them too!

    Back to the point for Bonochik. Most men like an assertive lover for a casual encounter, there is less second-guessing and ambiguity involved. Casual sex is very different to relationship sex, you need to be able to 'read' each other on your first (and possibly last) encounter. If you don't lead your partner, and he doesn't lead you, it gets nowhere. This is why you ask, am I right?

    Get your head around what you want you partner to do with you before you get together, and then communicate it in a way that is appropriate to the moment. Missionary position is probably too bland for casual sex, you on top or doggy usually satisifes most men, we aren't looking for the Karma Sutra each and every time.

    Don't stress, stay calm, and have a think now about what you want and how you would like the encounter to travel.
     
  9. Joe

    Joe
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    Just be yourself and do whatever feels right at the time. Throw away your inhibitions if you can. Have fun. That's the point, isn't it?
     
  10. SexyScorp

    Gold Member

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    HAHAHAHA to Big Hiker's words...

    Was that a wind up man....???

    Really.....what century are you living in?

    That is the sort of thing my 80 year old Da would say!

    lol

    The irony is its only the strongest of men that can allow themselves to be led.
     
    #10 SexyScorp, Mar 24, 2007
    Last edited: Mar 24, 2007
  11. cbrmale

    Gold Member

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    This is very true. It's easy to see yourself as macho man knowing all, it is more vulnerable to put yourself into the hands of a partner who really knows more than you.
     
  12. SexyScorp

    Gold Member

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    Yes cbrmale

    Macho men (who i have an intense dislike for), are usually the weakest of the male species....and often very threatened by strong feisty women.....

    I wouldnt even entertain one as a friend tbh....its too tiresome..

    You obviously dont fit into that bracket....

    I must have driven my mother and father mad earlier on in life. He acted out the macho role and she the submissive "liking to please" little woman....uugghhh....I could see straight through them...they were co dependant, and since she passed on, my Dad has fallen apart :( God bless him....

    But it was such a great lesson for me watching them.......they were two of my greatest teachers...

    :)

    I love them both..
     
  13. Funseeker

    Funseeker New Member

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    This is a huge generalization. From the intelligence level of your posts, I don't think you would be so willing to accept such blanket statements from others.
     
  14. SexyScorp

    Gold Member

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    Hmmmm....

    Not a blanket statemenet as such.....more of an observation based on the author's experiences.....

    Maybe she should have preceded the quote with

    'IN MY EXPERIENCE"......maybe that would bring more clarity?

    That is HER truth, even if not others....:)
     
  15. Kronnie

    Kronnie Banned

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    I dont like a more powerful woman , because she knows more than me , its just simply i like a woman in control of me.
    I am certainly not submissive to males, just to females.

    All this im a real man me , im so tough.....just makes me laugh, i have lived with a brother who was very like this, and i know some females enjoy a man to be a man ( as in in charge taking control of pretty much every aspect of you )
    But i say screw that, be yourself , enjoy being a woman, enjoy the power you possess just from being female, as it is the female that gets to choose who she will be with, and us males that have to impress and work to get the lady of our dreams ( in my view anyway )
     
  16. Debs@ Ssh Escor

    Debs@ Ssh Escor New Member

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    Some very good replies.

    Now for my 2pence worth

    Be yourself, enjoy, relax and do anything you fancy.
    Watch a few home adult video's on your own first to give you an idea of things... (warning... make them soft porn 1st... lol) or you may scare the living day lights out of him.

    And always remember,
    YOU ARE ONLY AS GOOD AS WHO YOU ARE WITH>
    BE THE BEST ;)

    Have fun
    Debs xx
     
  17. SexyScorp

    Gold Member

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    "YOU ARE ONLY AS GOOD AS WHO YOU ARE WITH"

    Hmmmm.....not surea about that lass tbh!!!

    I would rather like to think we are only as good
    as ourselves...

    lol!!
     
  18. JuicyB

    JuicyB New Member

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    Crossing some barrier in your sex life can make your heart race, and can add zest and excitment! Just be sure it's reasonably safe, both physically and emotionally.