Male with orgasm trouble. Any suggestions?

Discussion in 'General Sex Discussion' started by jlutnik, Dec 1, 2010.

  1. jlutnik

    jlutnik New Member

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    I'm a 32 year old male. I haven't had much sexual experience. I've slept with 6 or 7 woman and really don't have an hugely active sex life.

    In any case, my problem is when I have sexual intercourse with a condom, I cannot orgasm. I could have intercourse for an hour and not orgasm.

    When I masturbate I can get done in 10-15 mins.

    This is kinda embarassing as you can imagine.

    I think the problem may be the way I masturbate. I don't stroke/thrust my penis in my closed fist. Never liked that. I rub my penis left-to-right against myself with my hand. If I masturbate by holding my penis in my first and rubbing, I won't orgasm either.

    When I use sex toys, such as pocket pussies that are very well lubed, without a condom, and can orgasm but it still takes a lot of lube and a lot of time (30 minutes at least).

    Any advise? Sometimes I give up on intercourse and just masturbate the rest of the way.
     
  2. johndeeregirl

    johndeeregirl New Member

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    many guys have problem having an orgasm when wearing a condom

    bottom line is.. everyone's different and while you hear about girls having problems, most guys won't admit it.. more foreplay? get yourself close to cumming and then backing off and teasing yourself?

    and welcome to :sf :D
     
  3. Alwayslearningsex

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    Just an idea, try having your partner move her hips side to side to simulate how you masturbate for a while. have her fondle your balls and caress your shaft during intercourse.
    I had a bit of trouble twice before and getting touched that way brought it hard and ready.
     
  4. igor

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    I never heard of that method. If that's the only way you can get off it's no wonder you have trouble with other methods of stimulation.
     
  5. daver

    daver New Member

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    There's a name for the problem of a man having difficulty achieving orgasm: retarded ejaculation. I have it myself, even without the condom. I've had times when I've gone for up to 90 minutes without ejaculating. (Often I never do, and just quit out of exhaustion... or out of concern that I'm exhausting her.) Obviously, sometimes girls love it that I can go for so long, but sometimes I suppose it causes a bit of uneasiness on their part, feeling that they've "failed" in some way. That's my biggest concern about this, more so than needing to get my own rocks off. (I can always do that later by masturbating.)

    Let's see, you mentioned that you have a problem when having sex with a condom, but no problem when masturbating. You didn't mention whether it's ever a problem if and when you have sex without a condom. (Or maybe you never take that chance.) I'm not really sure having the difficulty when wearing the condom would be considered "retarded ejaculation" - after all, condoms really can be desensitizing and uncomfortable, hence it may be a very common problem.

    In any case, there are some discussions and forums on the internet regarding retarded ejaculation. You might want to google the term. It may not help, but at least you may find some sympathetic souls.