I know this topic will have been discussed before, but everybody's situation is different and personal, so I've started my thread. I've been in a relationship over a year with a great guy. For the first 6 months or so we had plenty of sex, and it was the most fun and adventurous sex I've ever had, as my boyfriend took the time and effort to work out what I really like rather than just ask and then give up, and we have similar interests. However, for the last 6 months I've really lost my sex drive, and just haven't felt horny. We still have sex, but only every 2 or 3 weeks, and I enjoy it, but don't feel horny before or after. Sometimes my boyfriend will try to initiate sex, but I won't feel in the mood and feel really uncomfortable with the thought of sex, almost like I want to hide my bits away and keep them to myself. We are still really affectionate and cuddle up in bed, but don't turn that into sexual antics as much as we used to. This is really bothering my boyfriend, and I can see he's hurt by it, so I want to sort it out. I know everybody will have peaks and troughs with their sex drive, but I've always been quite into sex so losing my libido is quite unusual and I don't know what to do about it. So I have a few questions: How important is it to find the cause, or do we just have to try and find a solution? (I had a few personal problems last year which may have been the cause). Personally, I like to understand why a problem is happening before I try to fix it, otherwise you're always fixing the symptoms and not the actual problem. I have a feeling that just 'trying new things' as I expect some people may suggest, won't be enough. How *do* we go about pinning down the cause? What solutions are there? Any other advice from people that have been here? Thanks.