Longing for it to Last Longer

Discussion in 'General Sex Discussion' started by Barbwire, Mar 29, 2010.

  1. Barbwire

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    I find myself longing for something that I can't have and I just need a place to come and vent about it, so here goes...

    My husband suffers from PE & ED. Even with both of those conditions, my husband and I have a pretty satisfying sex life together but, the one thing that I find myself really missing is having penis in vagina (PIV) intercourse for more than 3 minutes.

    We've done our best to work around the PE. More often than not, we incorporate toys during our sessions, usually a dildo and/or vibe. There are times when either my husband or myself uses a dildo on me for up to 45 minutes at a time. I really enjoy the feeling of being pumped, especially after I have an orgasm and sometimes I am able to orgasm again just from the thrusting.

    I have never been able to have an orgasm from my husband thrusting into me because I don't have time to before he ejaculates. Sometimes I masturbate almost to the point of coming then have him penetrate, but it breaks my groove so to speak and I can't orgasm once he's in.

    Judging by what a dildo can do for me I really think that my husband's cock could do the same, should it be able too. It is frustrating for both of us and a long time ago hubby talked about getting strapon penis extender type of thing but I'm not after the feel of manmade materials. What I crave is living, throbbing, hot cock.

     
  2. igor

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    I am always envious when I watch porn and see how long some of these guys can last (if it's really real). I do read some complaints that guys have that they last too long and I always think I'd love to have that problem, since I am also a fairly quick shooter.

    I feel for ya CL. But at least you are both comfortable with using toys, where some couples are not. I would imagine you have tried this but what if you got yourself close to orgasm and continued to stimulate your clit with a vibe while he enters you and thrusts.
     
  3. Barbwire

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    I should have been clearer, what I want is to be fucked longer, not to come quicker. The faster I come the less intense it is. I want a good long fucking to build up to a proper orgasm.
     
  4. north

    north New Member

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    Can't really claim much experience when it comes to most things posted here on the forums, but this is one of the few things I might be able to help with, as my first bf was an older man.

    We initially tried a rubber cock ring and I wouldn't recommend them because he found it uncomfortable and I wasn't too impressed with the results, or lack thereof. But we did continue to experiment and had success with tying other.. um... 'household items' around the base of his cock, such as a necktie or a silk scarf. I've since played around with this method with younger guys to prolongue erection for very long periods of time and it worked.

    I'd suggest you start out by adding it to your foreplay. Try out different items, from rigid to elastic.. anything you find lying around. Tie it securely around the base of his penis and see if you notice a difference while you're pleasuring him orally and manually.

    The important thing is that the object retricting the escape of blood from the penis can be adjusted (tightened/loosened), is relatively soft/comfortable and fairly broad (I'd suggest about two fingers' width).

    Hope this helps. Good luck to you!
     
  5. xChubbyDollx

    xChubbyDollx New Member

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    North had some good advice, I agree, you should try that. Also what you could try are.... condoms. Of course it won't feel the same for you with a condom either (well, it doesn't for me anyway) but maybe a condom would help your man last longer?

    Don't be. They use anesthetic gels, such as lidocaine. The thing with porn is you need to keep in mind they are called ACTORS for a reason. :eyes
     
  6. HardRocker

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    True. I have even seen a video or two where they forgot to remove a clock in the background, and the time would jump ahead in the middle of extended sex scenes. They had to take a break.

    In response to the question, I like the idea of the silk like North suggested. I may try that since it sounds like it combines fun with functionality. Also back in my party days, when I had an alcohol buzz, I remember lasting a lot longer. I know too much alcohol can have the opposite effect, but maybe buzz him up a little more than usual and see if it helps him last any longer. I have also had success with a half (or less) of a 5mg valium. Xanax would substitute. Of course I hate to recommend drugs and alcohol to anyone, but it's certanly worked for me.:lol

    Another thing I've found is that when I take Viagra, it works Much better if I take it at least 3 hours before I need it. I usually take a pepcid with it to settle my stomach, because the first couple of hours on Viagra make my stomach kind of upset, and I feel generally a bit "off" too. It makes it worse since you have to take it on a completely empty stomach, or it will be wasted. It binds with any food and never makes it to the blood stream. After 2 hours, it's absorbed and I can eat something light which both settles the gut plus gives me extra staying power.

    Even though I get an instant boner 45 minutes after it starts to take effect, it isn't as strong as the wood I get a few hours later. I find it's good for about 6 hours. I get the 100 mg pills and cut them in half. !00 is too much and the resulting wood is no better, plus it makes me feel terrible.

    I hope that helps.
     
    #6 HardRocker, Mar 30, 2010
    Last edited: Mar 30, 2010
  7. oldergentleman

    oldergentleman New Member

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    You might try masturbating him first, then see how long he can go after he is able to get another erection. I know for me it has prolonged the fucking by a mile! Have fun experimenting!
     
  8. Barbwire

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    We've tried booze, meds, blowjobs, cock rings and condoms. Nothing has made him last more than 3 minutes. usally it's closer to 2. :ugh If he is able to come and achieve another boner, he can last a bit longer, but 5 minutes is the max and it's very rare he can get 2 boners in one session.
     
  9. xChubbyDollx

    xChubbyDollx New Member

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    You could try the Masters-Johnson technique, you can find some info here:

    Premature ejaculation

    But like it says on that page, this is something that should be shown to you in person by an expert... Apparently doing it wrong defeats the purpose of the whole thing. I don't have any experience with this so I can't help you more, sorry... But it seems to me you've tried everything else so you might want to look into this! :)
     
  10. Barbwire

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    Thanks, Doll. :)
     
  11. xChubbyDollx

    xChubbyDollx New Member

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    You're welcome... I really hope you can get this thing sorted. I know the technique requires a LOT of determination and you probably have to give it a few months, but the results can be incredible (so I hear)
     
  12. Fliteskates

    Fliteskates Member

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    If he can get hard, then I am 99% sure his problem is all upstairs.

    A couple of weeks ago my wife called me a 2 minute man after I came really fast and started laughing, I did to because I'm usually not. Sometimes you can't help it, but almost any guy I believe can control when he cums most of the time, if he practices enough.

    When I was first with my wife, I would have sex with her for like 45 mins straight. She would cum 3-4 times and I kept holding off, thinking I was making the sex better for her. Then she told me I was making her too sore, and I had to cum faster. So I started to cum in 10-15 mins

    I can basically cum for a quickie session in 3-4 mins, or last as long as I need to, not because I'm special or have some gift, but because of practice and strong PC muscles. I have been strengthening them for years, and it simply works.

    Have your husband try some of these exercises and see if it doesn't help him improve his staying power after a month or so:

    Kegel Exercises For Men - AskMen.com

    You can also practice giving him handjobs and when he is about to cum, stop, give him about 20-30s of no stimulation, then start rubbing him down again. Keep doing this over and over, see if you can't get him to back off his orgasm 10 or more times in a session.

    My wife said she can tell when I'm about to blow by the way my dick feels and my body language, breathing etc.

    He won't tell you when he is about to blow because most guys want to give into that feeling and let 'er blow, so trust me, it is probably something you will have to discover yourself.
     
    #12 Fliteskates, Mar 30, 2010
    Last edited: Mar 30, 2010
  13. HardRocker

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    One thing I've noticed about myself whenever I have suffered from ED; I have to continually strain to keep an erection during sex and that continual straining causes me to cum too fast. Just like if, for some silly reason, a guy wants to beat off in a hurry, he'll strain in a similar way to speed up the process, and it works. Unfortunately it's the same straining that's necessary to keep an erection during sex if you have ED.

    I know that's no help for you, CL, but just one of my observations.
     
  14. Stormin10

    Stormin10 Member

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    Get him to breath deeply and control it...
    Without bragging i can last as long as my GF wants me to now, she calls the shots and lets me know when she's had enough and cum enough and we both finish together..
    In the beginning i found it hard to control myself because of nerves however now? as long as i want, and i can go at it pretty purposefully, the secret for me was learning to focus on her and not my dick and get my breathing rhythm under control, take deep breaths when you feel yourself getting closer.... Try it.
    Oh.. and 1 other thing, both of us are above average fit and healthy which helps heaps too...
     
    #14 Stormin10, Mar 30, 2010
    Last edited: Mar 30, 2010
  15. LPjammin

    LPjammin New Member

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    I think we may have discussed this before?

    Ideally, he holds off for two weeks and will be good and pent up. From there, however y'all get to the gettin' on with it, he simply needs to make himself stop before he starts cumming, wait a bit, get back to it and so on and so forth. Count strokes, or feel, or whatever.

    Every step of the way, your pot, so to speak, is getting closer to boil and every time he slides it back in, mmmmmmm...

    It ain't easy but, even with ED, unless it's severe, if he's saved it up, he, you two, can do it.

    After awhile, when you are on the edge, he can just push your legs back and fuck you as hard as he can and cum and, hopefully, it will push you over with him.

    Men are microwaves, 1 minute and we can be done. However, if we're only on it for just a bit at a time and then back to it, it's not 60 seconds spread out, it's 15 seconds here, 20 there, 5 there, 30 there and, before long, you've got 30 maybe 45 minutes of fuckin' that's a been happening all while you delicious women work up to a boil.

    Doesn't matter how hot the flame is, more intense, less intense, as long as there is some heat, it's time that works for you dear creatures, yes?

    OK, I came.... :lol
     
  16. outofmymind

    outofmymind Member

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    I can last for a couple hours if using a condom, without a condom I tend to cum really fast too. I dunno what can work for you, a thicker condom?
     
  17. Barbwire

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    Hey LP, welcome back man! Yes, we have discussed this before but there have been a lot of new members and I wanted to see what they had to say.
     
  18. Stormin10

    Stormin10 Member

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    Damn there are some quick guys here.. i should move to the states!!