long distance relationships

Discussion in 'General Sex Discussion' started by little_tiger, Sep 30, 2003.

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  1. little_tiger

    little_tiger New Member

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    lets cut to the chase... long distance relationships, is it worth it?

    no sex, no hugs, no kisses... can a relationship last without physical contact?
     
  2. archer_007

    archer_007 New Member

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    Yes, I believe it can.
    However, I do it causes people to have an inflated view of the other person, which only focuses on the positives, unlike everyday contact, which renforces both positivies and negatives.
     
  3. little_tiger

    little_tiger New Member

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    so do you think a relationship could develop properly if both involved only focus on the good things, not the bad?
     
  4. archer_007

    archer_007 New Member

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    Could a relationship develop further? Yes.
    Will it necessisaly be healthy? Many not.
     
  5. Shellen77

    Shellen77 New Member

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    I was in a long distance relationship for 3 1/2 years. It was great at times & it was awful at times. We were 500 miles apart & it was that way from the very beginning. One of us would fly to see each other every couple of months. After so long, it was starting to get old & I found out that he never had intentions of moving me out with him. So I cut it off & have vowed to never do it again. To me, it was more heartache than what it was worth. Plus, I have issues with trusting men & I felt that I couldn't trust him 100% because I wasn't there to see exactly what he was doing.
     
  6. little_tiger

    little_tiger New Member

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    thats true, trust is an issue... and if he had no intention of moving in with you then you made the right choice. screw the bastard!!
     
  7. Shellen77

    Shellen77 New Member

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    My thoughts exactly! Too bad it took me so damn long to figure out his true intentions! But it was one huge learning experience..and lemme tell ya I learned my leason! LOL!:D
     
  8. little_tiger

    little_tiger New Member

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    i know what you mean. some of the guys i have dated have jerked me around, and i have been so blind to see it. but like you said, i guess you have to learn from the experience or else it will just happen again.
     
  9. archer_007

    archer_007 New Member

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    Well, ive had a positive exspearance and a negative one with long-distance relationships. The key is just like any other relationship, Do you trust the person?
     
  10. acidrain47

    acidrain47 New Member

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    hmm hard question actually...i sustained a long distance relationship for 2 years during which i went to a very big college, we had a no sex pact with anyone else...and i gave head to someone else....i guess i was young and thought we had explicitly said no sex= no intercourse...during these two years, we just communicated via internet, phone etc. no visits....i moved there for him...15 hours away....he had found out about what i did....i didn't think we meant oral i guess..now i see that was wrong, but together we just weren't the same, both changed and different, and it turned into a horrible roller coaster for 3 years, i stayed b/c i felt i had to make things right and it was my fault he'd become a bitter asshole...in realization he'd been having sex with some other girl before i moved there and continued to be with her..it was a horrible experience for me...to make a long story short we ende dup together finally and i lived with him for a year, we broke up in may, and although i learned alot, i do regret leaving all my friends and family for a guy who wasn't really worth it...i kept convincing myself i had to be in love with him...but how can you love someone who hurts you so much...i guess i thought i'd finally see the sweet loving person i met but i never did. I moved back home this may after we broke it off...i visited my best friend for a week and met the most awesome, caring, sensitive guy ever, but i wasn't looking for a relationship, he left for college in august...my old college...i miss dearly....and so now i guess we've developed into being a "couple"...i visit him twice a month, and although i have trust issues due to being cheated on 7 times with my ex...he is a very loyal and open person and so now i'm doing the long distance thing again...i'll be moving closer to him when i go back to college next semester...i took a year off b/c of the emotional trauma of the past one...so does long distance work? still not sure...hoping so though? I think it takes alot of trust...and if that's broken...then perhaps not. grrr.....like i said hard question
     
  11. little_tiger

    little_tiger New Member

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    i'm really glad things are going well for you and this new guy, the other one sounds like and asshole. i guess you made the right choice. the first boy didn't seem to make the commitment of being a "couple" and that screwed you two up. without his imput into the relationship the entire thing collapsed. i guess if both people are willing to make it work than it's possible...right?
     
  12. Stones76

    Stones76 New Member

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    After all these years, I've found my grrl. She's just about THE perfect one for me, as I am the perfect guy for her. Only problem is that she lives exactly on the opposite part of the planet. I'm in Barcelona, she's in Perth.

    It's all worth it if you know that the other one IS the one, if it's just another relationship I wouldn't bother..

    I'll move there as soon as I can.. I just can't right now, but my ass is there in less than 2 years.
     
  13. archer_007

    archer_007 New Member

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    Similar issue here, Lickerr. Thankfully mine is intracountry. :D
     
  14. Shellen77

    Shellen77 New Member

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    Wish you guys the very best of luck!:)
     
  15. little_tiger

    little_tiger New Member

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    it's cool that you guys are willing to wait to be with your g/fs. if you can overcome those boudaries then you can overcome a lot more.
     
  16. BiBiBaby

    BiBiBaby New Member

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    As long as the trust is there it can happen. my man and i live roughly 400 miles apart. we see eachother ABOUT every two weeks although sometimes its up to a month which sucks. we have ran up some outragious phone bills ect. he lives with a girl but i trust him when he says he's not intimate with her. next year we are both moving a couple hours and will be in the same town. we made sure we both had alterior motives for moving though (mine is school, his is to be closer to his family) because we know that if we change our lives for eachother and something goes wrong we'd be up a creek without a paddle. i'm excited though. my heart and head both tell me this can work and will.
     
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